Is obesity ever a person's fault

[nobodyspecial]

linked to what they opt to buy and put in their mouths and their lack of exercise?

[FreeState]

1. yes and no

It depends on the person.

[NaturalHigh]

2. I'm pretty sure it's my fault that I'm fat.

Why do you ask?

[brewens]

16. Mine is. I know that I'd be old and cranky so I eat to much to be fat. The jolly

balances out the crankiness

[WinkyDink]

72. Same here! But I've just turned over a "very low sodium" leaf ( I LOVE salt!), so it's a start.

At least I'm now scared of chips!

[Warpy]

3. Of course it is. Most extreme cases are an example of that.

However, "overweight" can't be, there are too many other things going on. Considering all the fat shaming in this country, who would choose to put on a single extra ounce if they could control it?

Also, with increasing poverty in this country, "what they opt to buy" is getting incredibly restricted.

[southernyankeebelle]

56. You have made a very good observation. I have been fat all my life. I never liked being

fat. I even had that real serious surgery back in 75 to lose weight. It worked pretty well til I hit 50 and it went downhill after that. But I own my fatiness. I can't afford to always buy the healthy foods. But I also don't like greens much. I very seldom eat fried foods. But I do hate the fat shaming. I think people should be ashamed of themselves. Sometimes people are fat for many reason and it isn't just for eating.

[LeftofObama]

4. Not always. n/t

[eShirl]

5. as much as alcoholism is an alcoholic's fault... n/t

[nobodyspecial]

9. So everyone who is fat

is just like an alcoholic? And don't alcoholics ultimately have some choice over how they live?

[Marrah_G]

22. Do you feel better now?

[arely staircase]

25. nobody ever sets out to become an alcoholic or a fat person

like I said, I changed my lifestyle and lost a lot of weight. but to assume everyone who is overweight or has a drinking problem suffers from a character deficiency is just plain wrong. I get where you are coming from in that some people take it too far in the other direction and want to lay the blame at the feet of mcdonalds or coca cola or whatever. so I get that. but losing weight or controlling one's drinking can be very, very difficult for many.

[Red State Rebel]

149. The real answer from a food addict.....

It is a true addiction and one that has to be fought constantly. When an alcoholic goes into rehab or quits, he can get through his days and nights without seeing or dealing with alcohol. Not so with a food addict. You HAVE to eat to live so you have to battle your addiction constantly.

Can you imagine an alcoholic trying to quit if he had to take a tablespoon of booze 3 times a day? To be constantly reminded of your addiction while you are not supposed to give in to it is torture.

I had weight loss surgery 7 years ago (duodenal switch) and after losing 130 lbs. I still deal with the addiction to food. I've been able to keep within 15 - 20 lbs. of my goal weight because my surgery is still working, but it isn't always easy.

Nobody likes to be fat or obese. I hated it and I hid from the world as much as possible. The biggest fear I had was that some day I would be in the news as one of those people who has to be cut out of their house when they die or go to the hospital.

I thank God every day for my surgery and if I had to go back and have it every single year to maintain the change it has brought to my life I would do it in a heartbeat. My heart still breaks for obese people who don't have the choice or the ability to have surgery and live with the deadly addiction to food.

[Chemisse]

155. You make a really good point about having to eat and how hard that is.

It was so hard for me to quit smoking, but now that I have done it, I can just stay away from cigarettes.

But I still have to eat food, making beating the food addiction so much harder to beat.

[liberal_at_heart]

159. not only do you have to eat, but you have eat carbohydrates to survive.

The very thing that many of us are addicted to. True, if you have your addiction under control you can choose a fruit salad over a candybar, but even something as simple as a piece of bread even if it is whole grain can trigger a sugar craving. People don't realize how difficult it is.

[Pelican]

122. So... all of it?

[NYC_SKP]

6. A ten year old child is not to blame.

A twenty year old who lives in a community of obese folks is still somewhat a victim of their society and his or her ignorance.

As one gets older, they become more to blame, but let's never forget how little we understand about the chemicals in the foods we eat.

Perhaps it's harder to change our bodies as we get older.

[nessa]

81. Certainly not with children. DNA and what they are taught. Our pediatrician told me ...

I have never treated an obese child who did not have at least one obese parent.

[nessa]

82. and if it's not an obese child's fault, does it become their fault on their 18th birthday. (nt)

/

[blueamy66]

134. Good question

nt

[arely staircase]

7. in my case it was

I cut out processed sugars and flour and started riding a bike for at least an hour 5 times a week. it is hard to make those lifestyle changes but it is possible.

[nobodyspecial]

11. Thank you for your honesty

and congratulations on your change in lifestyle. I'm sure you feel like a new person.

[Tien1985]

8. Is this

Argue about stupid crap on DU week?

I must have missed the memo.

[nobodyspecial]

10. I don't see it as a stupid argument

Everyone is not a victim.

[BainsBane]

12. You appear determined to change that

[siligut]

59. Was there a memo?

It would be nice if stupid crap on the Internet was organized, but I don't believe it ever is or ever will be.

