Mr Obama, I've been followed in stores too...

[Bay Boy]

...and I've had women lock their car doors as I've approached them.

edit to add I'm a white guy

[uponit7771]

1. Are you trying to compare your experience to his or mine? tia

[Bay Boy]

2. I don't know what

your experience is. Tell me.

[uponit7771]

5. Being a black man in America...Is it your claim that my experience and your are the same culturally?

tia

[Bay Boy]

15. I'm sure our life experiences are different..

...but the last time I noticed a woman locking her car door as I approached I smiled thinking "Ok, I know I'm not a threat but I understand". What are your thoughts when that happens? Do you automatically think it's because of your race or your gender?

[uponit7771]

21. Come now, let us reason together. No I dont automatically think its because of my race or gender but

...given the FACTS I don't blame myself for thinking it's MOST LIKELY because of my race and gender

Given the FACTS

Given the FACTS I don't see why YOU would "most likely" think the same

regards

[Bay Boy]

23. Not sure I understand your reply...

...but I'm pretty sure that the woman locked her car door because of my gender. Now maybe if I was black I might have other thoughts about why I heard the 'click'.

[uponit7771]

25. I'm sayin because of the way that non whites are portrayed in America I don't think I'm out of order

... to think it might be because of my race.

Now maybe if I was black I might have other thoughts about why I heard the 'click'.

Yes, that's basically what I think Obama is saying.. that even HE.. HE has as reason to think that race is a gating factor on why the lady locked her door.

regards

[Ruby the Liberal]

37. Maybe wrap your head around your earlier comment

the last time I noticed a woman locking her car door as I approached I smiled

[lamp_shade]

3. Hmmmmm

[Boom Sound 416]

4. I ask my wife

To lock the car doors when she and kids waits while i run into a store

[Horse with no Name]

6. lol...yep...believing this one...

oh yes I am!

[Bay Boy]

17. What are you believing...

...or may be I should say not believing?

[etherealtruth]

8. Why would one attempt to diminish the experience that black Americans have?

It appears that is the intent of a post like this .... ?

[uponit7771]

10. They are coming out of the woodwork!!

[etherealtruth]

14. Why?

They can go to free republic or other knuckle dragging inbred led sites and have their racism validated. It'll feel good .... the brotherhood of skinheads and what not

[Marrah_G]

9. ~facepalm~

[gollygee]

11. What is your point here?

You assume because someone at some point followed you in a store that you have the same experience as someone who is black in the US? I hope that's not your assumption. He was using that as an example. It is not the total of his experience.

[Ruby the Liberal]

12. Creepy white guys will have that happen to them

Has nothing to do with the color of their skin.

[etherealtruth]

18. Oh my, you are of course correct

That explains it! I wrongly assumed he was just a racist trying to trivialize racism in America ... the creepy white guy thing escaped my mind (and yes I have locked my door every time they walk past)

[Ruby the Liberal]

24. I have spent a lot of time in the Middle East.

Middle Easterners do not phase me one iota. Yelling in arabic, wild physical arm movements in conversation - that is all part of the culture.

The day a man came into one of my bank branches in a full blown sweat with $15k cash wanting one of our employees to take the money and cut a check to some obscure chemical company WITHOUT attaching his account to the transaction record in any way? I was on the phone to legal/loss prevention faster than you could blink as per procedure.

It had nothing to do with his arabic nationality and everything to do with his ACTIONS.

[etherealtruth]

28. Exactly

A creepy guy is a creepy guy and has nothing to do with the horrific racism directed (especially) toward young black males.

As far as the reaction to middle easterner's and Muslims ... I married a Muslim. As it turned out he is an ass, it has nothing to do with his ethnicity or religion ... it is all him

[Ruby the Liberal]

31. I totally get it

My taste tends toward Middle Easterners - and have dated Israeli, Arabic and Persian (Iranian). Understanding the culture helps LOADS but at the end of the day, some people can just be plain old garden variety assholes.

Me thinks white boy being "profiled" by white folk needs to look at his actions...

[etherealtruth]

33. People are people

... and the poster (OP) ... I think we both drew the same conclusion.

[CrispyQ]

32. +++++1!

Best answer ever.

: thumbsup:

[hfojvt]

40. and creepy is usually just another word for either

a) poor
and/or
b) not good looking

could also mean "tired"

my current supervisor, when she was working the front desk (before she got the job as my supervisor) askled me to get rid of a guy who was creeping her out.

What I found was just a white guy with a backpack who seemingly had been biking all day, and I gave him directions to the park.

Later she expressed regret about not letting him use the showers at the community center. I might have suggested that too, but I thought she wanted to get rid of the guy.

As the janitor, I double as building security too, or back up security when building supervisors are present.

