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HomerRamone

(1,112 posts)
Tue Apr 15, 2014, 07:43 PM Apr 2014

Once again, the most truthful website in the world...

WASHINGTON—Putting the nation on alert against what it has described as a “highly credible terrorist threat,” the FBI announced today that it has uncovered a plot by members of al-Qaeda to sit back and enjoy themselves while the United States collapses of its own accord.

Multiple intelligence agencies confirmed that the militant Islamist organization and its numerous affiliates intend to carry out a massive, coordinated plan to stand aside and watch America’s increasingly rapid decline, with terrorist operatives across the globe reportedly mobilizing to take it easy, relax, and savor the spectacle as it unfolds.

“We have intercepted electronic communication indicating that al-Qaeda members are actively plotting to stay out of the way while America as we know it gradually crumbles under the weight of its own self-inflicted debt and disrepair,” FBI Deputy Director Mark F. Giuliano told the assembled press corps. “If this plan succeeds, it will leave behind a nation with a completely dysfunctional economy, collapsing infrastructure, and a catastrophic health crisis afflicting millions across the nation. We want to emphasize that this danger is very real.”

“And unfortunately, based on information we have from intelligence assets on the ground, this plot is already well under way,” he added.


http://www.theonion.com/articles/fbi-uncovers-alqaeda-plot-to-just-sit-back-and-enj,35788/?utm_source=The+Onion&utm_campaign=acd3e39580-The_Onion_Newsletter_Daily_Template&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_6a8b5ad20e-acd3e39580-17228849
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Once again, the most truthful website in the world... (Original Post) HomerRamone Apr 2014 OP
It never ceases to amaze me, Suich Apr 2014 #1
They need to tweak that line about the debt though because it is now down to 2007 levels Samantha Apr 2014 #2
The DEBT is not down at all, deficits might be. nt Demo_Chris Apr 2014 #3
The blurb I heard today on MSNBC said "debt" Samantha Apr 2014 #7
I've always wondered why al-Qaeda doesn't do exactly that. toby jo Apr 2014 #4
Damn you, Onion sakabatou Apr 2014 #5
The most accurate headline ever: ybbor Apr 2014 #6

Samantha

(9,314 posts)
2. They need to tweak that line about the debt though because it is now down to 2007 levels
Tue Apr 15, 2014, 10:12 PM
Apr 2014

Not great, I know, but a big improvement.

Very interesting.

Sam

Samantha

(9,314 posts)
7. The blurb I heard today on MSNBC said "debt"
Tue Apr 15, 2014, 10:54 PM
Apr 2014

I am not going to argue the point because it is very clear some people use those terms -- debt and deficit -- interchangeably. Just looking at the search results I pulled up just now, even the media does.

But take a look at this article from this time last year (entitled "Deficit Surprise: US Pays Down national Debt":

"For the first time since 2007 – before the recession – the US Treasury is planning to make a down payment on the federal debt. The budget deficit has been shrinking more than expected. Thanks to government spending cuts, and higher tax receipts The Treasury says it expects to pay off $35 billion of debt in the second quarter. That compares to an earlier forecast that it would have to borrow $103 billion. Usually this time of year is the best for government cash flow because annual tax returns flood into the Treasury in April. But the return to at least one quarter of debt paydown is a clear sign government spending cuts and tax increases have helped lower the deficit."

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/business/2013/04/us-pays-down-national-debt/

So it does appear the deficit has shrunk somewhat and the excess revenues will pay off a little bite of the debt (which I believe is your point).

I am thinking perhaps since it is the same time of the year as when this article was written last year, meaning the Treasury is collecting a boatload of moolah at income tax time while experiencing more cutbacks in spending, it has paid down another sliver of what we all owe....????

 

toby jo

(1,269 posts)
4. I've always wondered why al-Qaeda doesn't do exactly that.
Tue Apr 15, 2014, 10:44 PM
Apr 2014

Putting it into words would be pretty masterful, if you think about it.

Another one they should put out : " Send your dollars to the NRA , American guns are killing more Americans than we could even wish to".

or

" Support the Republican Party, they are bringing America to its knees faster than we can".

ybbor

(1,554 posts)
6. The most accurate headline ever:
Tue Apr 15, 2014, 10:50 PM
Apr 2014

Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'

January 17, 2001

This headline was greater than Nostradamus could have ever wished. Please "Google" it for the article. (I'm not savvy enough on the iPad to copy the URL)

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