[Tien1985]

65. You're right of course

But usually DU isn't so full of it.

It's been "pitbulls and teen sex and obesity, oh my!"

I'm kind of wishing the some congressman will text someone inappropriate pictures just to get us all on the same page again.

[siligut]

79. Spring is in the air

Congressmen and inappropriate texts can't be too far behind.

[lpbk2713]

13. I'm probably 15 lbs overweight for my frame.

Ever since I retired I don't do much of anything strenuous.

So yes, in my case I would have to say my condition is clearly my fault.

[Hekate]

71. Good grief -- you are scarcely very overweight --

-- much less "obese." Weight Watchers would barely even want to talk to you (I'm a life member) -- I think they'll help a person lose 10 pounds, but only if they determine via height and weight charts that you are indeed 10 pounds past optimal.

Count yourself lucky indeed. Small modifications in lifestyle will make the difference for you.

[REP]

14. How intellectually incapacitated must one be before it's considered a disability?

Somedays it's hard to determine what's posted as a result of just sheer stupidity.

[nobodyspecial]

15. Wow

What an amazingly clever insult. You must be very proud of yourself.

[Marrah_G]

24. Well, posting flamebait shit is your CHOICE

Nobody is making you type insulting shit.

[MattBaggins]

68. Like mama always said

if the shoe fits get out of the kitchen

[timdog44]

17. Just went through

a long thread on this subject that was entered as the "7 most obese states". http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022906911

One person put it very aptly. http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=2908961

I suggest you all go over and read the entire thread and then the post just above by SwedeAtlanta.

[Butterbean]

18. Yes. The first year of my marriage I stopped my eating disorder.

Because I wasn't barfing up everything I ate, I gained almost 60 lbs.. So yes. My weight gain is my fault. There you go.

[nobodyspecial]

19. I am glad you have overcome your eating disorder.

I wish you continued good health.

[Butterbean]

23. Thank you, but I haven't. The weight gain made me freak out

so I went right back to it. "Don't be fat because you're worthless if you're fat" has been very very successfully burned into my brain from a young age. That was courtesy of my parents, though, not "society."

*shrug* It is what it is. Me and my body have never been friends. At any rate, my metabolism is totally screwed from 20+ years of an eating disorder, so truth be told I have no idea if "eating right and exercising" will ever be enough to offset the damage done by that one little year of being a sane person. Ironic, huh?

[digonswine]

51. This sounds like a major problem-

your body adapts to what you do to it.
My wife was (what appears to be) like you-before me, of course!
After finally dialing in the correct amount of prozac-she is a happy person. Without it-she would be dead-for sure.
I find it hard to think that your metabolism is permanently harmed. Please seek help. The drugs can work wonders-it has with me.
I used to look on those needing help as being mentally weaker than myself--then, I grew up and realized that not everyone shares the same brain chemistry.

[Butterbean]

144. I have been on the med merry go 'round since college.

I agree, not everyone has the same brain chemistry, it is a complex thing. I'm on a great med cocktail now, which means that aside from the whole eating disorder thing, I'm actually happy most of the time. I know that sounds asinine, but in my brain I can compartmentalize. Anyway, yes, better living through chemistry all the way.

[laundry_queen]

100. Boy, don't I know that message

My parents were the same way. Fat people were lower than dirt - mental defectives, lazy slobs with no self worth and no self control - completely unworthy of any kind of love. My mom used to always say, "aren't you GLAD you have a skinny mom? Wouldn't it be horrible to have a FAT mom like *insert name of my friend here*" I remember feeling sorry for my friends who had fat moms, after all, THOSE moms weren't loved as much as MY mom was. Besides, all their husbands couldn't wait to leave them, right?

Yep, fat people were scum in my parents' house.

Now that I'm obese, they DO treat me like 'less than'. It's soul destroying when it's your own parents. My parents don't even have any pictures of 'fat' me, just my skinny teen pictures all over the house. Like I ceased to exist when I gained weight. I'm doubly blessed in that I have a physical condition that makes it more difficult for me to lose weight AND I have this stupid emotional crap with regards to my parents.

Anyway, yeah, it's a complex issue. Fat shaming whether it's from DU or from your own parents does shit all to solve it.

[JNelson6563]

133. Laundry Queen...

Hugs & encouragement.

[Butterbean]

142. Huge hugs to you. I can relate.

My mom put me on a diet when I was 9. That was pretty awesome. Mom and dad made fat jokes regularly in my house, all the time. Being fat was the ultimate shame. I remember her lamenting how slim I "used to be" when I was 10. Nah, that wasn't damaging to my psyche at all....

[October]

129. N.E.D.A. can help

Please contact the National Eating Disorder Association. They can help.

neda.org

You need support and now!

You cannot overcome this on your own.

Someone very close to me tried and failed - and finally sought real help. She is doing so well!!!

People here do not seem to understand the severity of eating disorders, so I urge you to contact NEDA.

Sending love and angels your way. Recovery and happiness is possible. Start by reading "Life with Ed."

