Hey! I just had an episiotomy...no, an epicenter...no, an epiphany!
I can talk like a RW Congressman, and I didn't even know it!
Examples:
"Fuck you!" followed by "I was inarticulate."
"Your mother's a whore!" followed by "That remark was taken out of context."
"
Fill-in-the-blank) should be taken out and shot" followed by "This would benefit them greatly in the long run"
"You are a lying traitor!" followed by "I was not referring to you personally."
BTW, the best way to handle one of these folk if they insult you in some fashion as above is to allow them to completely finish and then say real sincerely and amazedly, "That's remarkable - that is EXACTLY what your wife said to me in the shower yesterday."
They will never ever be able to get that image out of their heads: everytime their wife says "I'm going to take a shower" or when they themselves get in the shower, or when they see you. I use it infrequently but to great effect.
Just a thought on a cold Saturday here in the City of Brotherly Love...
= new reply since forum marked as read
Spoken like a TRUE EvilDUer! 
Fuck with 'em! Just fuck with 'em!
I like to envision something that makes them wake up in the morning and the first thing they do is reach over to their nightstand for the bottle of Maalox. Whatever makes 'em do that is what I will like.
Thanks PCIntern. Everyone needs a good morning laugh.
