Wilmington City Council Passes Resolution Urging 'Personhood' Rights For Sperm

[DeSwiss]

[font size=4]Wilmington City Council Passes Resolution Urging 'Personhood' Rights For Sperm[/font]

The Huffington Post | Luke Johnson | Updated: 03/ 2/2012 3:28 pm



The Wilmington City Council has a message for men -- sperm are people, too. The council for Delaware's largest city passed a resolution by an 8-4 vote Thursday calling on the Delaware legislature, other state legislatures and the U.S. Congress to pass laws granting "personhood" rights to eggs and sperm.

The resolution was authored by councilwoman Loretta Walsh as a protest in the current battle over women's health care access.

"{E}ach 'egg person' and each 'sperm person' should be deemed equal in the eyes of the government and be subject to the same laws and regulations as any other dependent minor and be protected against abuse, neglect or abandonment by the parent or guardian," says the resolution. "{L}aws should be enacted by all legislative bodies in the United States to promote equal representation, and should potentially include laws in defense of 'personhood,' forbidding every man from destroying his semen."

The vote came the same day that the U.S. Senate voted down an amendment that would have given employers the right to refuse any health care service to employees for moral reasons.

MORE

[font color=blue] - Hmmm..... so if this things goes all the way, I wonder how much time a person would get for having a wet dream???[/font]
=====================================================================
[font color=blue]DeSwiss[/font]


[font size=4][center]''Every Sperm Is Sacred''[/font]

[/center]

[elleng]

1. WHICH Wilmington???

[csziggy]

3. Delaware

"The council for Delaware's largest city passed a resolution by an 8-4 vote Thursday calling on the Delaware legislature, other state legislatures and the U.S. Congress to pass laws granting "personhood" rights to eggs and sperm."

[LynneSin]

5. That's what I thought until I saw Loretta Walsh's name

You go Loretta!

She's a hoot!

[rucky]

6. Here's a non Huffpo version

with facts and sources and a pretty funny lead. It was proposed to make a point, but they actually passed it:

http://www.philly.com/philly/news/20120302_Wilmington_resolution_urges_equal_rights_for_sperm.html

[FSogol]

2. Strange, you seem to have forgotten the link to The Onion.

Do they realize that every, um shot of sperm contains 2,000,000 of what they want to call people?

[csziggy]

4. Just cause there's more of them doesn't make it less of a 'crime'

?

[FSogol]

8. LOL. Will the Wilmington Police collect all the tissues as evidence?

"Found another one chief!"

[csziggy]

21. Some places women have been investigated for having miscarriages

I think that is why the councilwoman proposed this resolution - to highlight the absurdity.

I can't imagine a woman having a miscarriage of desired pregnancy and then have to defend herself for the 'crime' of losing her baby. But that is where we seem to be headed.

So if men can be brought to realize that somethings are not up for control of their government, maybe they will start really thinking about what they are trying to do to women.

[AlbertCat]

76. "Found another one chief!"

"and we haven't even left police headquarters yet!"

[LynneSin]

9. Loretta Walsh is great city council member and very pro-choice

She pissed at all this 'egg as personhood' bullshit.

[DeSwiss]

11. Or, I could have linked to the GOP's website.....

...that's pretty much the same thing as The Onion, right? Bizarre BS put forth in all seriousness?

[targetpractice]

12. I just learned at least 39 million per "shot" according to the WHO

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semen_analysis

[Gore1FL]

62. I suddenly feel like Hitler. n/t

[targetpractice]

64. You've got some work to do... I'm at like Borg level by now. n/t

[truth2power]

75. Given your username I can see why. LOL! n/t

[catrose]

24. Really

How ignorant can you get? Or maybe, how ignorant and pass it into law?

[xtraxritical]

84. A gaggle of "circle jerks"? eom

[magical thyme]

66. which means shooting a wad = mass murder

unless, of course, it's into a woman's vagina.

[HowHeThinks]

82. That makes me........

the world's most prolific serial killer. Oh, the humanity!

[aquart]

80. That's a lot of Republican votes.

[MarianJack]

7. A wet dream would be Manslaughter,...

...masturbation would be first degree murder. Iw would be several million counts so the whacker would be a mass murderer.

I'd have earned about 100 trillion life sentences when I was 13 alone!