[Butterbean]

143. Thanks. It's been so long that I sort of have accepted it as just part of who I am.

I'll look into NEDA, and check out that book. I appreciate it.

[Capt.Rocky300]

20. Not necessarily.........

....I have fought to control my weight for years. Despite becoming educated about food, portion size and exercise and applying what I'd learned with the help of a fitness coach, the results were disappointing. The old calories in, calories out doesn't apply to my metabolism. And no, I don't have a thyroid issue. On one end of the spectrum I've been a vegetarian, on the other, an Atkins dieter. I finally decided to seek professional help from a bariatric M.D.. He has me eating more protein and getting my carbs from green vegetables, much like Atkins but without as much fat. I no longer eat wheat products (damn, I miss spaghetti and garlic bread) or refined sugar. I even limit my intake of fruit to just a few berries and other non-tropical varieties. It has been almost a year and I've lost a net of 22 pounds. I don't cheat, I try to do the resistance training as he ordered but injuries have held me back. So, in the end, it is working but very slowly, and I feel better with more energy. The fact is I've had the resources to fight this with education and professional help. Not everyone is so lucky.

[Marrah_G]

21. Posts like this are flamebait

Just more picking on people who are already picked on by society.

[nobodyspecial]

32. Perhaps not everyone shares your opinion

Like those who posted their comments on this thread with no mention of being picked on. I guess they are wrong.

[Marrah_G]

35. Must make you feel wonderfully superior!

[nobodyspecial]

38. No, it doesn't

I'm just pointing out that some people can have this discussion without feeling the need to attack. I picked on no one on this thread. I would hope that the courtesy would be returned. Asking a question is NOT a broad-brushed attack, no matter what you opt to read into it.

[datasuspect]

26. who says being obese is a bad thing?

i'm a fatbuddy and i love mah big belly.

[nobodyspecial]

33. If you are healthy and not experiencing any difficulties

I am very happy for you and proud of your self-confidence.

[treestar]

27. Not always

Anti-depressant medications have an effect, along with genes, age.

I know for certain I eat less than I did when younger, but still weigh more. Age and anti-depressants.

I exercise pretty regularly, too.

So it is not that simple.

[MFM008]

29. bingo.

me to.

[nobodyspecial]

31. I found this an interesting read. Maybe it would help.

http://www.prevention.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-tips/metabolism-miracle-women-over-40?cm_mmc=Facebook-_-Prevention-_-weightloss-weightlosstips-_-TheMetabolismMiracleForWomenOver40

[grilled onions]

28. I Am Obese

I have been for many years. I do like food but I also cannot run. I cannot walk but a few feet with a walker. I take meds like prednisone which not only hold in the weight but slow down the metabolism. I can eat the same amount of calories as another. They can lose weight and I can gain it. It is very difficult to try and be healthy when exercise is out. I sleep poorly which some say is also a weight gain factor. Not making excuses. I also am supposed to eat(if it's but a cracker) when I take pills at night. I perhaps could focus more if health was better and pain would go away but it is indeed a vicious circle. For those who feel it is all a persons fault I say "oh to be in my shoes". I say good for you for those who can jog,ride a bike or swim. But I wish some would have just a bit of understanding for many of us would rather not be in our own shoes!

[nobodyspecial]

30. I'm sorry for the medical conditions you face.

I hope you get the help you need to deal with all of your issues.

[MFM008]

40. me to!

[Morning Dew]

34. I wish we still had unrec.

and I hated unrec.

[Coyote_Bandit]

36. Sometimes

But not always.

In an ideal world it is a simple mathematical calories in versus calories out issue.

In reality that issue is complicated by many other related issues. Not everyone has he $$$ to obtain healhy filling nutritious meals. In some parts of our nation fresh foods are far more abundant and affordable than in others. Some lack food preparation skills. Many are ignorant of basic health and nutrition information - and many others have a very real financial interest in keeping them ignorant and or confused. The climate in much of the nation is such that i is impossible to get adequate exercise without access to indoor facilities and equipment - something many cannot afford. And yes some have hormonal and genetic factors that do predispose them to weight related health challenges.

IMHO it is overly simplistic to make obesity about nothng more calories in versus calories out.

[love_katz]

37. How much good does shaming and blaming do?

When it comes to improving our health, whether the need is to quit smoking, lose weight, improve diet, increase exercise, or make any other needed change, I have never seen blaming and shaming be of real help, at least not for long term lasting change.

[fasttense]

127. I recently quit smoking

and all the shaming by friends and family did not make me want to quit. In fact, just the opposite. I would have quit a whole lot sooner if these people had not constantly bugged me about it.

Now I've gained 10 lbs on top of the 10 lbs over I was, so, now they are bugging me about my weight. Even my 150 lb overweight mother commented on how fat I was.

I think I'll go have a slice of chocolate cake.

[love_katz]

147. LOLLOLLOL

I have never found being shamed or blamed worked very well as a long-term motivator. Often, that approach has the opposite effect.

Enjoy the chocolate cake.

Wishing you the best of luck with quitting smoking.