[Ruby the Liberal]

43. Maybe to you. I'm not quite that bigoted.

Again, it isn't someone's appearance that is a trigger for me - it is their ACTIONS. Like OP talking about someone locking her car doors, which made him "smile" as he continued to approach the car.

I guess being male, the "creepy" vibe never hit you - but trust me, women are more creeped out over someone acting like a freak than someone looking like they are down on their luck.

[Bay Boy]

45. Where did I say...

...that I continued towards the woman in the car?

[Ruby the Liberal]

47. Post 15

the last time I noticed a woman locking her car door as I approached I smiled

And unless you were a gas station attendant, why were you approaching an unknown woman sitting in her car?

[Bay Boy]

48. Maybe a comma will help...

...but the last time I noticed a woman locking her car door as I approached, I smiled thinking "Ok, I know I'm not a threat but I understand".

Now I suppose in your mind my smile was a leer and validated your response but you would be wrong. The smile was to myself, understanding why she did it. And why would a man cross the street in the crosswalk while a woman was stopped at a red light? Gosh I don't know.

[Ruby the Liberal]

49. Allow me to suggest that if a woman locked her car doors at a stoplight

as a white man was merely "walking the crosswalk", you must be even creepier in person than the posts on this thread suggest.

No offense.

[Bay Boy]

51. Take no offfense if I put you on ignore...

...but only because you don't appear to be too bright.

[Ruby the Liberal]

55. Allow me

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=myaccount&sub=ignore&add=246119

[kestrel91316]

56. Wow, you're a real charmer. No wonder women are scared of you.

[etherealtruth]

53. You are on fire

[Ruby the Liberal]

59. And I am only typing with one hand

its like shooting fish in a barrel.

[etherealtruth]

63. Admittedly

It does help that your opponent showed up for a battle of wit unarmed!

[Starry Messenger]

67. +1

[SQUEE]

71. I have sleeves and dreads, as well as many visible piercings

AND have for many years... I have often had people view me askew, and react in a fearful manner... But I would never equate my personal grooming and body mods, that I chose to get knowing societies view, with a person that is born with a complexion that is portrayed in much of our society as dangerous, or even with a person born gay, I CHOSE TO BE a visible pariah, for my own reasons, and can hide it almost anytime I want. Tell me a black man or woman can make that choice and I will give credence to your silly comparison.

[sorefeet]

13. I was sitting in the dentist chair

and the doctor had Limbaugh on the radio( I knew that wasn't good) and I told him how people of color were profiled. I said like when a black or Indian walks into Wal-Mart they automatically think the person is a thief. The dentist said well truth be known that IS what they're in there for in the first place. I called and canceled my next appointment. I told the secretary he was a racist, was my reason. I don't know if she ever told the doc or not.

[MrScorpio]

16. Your IRL name wouldn't be Navin R. Johnson, would it? nt

[Bay Boy]

19. I know the movie...

...and it's a favorite. I suppose I even know the specific line that you are thinking of.

[lamp_shade]

20. ^^^ hehehehehe

[Ian David]

61. I was thinking maybe his name was Mr. Ayak. n/t

[Pretzel_Warrior]

22. yeah. but yours is because you had your dick out

But seriously, WTF? I think you have some serious issues if you want to say your experiences are similar to that of a black man in this country.

Oh, and I'm also a white male. You are full of shit, cracker.

[Skittles]

35. STOP IT PRETZEL_WARRIOR

[kestrel91316]

57. I approve of this response.

[OneGrassRoot]

62. Now I'm in love with you. n/t

[1StrongBlackMan]

70. That comment ...

(to me) is no different than the posters that argue against the existence of white priviledge by citing to JZ or Oprah and then go on to tell about their poverty.

I generally look past their disingenuous crap.

[valerief]

26. You've wandered onto the wrong websites, too. nt

[Earth_First]

27. What.The.Shit.

You serious, Clark?

[Gormy Cuss]

29. BFD.

I'm a white woman and have been followed in stores. Never when I was dressed for my white collar job, though. My African-American coworkers couldn't say the same -- didn't matter how they were dressed.

You might have the cash but you can't cash in your face.

[Tarheel_Dem]

30. Uuuggghhh!

[uppityperson]

34. Decisions, decisions. What to do? Not reply, let it sink into oblivion where it belongs or reply so

others can see how absurd it is? Reply. W.T.F.

