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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsResigning House Leader Cantor Reflects On All The Accomplishments He Thwarted
WASHINGTONLooking back on his 13-year tenure in the House of Representatives with reverence, resigning House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-VA) reflected on the long list of accomplishments he had thwarted during his time in office, sources confirmed Thursday. From obstructing a jobs bill to put Americans back to work in 2011, to derailing gun control measures any time they reached my desk, I feel blessed to have had such an incredible run of preventing productive policies, and even a few pieces of landmark legislation, from ever passing, said Cantor, explaining that as a young man, he never would have dreamed that some day he would be in a position to hinder the entire American lawmaking process and completely neuter dozens of bills. Of course, Im disappointed because I thought I had many more years of impeding accomplishments ahead of me, and Ill be the first to admit that I never quite managed to stall environmental policies as much as I would have liked. But at the end of the day, Im very proud of how I helped Congress accomplish so little during my time in office. Cantor added that he took solace that his legacy of hampering federal policy was secure, and trusted that many, many more in his party would be inspired to follow in his footsteps.
http://www.theonion.com/articles/resigning-house-leader-cantor-reflects-on-all-the,36268/
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Resigning House Leader Cantor Reflects On All The Accomplishments He Thwarted (Original Post)
MrScorpio
Jun 2014
OP
One of the best things about Onion is that they don't allow comments to the articles.
tofuandbeer
Jun 2014
#5
rocktivity
(44,577 posts)1. if I do say so myself...
bearssoapbox
(1,408 posts)2. Only 13 years?
Seems much....much....much
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Longer.
Jamaal510
(10,893 posts)3. The America that could've been, but still has yet to be.
All thanks to Cantor and The Gang.
BrotherIvan
(9,126 posts)4. I hope to never see that scumbag again
May his greedy, corrupt heart rot in obscurity.
tofuandbeer
(1,314 posts)5. One of the best things about Onion is that they don't allow comments to the articles.
Of course, I'd be ALL for some made up "Onion-esque" comments.
Those would be hilarious!
AngryDem001
(684 posts)6. Ugh.
I think what I hate most about him is his stupid fucking smug face.
CatWoman
(79,302 posts)8. and that stupid fucking whiny voice
Scuba
(53,475 posts)7. I like the Onion better when they did satire.