[tavernier]

39. Oh ... Sigh... Where to start?

My grandmother's family pics from four generations ago all look like Circus People: fat and fatter. And these were ppl living in Europe during all the wars. I inherited a mix of genes so I can usually stay under 200 lbs. with an active lifestyle and much attention to diet. Still, a bulldog will never be a chihuahua.

[nobodyspecial]

45. I have the same issue with bad genes

I come from a long line of obese people with multiple weight-related issues like diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. I just keep reminding myself that genetics is not destiny and I have to work harder at it than most, some even in my own family who take after the other side of genetically predisposed thin people. I will never be skinny, but I can be healthy.

[MattBaggins]

70. You want a cookie now?

[tavernier]

77. Yeah, sure

But lobster and champagne in a size ten is much more fun. I will never be a size one but I have learned the value of the word "Choices". It is embroidered on my pillow. 😘

[Cirque du So-What]

41. Have you eaten today?

You seem a little cranky.

[nobodyspecial]

48. Why, yes, I have

Mostly unprocessed protein, veggies and a fruit. I find eating whole foods about six times a day really helps me control my appetite and keep my insulin at an even keel. And you?

[Cirque du So-What]

50. I'm too busy

overthinking things to eat.

[Arcanetrance]

42. My biggest objection to some of these over weight conversations

Is that some people are considered overweight by doctors but really aren't. I'm naturally built large I look like a pro football players I exercise I eat healthy and lift weights but the doctor says by his charts I should be one hundred pounds lighter. But if I were to lose that weight I'd look anorexic. But per your question is it ever anyone's fault they are obese I think yes and no obesity can create a vicious cycle. One doesn't watch their eating and puts on weight and society makes them feel bad for it so they binge eat to release endorphins and make themselves feel better.

[nobodyspecial]

49. BMI is a mess

Have your body composition analyzed with a professional using calipers. It is a much more accurate picture of your body. Even people who are within ideal weight carry too much fat. Waist to hip ratio also is a good indicator.

[Lady Freedom Returns]

43. That is a toss up question.

I have seen people that have been on the streets for a good time that never really got enough calories one needs to be healthy. They walk all over and yet they are heavy set.

Then I have seen people that are in a good job, have a car, no real exercise, and eats a ton of junk food, yet skinny as a rail.

Then I have seen the stereotypes play out too.

The ages were varied.

It is something that scientific study will have to work on some more to figure out all the quarks.

[Cleita]

44. In my case, yes, and every time I gain weight it's directly

because of my sweet tooth and lack of exercise. When I cut out the sugar calories and exercise, I lose weight. But I'm not going to judge others on my own personal experience. I know there are a variety of reasons for obesity other than bad eating and exercise habits. It's just that I know a lot of obesity can be reversed with life style changes, not all of them.

[nobodyspecial]

47. Thank you for your honest response.

Like you, I have to work at staying healthy. If no one is responsible for their weight gain, I think it devalues all of the hard work people put in to eat right and exercise regularly.

The question was not posted as a judgement. And, yes, there a many contributing factors as posted by some in this thread. It is a complex issue, but I think we also need to acknowledge that some people have some control in their own lives.

[southernyankeebelle]

58. I agree with you. Plus I have to say am a stress eater, big time.

[liberal_at_heart]

75. addiction of any kind can take years or even decades to kick.

I've always wanted to cut down on how much sugar I ate but in times of stress that addiction always over ruled any concern for the harm it was doing me. I'm getting older now and know if I don't do something I will end up with diabetes although my sugar levels have always been fine I am worried about them getting out of control at some point. I think I'm finally at a point in my addiction where the desire to be healthy is starting to outweigh that overpowering need to have that chemical fix. I have been doing well for about two months now. I wish people who are not addicted to food would show more compassion and understanding, but when they have never gone through it themselves I guess they just don't know how hard it is.

[timdog44]

46. The problem with obesity

is the concomitant health issues that go along with being obese. Nobody chooses to be obese as a conscious thing. People choose not to be obese as a conscious thing. It is more difficult for some than for others. That is their cross to bear. People have to make a decision on whether they want health or not. Again more difficult to do for some than for others. Obesity is linked to what people put in their mouths and the decision not to be active. There of course are no absolutes. Medications can cause these things to be harder to do than otherwise. Metabolic disturbances play a part too.

[Uzair]

52. It always is

Insofar as much as you can place "blame" on what is generally a mental illness. Usually people stuff their faces because of other underlying issues, like depression. There's also the issues of people just having stressful, busy lives, and thus not really having the time or energy to make sure they take care of themselves as best as they ought to. It's much easier to order a pizza than to cook a healthy meal every night.

But if you're going to go strictly on calories in / calories out, then yes, it's always the obese person's fault. Simply taking in fewer calories than you burn will keep you from getting fat, period.

[Bay Boy]

106. I'm fat and now...

...I'm mentally ill too? This is going downhill fast.

