I know a dittohead who’s dumb beyond belief

[Cyrano]

My neighbor’s cousin is visiting her here in Florida. This cousin thinks Limbaugh is “brilliant,” he watches Fox “News” to “stay informed,” and he’s a fundamentalist “Christian” who thinks science is made-up myth.

A few days ago, we went over to the beach and I decided to find out exactly how far his non-belief in science went.

There was a cargo ship out toward the horizon and it was sailing south. I asked him if he knew that ships going south moved faster than ships going north. “Really?” he said. “How come?” I told him to look at any map or globe and that it was obvious that ships sailing south were going downhill and ships sailing north were going uphill. Nodding his head he said, “That’s interesting. I never realized that.”

This is a true story and, quite honestly, I find it frightening to have to share the planet with people this incredibly stupid. It might be proof positive that listening to Limbaugh and watching Fox “News” rots your brain.

[KG]

1. when i meet someone that stupid, and i have met a few, i wonder how they remember to keep breathing

[The Wielding Truth]

17. That's why evolution made it involuntary. They were stupid enough to forget.

[hobbit709]

18. I think some of them are regressing.

[PotatoChip]

63. 'The Planet Of The Apes' might not have been overly farfetched after all.

Ugh, and w/fundy families like the Duggars, their numbers could overwhelm ours in just a few generations.

[lastlib]

2. Of course, it's the other way around below the equator.....

[Cyrano]

4. No, it's the same. Look at any map or globe.

[geckosfeet]

8. Nonsense. North is up, south is down.

[n2doc]

14. That's why Antarctica is covered in ice

All the icebergs fall down there.

[csziggy]

32. AH - Gotcha! Ice floats, so Antarctica HAS to be uphill from the Equator!

Of course, the reason there is more ice in Antarctica than at the North Pole is there are more oceans to freeze in the Southern Hemisphere than in the Northern one.

[PCIntern]

38. Very small rocks float too... n/t

[Chorophyll]

53. And if I weigh the same as a duck, then I'm a witch. nt

[NatBurner]

72. this probably explains why i'm afraid of ducks.

science!

[Cyrano]

39. I'm not sure you're right about this. Human excretion also floats, but

it doesn't all end up in Antarctica.

[Thor_MN]

41. Everyone knows that ice sinks South of the equator... Duh...

[csziggy]

42. Oh - you're right! Gravity is reversed - that's why Australians don't fall off

The bottom of the earth!

My bad.

[Jackpine Radical]

5. Is it true that dogs turn counterclockwise before lying down

in the southern hemisphere?

[Cyrano]

10. Yes. Obviously, that's the way God wanted it to be

[DLCistheGOP]

3. How about naming this 'person'

and were they are from so they can be avoided.

Think of it as a public service.

No one should be exposed to that level of stupid.

[Cyrano]

6. His first name is Thomas and he's from California

On edit: He flew here from California and I found that surprising. After all, if science is a myth, what's keeping the plane in the air?

[ohheckyeah]

43. The answer is obvious -

angels. Duh.

[brewens]

7. It's like the "you can't find a fish turning into a frog in nature" argument against

evolution. Of course most of the people you see saying something like that on tv, know that that's not how anyone claims evolution really works. It's a quick one liner that can be easily taught to a half-wit. It makes sense to them and it's easy to remember.

[Ichingcarpenter]

9. “Make sure your answer uses Scripture, not logic.”

Gravity: Doesn’t exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that’s just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it’s not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn’t the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.






Apes are just creatures twisted by Satan to mock Jesus by giving EVILolition credibility. Further more they are naturally lust crazed for human women. Since they are not natural creatures they should be exterminated forthwith as the tools of evil they are.


Everyone knows scientists insist on using complex terminology to make it harder for True Christians to refute their claims.Deoxyribonucleic Acid, for example… sounds impressive, right? But have you ever seen what happens if you put something in acid? It dissolves! If we had all this acid in our cells, we’d all dissolve! So much for the Theory of Evolution, Check MATE!


There are a lot of things I have concluded to be wrong, without studying them in-depth. Evolution is one of them. The fact that I don’t know that much about it does not bother me in the least.



