Wonkette on the new "Conservative Teen" magazine

[hifiguy]

<snip>

Because conservatives don’t actually like to read, in the table of contents of this first issue of TCT, each article is listed with its word count, e.g. “1799 words,” as a warning, and so that readers may know that they must set aside five to six hours for each.

The first article is a beautiful thing about Glee that details so much about this show, it is clear that the author secretly has seen every episode six times. The author also knows the material that the locker room bench that Lea Michele sat on in her scandalous GQ photo shoot is made of (“pine”). The “section” of the magazine that this falls under is “Liberal Bias,” naturally. The article also makes sure to define any big words that might appear daunting to young whites


http://wonkette.com/468250/amazing-magazine-the-conservative-teen-has-a-lot-to-say-none-of-it-by-teens#more-468250

They may sell tens, even dozens of subscriptions.

[Cirque du So-What]

1. As noted in a previous thread on this subject

Here's the cover photo showing two sufficiently Aryan yoots.



Here's a stock photo - portrait of a couple of kids. Woman and man sitting together as part of a study group or in class. They're not even American; they're Danish. Gee, I wonder why the photo was cropped?

http://www.123rf.com/photo_2224014_portrait-of-a-couple-of-kids-woman-and-man-sitting-together-as-part-of-a-study-group-or-in-class.html

Thanks to DUer Beartracks

[Fawke Em]

2. LOL! I copied the pic, too, to point out

the lily whiteness of the cover models.

[geardaddy]

8. Great catch.

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

3. Why oh why did I click on the link to the first issue? I don't know what I liked better.

The "Ronald Reagan First Black President" piece, the "Why Abstinence Works" one or the high-larious comic strips. Please kill me now.

[Fawke Em]

5. Those comic strips were horrid, weren't they?

Do conservatives really not get humor or irony?

[geardaddy]

9. Yeah especially the "LAUGH OUT LOUD!"

title on all of them. Then one about the dead soldier keeping us safe from terra.

I think I need a shower now.

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

10. They really got the pulse of today's kids. LOL, get it?

[geardaddy]

13. Oh, I got it.

I agree with you:

[Cirque du So-What]

11. Where did you get all those articles?

I tried, but got this:

Subscribe

Regrettably, we were unable to reach the minimum number of subscribers required to mass print the first issue of The Conservative Teen magazine.

You can buy a full-length hard copy of this issue at MagCloud:

I am sorely disappointed.

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

14. They changed it. Under the contents tab they had a free PDF version you could click through.

It's like they knew we were laughing our asses off.

[Cirque du So-What]

15. Dammitall!

I was just getting around to exploring their specious content!

[Initech]

4. Do they have a word count on the articles like calorie counts on menus?

Warning: you may actually learn something... or not.

[and-justice-for-all]

6. sad, very very sad..nt

[geardaddy]

7. I was just reading her take on it.

Hilarious and scary all at once.

The comments are priceless.

[Cirque du So-What]

12. To paraphrase John Lennon

If ya go publishin' pictures of Raygun

Ya know they won't be havin' any fun