[DesertFlower]

53. food can be an addiction just like

alcohol, drugs, gambling. my friend's husband is addicted to food. he's 65 and has been overweight his whole life. he has diabetes and has trouble walking and just had quadruple bypass. when we used to go out to eat he'd finish his food fast and then his fork would come over into my plate. his mother was very heavy and so was his brother. they both died from heart disease.

one of my sisters has struggled with weight all her life too. she'd go to the gym and then stop for a thick shake. now at age 58 her weight is under control. she doesn't eat as much but she does drink.

i put on some weight about 15 years ago -- not a lot but too much for my frame. before it got out of hand i joined weight watchers. i only needed to lose 10 lbs. it came off within 4-5 weeks. a few years ago i had my late husband follow weight watchers and he dropped 40 lbs. i followed it with him -- only wanted to lose 2-3 lbs. i lost 5.

[aristocles]

54. As with all these flame bait questions and issues posted here on DU

There are no correct answers or easy resolutions. In this particular context we are each unique. Some are obese becuase they lack the will to curb over-eating. Some are overweight because it's the side effect of a medication. Some are genetically pre-disposed to being overweight.

There are no correct answers to these questions. There is no correct point of view. Discussion is pointless.

Usually those who post such question betray a certain self-righteousness and not a small streak of fascism.

[Pholus]

62. +1 This. Read this, OP! nt

[Hekate]

93. Excellent answer for this particular flame bait

No one knows what is happening in another person's life or another person's body, often not even their own doctor. So very little is still known about brain chemistry.

What is evident, however, is how very very smug and self righteous some people can be. They themselves are perfect specimens -- all others just lack the willpower. They are a legend in their own minds.

Having read innumerable threads here over the years on this very subject, I have finally concluded that certain people will never learn until it happens to them. Not their kids. Not their spouses. Just themselves personally. And I hope it does.

[RedCappedBandit]

55. Ever? Of course.

Sometimes it happens accidentally.

Sometimes people knowingly love food and don't care. More power to them.

Some people actively choose to pursue weight gain, for whatever reason.

Some people have shit working against them.

But yes, many times people simply prefer eating whatever and whenever they want.

[quinnox]

57. oh hell yea, most of the time

I'm sick of political correctness overload where every one who is obese is treated like they didn't do a damn thing wrong to get to their condition. Maybe shoveling food and Twinkies in your mouth 24/7 makes you fat?

[ForgoTheConsequence]

60. It can be.

I was 5'8 225 when I graduated high school. When I entered the work force and took time to educate myself about real food and exercise the weight melted off. I'm now 5'8 155 and have been for about 10 years. I don't keep junk food in the house and I exercise. I know that's not an option for everyone but sometimes people are lazy and make poor decisions, I did.

[hughee99]

61. Yes, if they're republicans.

For Limbaugh and Christy (for example) it's their own fault.

[justanidea]

63. Yes for about 95% of people.

Tons of people like to blame genetics or some sort of imagined self diagnosed disease for their weight issues.

I used to be overweight. You know what I found fixes it? Eating less and moving more.

Eat below maintenance and go to the gym.

You'll lose weight. It isn't rocket science.

The problem with most people is they either

A. Try some new miracle diet for 2 weeks and if they don't look like a model by then they give up.

B. They consider ordering a Whopper Jr. instead of a Whopper and a Diet Coke instead of a regular a proper diet.

C. They consider 30 minutes walking on a treadmill exercise and proceed to reward themselves by eating 3 slices of cake.

The majority of overweight people have the power to fix it. They just lack the drive and determination. In other words: the lazy stereotype is correct.

[madmom]

103. My, aren't we the self righteous one?

[loyalsister]

145. "Eating less and moving more."

I had to take a medication that made it impossible. The side effects messed with my motor skills and made it difficult to walk. My choices were to eat more and move slowly to help slow down the absorption of the meds. Or not take the meds as prescribed. I was supposed to take it 4x a day. After I got fed up with the weight I had gained, I tried to reschedule meds so that I could function. but that didn't work out so well. I was having a lot of seizures and getting hurt when I had them.

They were controlling my seizures when I took them correctly, but I was able to convince my doc to change them. Not everyone is so lucky. I am on a different- regimen- so far so good. Now that I can eat normally and can exercise, I have started dropping some weight very slowly. But, I am at an age where it does not go easily.

Most people are not as lucky as I am. After what I have been through, I find it very disappointing when people who have no idea what it is like believe they have all the answers.

[liberal_at_heart]

64. partially. Prejudice and hate are also a person's fault.

Tell you what. I'll work on my sugar addiction if you'll work on your prejudice addiction.

[nobodyspecial]

94. Point out to me exactly where I been prejudiced.

Or where I personally have used hurtful words or shamed anyone on this thread. I'll wait....

[LAGC]

161. Your entire OP reeks of condescension and self-righteousness.

Your passive-aggressive "I have no problem losing weight, so why can't you?"

I notice every time you are called on it you don't respond.

Your whole goal was to drop a proverbial turd in the punch-bowl, and you succeeded.

Are you proud of yourself now?