Edited to add, I've been followed also, middle aged white woman. Have you ever been mistaken for a waiter?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/110212580
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/19/obama-mistaken-for-waiter_n_3625289.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000009

Obama Mistaken For Waiter, Asked To Fetch Drink At 2003 Party

The Huffington Post | By Nick Wing Posted: 07/19/2013 5:16 pm EDT | Updated: 07/19/2013 5:43 pm


In the midst of his impromptu speech on Friday about the Trayvon Martin case and broader issues of race in the nation, President Barack Obama recalled his own past encounters with racial bias and profiling. Long before he had a Secret Service detail to shadow him, the president remembered, he was followed as he perused department stores. His remarks led Katie Rosman of the Wall Street Journal to recall an occasion when Obama was mistaken for a waiter at a swanky party in 2003.

Then a little-known Illinois state senator who'd only recently embarked on a U.S. Senate campaign, Obama had looked out of place at the gathering of prominent journalists, Rosman wrote in 2008, noting that he was "one of a few black people in attendance."

Rosman approached Obama and spoke with him for a while about his political career, not knowing that the man would one day go on to win his Senate election and eventually his race for the nation's highest office. She said what struck her most, however, was what a fellow party-goer told her after her conversation with Obama:

But what I will always remember is as I was leaving that party in 2003, I was approached by another guest, an established author. He asked about the man I had been talking to. Sheepishly he told me he didn’t know that Obama was a guest at the party, and had asked him to fetch him a drink. In less than six years, Obama has gone from being mistaken for a waiter among the New York media elite, to the president-elect.

What a country.

[Kingofalldems]

38. I love that story.

[RevStPatrick]

39. Yeah, you know what? Me too.

And I'm also a white guy.
Actually, with me, since I live in the city and don't drive and there are lots of young women in my neighborhood, it's more like if I'm walking behind a young woman, particularly at night (and I tend to walk really fast), they get nervous as I come up behind them. I've learned over the years to shuffle my feet noisily, or cough and give them plenty of room. It doesn't take much out of my day to do that.

And you know what?
It ain't shit compared to, oh let's say my neighbor who gets stopped and frisked once a month or so.
Simply because he's black and is a musician, so he tends to come home late at night a lot.
Stopped and frisked once a month or so.
For his entire life.
He's about 40, and a graduate from Juilliard.
Once a month for 25 years.
He's been stop and frisked about 300 times.
I've been stop and frisked zero times.

Here's another one - a few weeks ago, another black dude came to my house one afternoon to hang out and I wasn't home yet. He's a middle aged guy, actually, he looks a lot like our Mr. Scorpio. He was in the military, is highly educated and articulate and has never hurt a fly. While he was waiting for me, he decided to hang out in the shade across the street from my house and have a smoke.

When I got there, he was chatting with 3 guys who I didn't know, who I think worked in the building across the street. My friend said "There's RevStPatrick!" (and he used my last name) He's the guy with all the great musical instruments, yadda yadda yadda..." I was a little annoyed with my friend, because I don't really want strangers to know my name and what I've got in my house. But they were 3 pasty white nerdy-looking guys, so I figured I had nothing to worry about. We went inside and hung out and I got over it real fast.

Then the other day, I read this piece, by Questlove:

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2013/07/questlove-trayvon-martin-and-i-aint-shit.html

I almost started crying, because it gave me a little insight into why my friend said what he said to those strangers, and my reaction to it.

Middle-aged black guy is standing in an unusual spot having a cigarette.
Strangers come outside and wonder what he's doing there.
I think he felt he had to come clean, make it seem like he belonged there, had to have someone "vouch" for him, even if it was pre-emptive.

It didn't really occur to me until I read the Questlove piece. BECAUSE I'VE NEVER HAD TO DEAL WITH THAT!

And I wondered - it was 3 pasty-white nerdy dudes that he was talking to, and I was a little annoyed but as I said above "I figured I had nothing to worry about." What if he had been talking to 3 Trayvon-looking kids? Would I have reacted the same way? Would I have been more than "a little annoyed"?

I don't know, and that bothers the fuck out of me. I don't know what kind of societal-conditioning would have kicked in. I know myself pretty well, but I'm not willing to make a blanket statement that my reaction would not have been different. Again, that bothers me. Badly.

That's my two cents, and it's not even worth that much...

[Ruby the Liberal]

54. Wow - that Questlove piece was a powerful read.

Thank you for linking it.

[gollygee]

73. I hope the OP reads this

You make the point well.

[Robb]

41. Yeah, but he was talking about strangers doing it.

[MerryBlooms]

42. Um... so you're a creepy white guy?

Given that fact, you still have no clue what a man of color faces daily.
You're stuck dealing with your creepiness and no one to blame but yourself. tsk.

[Vattel]

44. Seriously dude, racism is a horror

and anglos are not the victims.

[Deuce]

46. If you are a "white guy" and women lock their doors when you approach them, then...

I would probably be reaching under my car seat.