100 Greatest Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian Chat Rooms


http://ibastudent.wordpress.com/2008/01/15/100-greatest-quotes-from-fundamentalist-christian-chat-rooms/

[treestar]

34. Scary set of quotes

The word of God has been in heaven forever. The KJV has always been there. The so called Hebrew words like Alleluia are English words. The English did not borrow them from the Hebrew but rather the Hebrew borrowed them from the English. If the KJV has always been there and is the original word of God then there is no other conclusion. The same can be said for any so called Greek words that were borrowed from the Greek or transliterated. It is a matter of what bias you approach this particular subject.

Me and like-minded Christian students are trying to organize a mock stoning of openly gay students at our campus. We will be using crumpled up gray/brown construction paper to represent rocks, and will recite bible verses in opposition to their sinful nature. We will throw a volley or two of these “rocks” at every Gay person we happen to encounter that day.

Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It’s no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history.

A woman wants to abort a rape child? She should have thought of that before she walked down that dark alley without a male prescence, not to mention she should have thought before putting on revealing attire….Should’ve stayed in the house where it’s safe.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

64. Holy Shit.

I didn't realize it got THAT stupid! Wow.

[HopeHoops]

11. There's another kind of dittohead?

[n2doc]

12. Yep. He should add "But I repeat myself" to his thread title n/t

[HopeHoops]

19. Rush Limpballs repeats himself all the time. Why the fuck is he still on the air?

I can't imagine why any advertiser would agree to be tainted by association with Jaba the Slut.

[n2doc]

20. He has served his masters well

So long as the oligarchs think he can be effective in spreading propaganda, he will remain on the air and everywhere. Even if there are no advertisers.

[HopeHoops]

51. Didn't work for BecKKK - there's always hope.

[RZM]

57. Repeating yourself over and over is how most political commentators make their living

It's probably why not everybody is cut out for it.

[HopeHoops]

58. Rush Limpballs repeats himself all the time. Why the fuck is he still on the air?

D'OH! I need a radio show now!!!

[Arkansas Granny]

13. This kind of ignorance is almost scary. It does, however, explain why they are so easily

convinced to support politicians who don't give a shit about them. The RW needs the dumb, low information voter to get elected.

[Art_from_Ark]

71. I think that's one reason for their war on public schools

[leftyohiolib]

15. "dittohead who’s dumb beyond belief"" isnt that redundant?

isnt that what dittohead means?

[ScottLand]

16. When someone identifies himself/herself to Rush as a dittohead,

they're letting him know he's doing the thinking for them.

[greytdemocrat]

21. Man...

That's really moronic.

[1StrongBlackMan]

22. Do you think ...

This neighbor's cousin internal response may have been: "Yeah right ... Is this guy/gal nuts?" But was merely being polite? And he/she is telling a that stupid liberal story, as we speak?

I find it hard to believe that anyone over the age of 10 would believe that a ship sailing south goes fast because it's going down hill. But then ... I haven't met your neighbor's cousin.

[lunatica]

25. Everyone knows North is up

Have you ever seen the maps looking like this?



Proof positive that North is up. LOL!

[sammytko]

27. Yea, he could have just been trying to be nice

That was my first thought.

[lunatica]

23. Maggots for brains

Ewwwwww! That mental picture is bleachworthy!

[Shankapotomus]

24. You have to befriend him

He is obviously so lost he can hardly be a threat and probably easily led to water.

[Demonaut]

26. I cant belive he dint no that

lol, you shouldn't screw with his head like that or he may think you're an idiot now

[Cyrano]

29. There was the possiblity that he

wouldn't have bought my explanation. For all I knew, he might have believed the world was flat.

[lonestarnot]

28. How can you stand to be around that?

Just wondering.

[Cyrano]

30. As I said in the OP, sharing this planet with people like that really frightens me.

[lonestarnot]

33. So it frightens you, is that all?

[Cyrano]

37. It's part of the reason I'm an agnostic. What kind of "Supreme Being" would have created dumbness?

[lonestarnot]

70. No supreme being did snort.

[certainot]

31. my dad's cousin was visiting with his wife and we went to the 'mall', where a busker was swallowing

swords. he was good. we stood close and could see in detail as the busker swallowed a number of different styles and sizes of blades. then he did a squiggly sword and we could see his adam's apple moving back and forth. they saw it from close with their own eyes but continued afterwards to deny that it could be real.

you sold the 'joke' because you were 'certain'. i like this explanation of why certainty sells..... and where that denial comes from.....