[HockeyMom]

66. I am my husband's Scapegoat

"Your cooking makes me fat". It is easier to blame somebody else. My cooking? Then why do I weigh 100 lbs and you weigh 250 lbs? I only make your DINNERS, not how many breakfasts you eat, lunches, or what you SNACK on in between. I don't buy cookies, ice cream, candy, soda, etc. How can somebody ELSE stop you from buying that crap yourself? Yes, blame somebody else, but not YOURSELF for lack of self-control and being a couch potato, never moving for hours, and only getting up to get something TO EAT.

My fault? No, it's YOUR FAULT.

[Pholus]

67. I guess the question for YOU is.....is obesity ALWAYS a person's fault?

Your answer defines what this thread stands for... so go on!

[nobodyspecial]

89. No

I never said it was. In fact, if you look at my responses on this thread, I already have answered that question.

[Pholus]

90. Then the point of the OP was.... ?

You think not enough people blame themselves for their obesity problem?

[Rex]

141. Flamebait, just like others are saying.

He just said so.

[lunasun]

69. America is the land of the free. You are free to choose to consume any products you want to

Education on what is toxic and makes you fat
or what a sedentary lifestyle may show in research to result in
needs to be more available to children
bad habits learned in childhood set a pattern for adult life
Lack of true education is the main fault here and a food pyramid to follow not beholden to food manufacturers or associations I think but
if they know the truth and still do it, well...why?
Addiction at that point? can not stop?
Fat can be like a wall you build around to shield too so could be sometimes psychological reasons and the result of trauma so not their fault
Gluttony has always been around as a type of character trait so just a drive from inside with some maybe
but some just keep on all the way to 300 then 400 - with all types of illness pending death -what is up with that?
Hard to say what's going on in the head then at that point of obese( or stomach)......

[Apophis]

73. I'm sure most of the time it is.

[rrneck]

74. Yes.

We are all responsible for our actions. Assuming and living up to that responsibility is sometimes difficult or even impossible, but the responsibility remains. Given our culture of consumption and technologically induce lethargy, weight watching is difficult to do, but certainly not as difficult as standing up for social justice in 1920 Tupelo or 1938 Berlin.

In the interest of full disclosure I'm one of those people that could eat anything and not gain weight, so I cannot really empathize with those who are not blessed with a metabolism of a freight train. But I can sympathize. We live in a world that makes the notions of frugality and restraint seem like some sort of anti social disease. I don't think I have the right to look down my nose at people who take in more calories than they burn. There are just too many extenuating circumstances involved to pass moral judgement on someone because of their waistline. Big people have to listen to too much crap in our culture.

[blueamy66]

76. Yes

And their parents' fault for letting them eat crap, sit on their ass in front of the tv and not exercise.

[abelenkpe]

78. It's difficult for poor people

To afford to make the healthiest decisions. And kids? I don't think they are choosing to be obese.

[Marr]

80. It's almost always the fault of the obese individual, imho.

Yes, there are people with glandular problems-- but the majority of obese people I have known simply ate too much, and ate horrible foods. I was overweight myself for a long time, and found that it finally melted away when I started eating a healthy diet and reasonable portions.

[liberal_at_heart]

85. I think it would be cool if researchers could determine the catalyst that changes addiction

I have been addicted to sugar for many years now. There have been times when I wanted to stop but the addiction always won no matter how much I wanted to change. Now, my desire to be healthy is finally winning over the compulstion to eat. How is it that this time I am able to control it when so many other times I was not able to? There are many people who want to quit but can't. Researchers need to find out why.

[loyalsister]

83. Another question

Should this really be a moral issue? It's a health issue. How a person becomes obese is not relevant. The health of the person is what matters. Shaming and degrading does not encourage people who are looked down upon to care about their health.

[TDale313]

111. Great post. ITA. n/t

[Bettie]

84. Who cares whose "fault" it is?

The better question is this:

Why is it your job to care what body others choose to live in? Why are you entitled to judge the bodies of other people?

There are many, many people who don't fit the standard version of physical perfection and a very few who do.

Bodies come in many shapes and sizes and the most effective way to get a larger body is to diet over and over in hopes of attaining the perfection that we are all "supposed" to strive for via eating less and less.

I get so tired of people who think they are entitled to judge the bodies of others, as if current ideals of beauty are the only worth any person has.

My weight comes partly from genetics (I look just like my grandfather's sisters did at my age), partly from poor exercise habits (getting better at that), and partly from cyclical dieting over the course of many years. Though, truly, it is none of anyone's business but my own.

[Pholus]

88. Merely the need of some to feel superior to someone else.

From time to time you get these threads.

When I need a dose of reality about how much better Democrats are than Republicans when it comes to moral shaming of "acceptable" targets, I merely need to look in threads like this. Pops the old bubble *real* quick.

I guess we all get our jollies from finding something we personally do well that someone else doesn't and then try to break them for their faults. It's just the human need for moral superiority.

I'll admit something awful. When one of these jokers says something about obesity with the intent to shame, instead of flaming back I sometimes amuse myself by doing a quick Google search on their posting history. Almost invariably I quickly find that they are not the sort who are generally capable of making thoughtful contributions regardless of topic.