PEACE!

[DeSwiss]

13. Yeah, that's what I figured too.....

...involuntary manslaughter.

- So I guess that would make a boner attempted murder.....

[Go Vols]

51. conspiracy

to commit maybe

[MarianJack]

60. If a girl geves her boyfriend a hand job,...

...would she be an accessory, an accomplice or what?

PEACE! (or maybe in this context, PIECE!?)

[magical thyme]

67. boner = wmd nt

[mercuryblues]

35. A wet

a wet dream would be genocide. Can you see all the war crime tribunals now. Men would not make it past puberty.

[MarianJack]

61. Genocise,...

...and Monica Lewinski's dress would have been a killing field.

PEACE! (or, in this context, PIECE!?)

[mercuryblues]

77. LOL

A blow job would result in the giver being an accomplice. Warrents issued to 'recover' the evidence. Stomachs pumped, evidence sent to crime labs. Now I see where the jobs are.

[targetpractice]

10. Each wet dream would be a genocide worse than 10 holocausts...

According to the logic of this protest resolution and Wikipedia...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semen_analysis

[DeSwiss]

15. But think of all the people that have been ''saved'' from worldwide over-population!

- Which would make this a great argument for masturbation.....

[Solly Mack]

14. Socks & assorted garments as murder weapons. Nocturnal Emissions as involuntary manslaughter.

Premature ejaculations would be negligent homocide.


Tampons and pads would deserve a proper burial. Have to bury the socks, sheets etc. as well.

My, my, my.

[DeSwiss]

17. ROFLMAO!!!!

[Solly Mack]

23. Sperm banks would either be human trafficking or orphanages.

Either you're selling little people or you're keeping them safe for adoption.

Probably will depend on who is running the sperm banks.

[DeSwiss]

43. Awwww.....

...look at the cute little ''Snowflake Sperms'' in the window.

[woodsprite]

16. I think that petroleum smell that was wafting over here from NJ a few days ago

has fried some brains.

[DeSwiss]

18. I thought it helped one live next to New Jersey.....

...if they have fried brains. Whoops!

- j/k New Jersians!!!!!

[Curmudgeoness]

19. I love it!!!!!!!

It's about time that we brought the boys into this silliness.

I am still laughing---but I am surprised that they had 8 people on city council willing to vote "yes".

[LynneSin]

25. Wilmington City Council is uber left wing

[kentauros]

20. This could be a boon in the voting booth.

I could make my vote count at least 39 million times!

[DeSwiss]

31. Yeah, sure okay.....

...as long as I don't have to vote AFTER you!

[kentauros]

52. Mail-in Ballot.

Of course, I don't envy the person that has to open all those sticky pages

[etherealtruth]

22. Pure genius

It illustrates the point beautifully ... it will be lost on the right wing knuckle draggers and other cerebrally challenged ... but it certainly highlights the absurdity of of many of the proposed right wing laws

[kestrel91316]

26. I support this 100% as long as the War on Women continues.

[DeSwiss]

33. Til' the bitter end.....

...I'm afraid.

[wendylaroux]

27. it's all a bit much to swallow though.

[nolabear]

29. *snort!*

[DeSwiss]

36. Just remember.....

...you're doing it for the children.

[targetpractice]

28. I'm amazed that I exist...

I believe that I exist due the the mind-bogglingly random and once-in-a-universe happenstance that a particular sperm and egg met forty something years ago... resulting in a unique zygote that ultimately became who I am today. I have no clue when my former zygote or fetus self became sentient or acquired a "soul", but I realize that I am here because I was lucky enough to avoid any "interruptions" along the way (e.g., lost in masturbation, failed fertilization, abortion, miscarriage, or being hit by a bus much later).

I am an atheist, but I do feel "blessed" to be a person who came to be from a one-time ever happenstance. Sometimes thinking like this can lead me to become overwhelmed by the "persons" who never had the chance to be. But, that's how human biology works. And, absolutely nobody has the right to force a woman to be pregnant if she doesn't want to be.



Upon edit: I want to change the word "blessed" above to something like "extraordinarily humbled"... Whenever I use the word "blessed" as an atheist... I mean extremely fortunate not divinely favored.

[DeSwiss]

37. Well, think of it this way.....

...all those unborn egg-persons and sperm-persons were most likely born on other planets.