[Igel]

50. Meh.

So have I. I looked remarkably drug-culture-ish as a kid. Far too many Black Sabbath t-shirts, ratty jeans, long hair, pale, skinny. It masked my underlying geekiness and social awkwardness. Never used. At that point, even alcohol.

Usually a friend would point out to me when a clerk was trailing behind us. "They're following us." I'd look around and shrug. Now, it didn't happen all that often. But enough to annoy my friends. Unless they kicked us out or called the cops I couldn't care less, and neither ever happened. On the other hand, when I needed help it was handy--there'd be somebody nearby who knew exactly what I was looking at. Not like today when I'm older and ignored.

Also had the odd luck of going to drop off a resume many years later and filling out a job application, just to have the receptionist look at me strangely. "Are you *sure* you want to apply?" She kept asking that as I worked on the application. She asked me one more time as I handed it in and looked around. So I looked around. It was a large open office with partitions. You could see pretty much everbody, including management in glassed in offices. I was the only white in the place. Everybody else--obviously a freak statistical accident--was black. Odd thing was, the area wasn't majority black, so there was some definite hiring preferences in place. Or the boss had 30 or 40 family members. If I remember correctly, it would have been a good fit for my experience and only two blocks from where I lived. Corinth over to Sawtelle, between Santa Monica and Olympic.

Then there was the strange coversation I had with my boss--where I was hired, eventually, after being ignored at the place in the last paragraph. We were off at a trade show and had little choice but to socialize. He said that he'd wanted to hire a Chinese. He was Chinese. Said Chinese worked hard and were smart, not like whites who were stupid and lazy. They held off offering me the job for weeks, waiting for somebody Chinese to apply. Finally agreed to me because at least I wasn't black. Said he turned out to be glad they hired me after all, I was a "credit to my race". He wasn't so glad a few months later when I handed the owner evidence he was embezzling. She ignored me, too. A year later the place went belly up and he was gone with a few hundred thousand dollars in addition to his generous salary.

Lots of other weirdnesses. Age, sex, race. Some hurt economically. Some were entertaining at the time. Now when a kid tries to offend me by calling me a racist or some name, my response is to guffaw. If they're adult and racist to me, I tell them, "That's mighty white of you." They really have no idea how to handle it.

[mwrguy]

52. That totally relieves you of your white male privilege

:|

[Ian David]

58. You must be one scary looking dude. Have you thought of hiring yourself out as a movie extra? n/t

[Douglas Carpenter]

60. I remember once traveling cross country with my African-American friend Eugene

Now Eugene was about as unintimidating as anyone could be. Hell, I could have probably beaten Eugene up and robbed him. Yet, I noticed over and over again when stopping in stores, gas stations, even major tourist sites like at Yosemite - lots and lots of people acting nervous or suddenly glancing away when we walked in or appeared on the scene. Since I had never experienced anything that repetitive before - I can only assume it was not me - but Eugene they were reacting to. And for him - this was just plain normal. It started to really bother me after a couple days of it - and I made a comment to Eugene about how ignorant people are - He was actually very tolerant and said, "Well a lot of this is just one big misunderstanding."

So, yes on my own I have had an occasion or two discovered I was being watched suspiciously - but to compare that to the situation of African -Americans or other peoples of color is ridiculous. Imagine what it would do to your self-esteem if you knew that a significant increased presence of your kind in most neighborhoods would mean that property prices would likely fall.

[WilliamPitt]

64. TREMENDOUS Fail.

One for the books.

[Sheldon Cooper]

65. One thing you can be sure of is that you were NOT followed because

you're white. Unlike Mr. Obama. So, it must have been something else. Do you have any suggestions, or are you just hoping to have the dumbest OP of the year?

[Tien1985]

66. I can't believe

DU even allows racist crap like this to stand. Just disgusting.

[Matariki]

68. +1

makes me long for the days of moderators sometimes.

[Douglas Carpenter]

69. I guess that at least half of white Americans believe that racism means pre-civil right movement

Jim Crow segregation or Ku Klux Klan, Mississippi Burning kind of stuff that everyone knows ended long ago. Since they are not seeing that and they heard about all this Affirmative Action stuff - They actually believe there is little racism around any more and because of Affirmative Action it is the downtrodden working class white man who is more hard done by. These are pretty commonly held notions. Since they are not consciously hating anyone specifically because they are black - they don't perceive their attitudes as racist at all.

[Ruby the Liberal]

72. Yup. This. nt

[Quantess]

74. You've been followed in stores... with a cell phone camera

and are now featured on People of Walmart.
Congratulations, you're a star!

[Scurrilous]

75. So, I've had stores lock their doors as I've approached them and women follow me in cars.

Closing time/convoy!!