It's not positive I admit, but that does make *me* feel morally superior.

[Bettie]

91. I feel the same way

Though, I just think uncharitable thoughts. The Google search is a good one though!

I just get so tired of people discounting people as worthy human beings because of their weight.

[nobodyspecial]

95. Please point out to me where I was

"discounting people as worthy human beings because of their weight. "

[Pholus]

96. Who said it was you?

Your OP simply enabled a few others who were more direct. Scan around a bit. You'll find them.

[Bettie]

104. You posted an invitation for people to do so

And I think you knew that.

[BainsBane]

107. exactly

The thread has gone precisely as planned. They can't have overweight people thinking they are actual decent human beings who can walk on this earth without scorn.

[laundry_queen]

108. It's not the first time for that one either. nt

[nobodyspecial]

109. I'm responsible for what other people post?

I strongly disagree. I have been nothing but kind and supportive throughout this entire thread. Do you take responsibility for what other people post in your threads?

[Bettie]

110. Well then, perhaps you could explain the reason for your post?

Generally, when I start a post, I have a specific reason for it.

Was your point in posting this that you are always kind and supportive? I suspect not.

Please, enlighten me as to what you wanted from this other than a bunch of fatties saying "YES! It is all my fault; I'm a terrible person because I have more fat on my body than others do!"

The phrasing of the question is combative.

But, fine, I'm used to fat bashing on DU. We (the fatties) are more hated than tea party folk.

I normally don't even bother and am regretting that I did here.

[Pholus]

116. The motivation for the OP is the great unanswered question here.

So can you explain how your OP was "kind and supportive?"

To help you, I will quote your OP in its entirety:

"Is obesity ever a person's fault linked to what they opt to buy and put in their mouths and their lack of exercise?"

So, the words that seem to matter in that sentence:

"ever" -- seems to imply that everyone shirks your wisdom
"fault" -- yes, blame and shame involve fault, I know.
"opt to buy and put in their mouths" -- oh yes, a lack of self control.
"and their lack of exercise" -- and they are lazy too!

Go on. I can't wait for the nth dimentional twist you have to put in here to make this "kind and supportive!"

[Yo_Mama]

86. Of course

but it isn't always.

[LisaL]

87. It's a free country.

If somebody is obese, it's their business, not yours.

[cherokeeprogressive]

92. Well I have three things to blame for mine...

The Fork, the Spoon, and the Knife.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

97. I was yelled at as a child for

not eating. I am a picky eater and I have some MAJOR food allergies too.

I got sick of my battleax grandmother yelling at me to eat her awful boiled to death Southern foods. My mother ate raw onions, bell peppers and tomatoes, trying to tempt me. I refused and I'm allergic to them.

I was not fat when I was young. I am a few pounds overweight now in my 50s. I have had autoimmune thyroid disease since I was 11 years old. My mother had the same disease strike her at age 11. I eat less food than most people.

I was quite traumatized by the battles but I refused to eat too much. I told them to their faces I refused to eat too much and get sick to make them happy. That pissed them off.

I think I have a healthy relationship with food in spite of my bossy grandmother.

[demosincebirth]

98. Possibly eating habbits developed, growing up, watching our parents eat.

[quinnox]

99. seeing some of the fat and pudgy kids, I have a feeling it does run in families

When Mom and Dad are stuffing their faces, these kids learn from them.

In other words, it is not these kids fault they are fat, but the parents just set terrible examples.

[revolution breeze]

101. Yes and no

Hubby learned horrible eating habits as a child, eat fast and eat everything on your plate. Food or withholding of food was used as reward and punishment. Twenty two years in the Navy reinforced the eat fast, eat everything habit. He would often stand eating directly from the refrigerator, then deny he had eaten anything (as he stood there chewing). Thankfully, Overeaters Anonymous has saved his life, he is finally aware of everything he puts in his mouth. We are now in the process of undoing all the damage he has done to his body as he begins losing almost 200 excess pound.

[MrSlayer]

102. Of course.

It almost always is. Conditions that cause obesity aren't so prevalent that every fat guy you see is affected by one. Not even close.

[sorefeet]

105. Go look at pictures of crowds

of people, say pre 1960 and you see very few fat people. Just sayin

[Quantess]

112. People moved around more back then,

mostly just by doing chores (such as manual lawn mowing) and walking more,
and there was far less processed food.

People sat around on their butts a little less back then.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

113. why? would that help you feel morally superior for not being obese?

[tarheelsunc]

114. I'm fat because I eat fried/oily/sugary foods and don't move enough.

Sure I could blame "genetics", but in my case that's not the problem, it's that I'm eating garbage and not doing enough to eliminate it. I lost a lot of weight once before by eating slightly less garbage and moving slightly more, so it's not that I physically can't lose weight. I imagine this is true for half or more of obese people.

[nolabear]

115. "Fault"? As in "Flaw" or something to feel bad about? That's an external appraisal only.