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[Sheepshank]

35. Errr....... I don't know about that south bound shipping being faster

I'd heard the magnetic pull of the North Poll is much stronger than that of the South Pole (Santa's influence I suppose). That 's why ships are made of iron so that they can travel by pull. When they want to go south, they just flipa switch and set up a low level electrical charge through hull of the ship to reject the "pull" Northward and voila, the could even float South.

But then that little tid bit would involve science and physics lingo, so I can understand you not wanting to get into all of that with your neighbor.

[whistler162]

36. I will have to assume that 20 years ago

it was dump N***** or P**** stories that caught your fancy.

[Cyrano]

40. I don't understand what you're saying, wistler162. It sounds insulting.

[jillan]

44. I wish someone could take a poll and see how many rw wackos still believe that Saddam Hussein

is responsible for 9/11.

I bet the numbers would be shocking.

[backscatter712]

45. Did he look like these characters?

[Cyrano]

50. Good video. And scary as hell.

[Hugabear]

46. Someone like that could be really fun to fuck around with

Here in Orlando, we have a popular talk show host (Jim Phillips, WTKS "Philips Phile&quot who sometimes likes to spin elaborate stories for his more naive listeners.

One of them involved a "Keyunnel" - an underwater tunnel connecting Fort Myers, FL to Key West (would be a few hundred miles long). He's actually gotten a few people to believe that. Would be very interesting to see if you could get this idiot to fall for this.

[Strelnikov_]

47. That was mean

They know what they know when they know.

You are just a liberal know-it-all meanie!

[Cyrano]

49. I may in fact be a "liberal know-it-all meanie." But at least I didn't make his head explode.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

48. Ditto head + dumb is redundant.

[Initech]

55. True but anyone who doesn't acknowledge science, well...

[11 Bravo]

52. Big deal! If you know one who ISN'T, get back to us.

[Initech]

54. I have a theory that if we get Limbaugh off the air...

People would collectively blink and start thinking for themselves and realize the GOP's lies, slander and stupidity that they've wrought upon us for the last 100 years.

But then again with the Fox Ministry Of Propaganda still around, maybe not...

[RZM]

56. Sounds like you basically set him up for your own amusement

For all you know in his head he was thinking:

'That sounds kind of dumb, but I don't want to be rude so I'll just nod and smile.'

What's next, a banana peel?

[Cyrano]

61. Now, now, let's not get judgemental here. After all, I was talking to a dittohead who

Last edited Sun Mar 11, 2012, 06:45 PM - Edit history (1)

thinks Limbaugh's "slut" and "prostitute" garbage were "right on."

His cousin (my neighbor) was biting her tongue trying not to laugh. She knows he's a wingnut, (she's a liberal), but she never told him I was putting him on.

[progressoid]

62. ...

[Vinca]

59. Disturbing and funny all at once.

[B Calm]

60. Unemployment insurance is welfare

is what a ditto head told me last Friday.

[marlakay]

65. I used to be in a bookclub with this smart lady

that had Palin for pres on her car. I used to think how can this educated lady like her? All I could think was religion.

Scary the people in this country.

[TheKentuckian]

66. Being a dittohead means being dumb as dogshit

Whether it is raw capacity issue or wilful ignorance taken to an extreme, there they are and logically must be.

[Kablooie]

67. But there are enough of these buffoons to make Limbaugh and Fox the highest rated shows by far.

In their respective categories. (Assuming Fox is in the news category. A debatable topic.)

And each of those imbeciles has a vote with exactly as much influence as you do.


A people were created equal except for those that weren't.

[niyad]

68. sadly, just a couple of weeks ago, I overheard someone say that he never listened to cnn because

it was liberal, and lied. he only listened to fixed noise, because they NEVER slanted the news, and were always accurate.

I could have pointed out the obvious, but figured I would have been wasting my breath, even though it is fun to play with their teeny widdle "minds" at times.

[ElboRuum]

69. There are no words...

...to express the stupid overload I am now experiencing. How has this person not died from... oh... I dunno... accidentally tying his shoes to a bus?