- Far, far way.......

[targetpractice]

39. Ha! I also get sad for all the sea turtle hatchlings that don't make it. n/t

[nolabear]

30. Woody Allen was a prophet!

[DeSwiss]

38. I love Woody.....

[saras]

32. Religious intellectuals will undoubtedly find a way to "save" them all as they come out.

They all go to heaven, no problem. Wank away, men.

[DeSwiss]

41. Why yes!

They even have a freeware program to help teach em' how to save them errant sperms!!!


Catch the Sperm II 1.0.2.67

[saras]

44. Not freeware, "Users are advised to pay attention while installing this ad-supported application"

Pretty damned funny, though. I'd hate to see these come around a corner in a war game. "Oh shit. Now we're REALLY fucked."

[DeSwiss]

46. Yeah, now that I look at it more closely it looks pretty crappy.

I don't know anything about it I just Googled "save the sperm" and there it was.

- It looks like Adware which it always more trouble than it's worth. Not to mention the malware some of them have. Eesh!

[Rosa Luxemburg]

34. Eric the half a bee

sperm is only half

[nolabear]

40. Cyril Connelly...

[DeSwiss]

42. She covered that.....

...by making the resolution applicable to both ''egg-persons'' AND ''sperm-persons.''

[Rosa Luxemburg]

73. The gametes!

[Angry Dragon]

45. Are they having a huge problem

with men leaving splashes on their sidewalks??
Something like no spitting ......... just wondering

[DeSwiss]

47. Yeah.

- At first they thought it was the just the birds again.....

[Manifestor_of_Light]

48. So each woman gets charged with murder 13 times a year?

For thirteen menstrual periods (lunar months of 28 days)????
For every year of her menstruating life? Forty or more years?

[SwissTony]

69. Yes, starting at 12 or 13 or whatever.

Lunacy...that's all I can say.

[MrMickeysMom]

49. Every "person" should have a home...

[targetpractice]

50. That pic is more like a major metropolitan city than just a home.

And the entire box is veritable planet.

[valerief]

54. Finally someone did this!

[valerief]

55. So one sperm to one egg. All the "wasted" sperm must be salvaged and frozen, else the

ejaculator faces prison time.

[Fuddnik]

56. Cannibalism convictions projected to skyrocket!

[hayrow1]

57. So, Who were the anti-life, supporters of mass murder that voted against the bill? Damn Liberuls.

[DCKit]

58. I've always thought of myself as a pretty nice guy.

Now I find out I'm a mass murderer on a scale bigger than our national debt.

[LynneSin]

65. Adolph Hitler got nothing on you!

(for those who can't figure it out - just joking!)

[JJW]

59. Demand a federal tax allowance for....

every saved sperm cell.

[Eatacig]

63. Death Penalty

So I guess this would end the death penalty. Just think of all the babies they would be killing.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

68. I'm going to keep mine, give them names, and have them apply for food stamps.

[Mendocino]

70. TURN BACK

fellow sperm, it's a BLOW JOB!

[LastLiberal in PalmSprings]

71. 'So masturbation would be child abuse'

First year Harvard law student Elle Wood in "Legally Blonde."

[cynatnite]

72. Okay, so how many tax deductions...I mean dependents...does that equate to? n/t

[caseymoz]

74. Elections would be counted with scientific numbers. nt

[jtuck004]

78. Will we have to name them? Buh-bye, Rocko, Ralph, Rudy, Sarah...

Or maybe a less gender specific way. Wiggly 1, Wiggly 2...

With average ejaculations of, say, 1 to 5 ml, and tens to a hundreds million or so of sperm per ml, would that be a separate count for each one? We would all die in the courtroom waiting on the reading of the charges...

What if someone gets some in their eye and it causes a wreck? Will they hold the sperm responsible as a separate individual, or could it be seen as gang activity?

Late night comedy folks have to be happy.

[ghjtydger]

79. Spam deleted by NRaleighLiberal (MIR Team)

[NYC_SKP]

86. DIE SPAMMER!!!!!!!

You mess with NRaleighLiberal and the MIR Team, YOU DIE!!!!

[ibegurpard]

81. oh that's awesome!

[sinkingfeeling]

83. Excellent. Why can't we play ALEC and get this to every city council?