Is there cause and effect? Yes. Is it always the same? No. Is it helpful to say it's someone's "fault" rather than there are reasons for it? No.

And it causes a lot of pain, a lot of shame, shuts off access to help, stops conversations and reaching out, and stops those who don't have the problem from taking a fair and helpful assessment of those who do.

[applegrove]

117. I'm obese and it is both my fault and the side effect from the drugs I am on for ptsd.

I keep trying to cut back, eat better. When I have dieted the scales don't really go down. So it is disappointing. But I need to keep at it. Afterall I quit drinking and smoking so I should be able to master this.

[LeftInTX]

118. I'm kinda thin and I blame it on genetics

I weighed an entire 92 pounds at my first OB appt. (I'm 5 feet)
I'm 56 and weigh 120, but have health problems which limit my activity and exercise.
If I was more active, I would easily be at 110.
I pretty much eat the same boring thing everyday.

[DJWBlue]

119. I was thin until two years. Then put on 80 pounds. Then I lost it. Funny thing happened though...

I'm in my forties and up until 2 or so years ago I was always thin, mainly because I starved myself (or was on some wacky diet) and worked out regularly. And then two years ago I started a business. Because of the long hours I didn't have time to work out and pretty much just ate what was convenient. I put on nearly 80 pounds in 7 months. I maintained that weight for over a year. 8 months ago I started running daily and went on Dr. Esselstyn's diet (the diet Bill Clinton followed after his heart attack on which he lost quite a bit of weight).Now I am within 10 pounds of my pre-gain weight.

Here is the funny thing: for most of my life I was very body conscious, always concerned about how I looked in (and out) of my clothes, whether I was considered attractive by others, etc. But after I gained the weight, I noticed an interesting side effect of the gain: I felt less stressed on a daily basis and I no longer cared so much if I didn't look as attractive as I otherwise could. In an odd way, gaining weight was like having a burden lifted off me. And for the fist time in my life I am dieting and exercising to help me want to maintain a healthy weight (and heart) rather than my appearance. When I think back on the experience, gaining 80 pounds was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

[liberal_at_heart]

120. that's been my experience too.

I was thin as a teen and got lots of attention from guys. Then after having kids, I gained weight. Because I was married, taking care of children, and overweight I no longer cared what other people thought of me. It was very freeing. Now that I am approaching 40 I want to have good health. Being overweight and getting older both have been blessings for me. I have way more important things to care about than what I look like or what other people think of me.

[DJWBlue]

121. I agree. Getting older has also been a blessing for me as well.

I was never good at being young when I was young. Now that I'm 46, I feel that I am great at being young, if that makes any sense.

[bike man]

123. Yes. nt

[Notafraidtoo]

124. Hardest thing i ever did in my life.

My parents fed me sugar and processed junk only growing up,by the time i could make my own food choices i had sugar addiction which by some studies have shown to be as bad as meth addiction.

Took me years to get to a normal weight and i still struggle with my addiction to sugar daily, i have never been a alcoholic but they say you are never cured well that is what its like for me,I have occasional binges but so far i have been able to resist the destructive cycle that i went through as a young man although it is not easy at all.

If you ever had a addiction to anything in your life gambling,alcohol,drugs etc. that took over your life and became all your brain thought about,you stopped caring about money your own health your job your future nothing else mattered but the next fix then you can understand obese people( some will deny but just like most addictions obese people have denial too)

If you haven't and are not empathetic you wont understand.


As far as exercise go's thats part of the destructive cycle of the addiction,alcoholics gamblers and drug addicts are not known for exercise either.

I am lucky enough to be able to battle it daily and am currently normal weight but statistic's show i am extremely rare and i know why my brain fights my willpower fiercely daily as if its my enemy. I doubt you understand cause if you did why would you ask this question count your self lucky enough to have a healthy brain not prone to such self destruction.

[KurtNYC]

125. You start this thread then YOU duck all responsibility. Classic. n/t

[still_one]

126. One thing. is certain the mass advertising of many food products to an

uninformed public is perhaps the biggest problem, where much of the information is less than honest

[Iggo]

128. Trash thread.

Why the fuck are you trying to start this fight?

[LanternWaste]

130. Is it in your fault fault in your case?

Is it in your fault fault in your case? Do you think you can validly extract and project that same causation onto everyone else?

[liberal N proud]

131. Mine is

I became sedentary and ate too many Whoppers, chocolate in the afternoon and 6 pack of coke everyday then some beer in the evening.

I have dig out from that hole now.

1 coke zero a day, 1 beer, no chocolate, no donuts and regular exercise.

[BanzaiBonnie]

132. I've read through the whole thread with interest

Words have meaning. Your wording of the initial question is interesting.

Fault can be a loaded, judgemental word. ~ a. A character weakness, especially a minor one.
b. Something that impairs or detracts from physical perfection; a defect. See Synonyms at blemish.
c. A mistake; an error.
d. A minor offense or misdeed.

If I were to ask the question, I would use the word responsibility in place of the word fault.

I believe my health is my responsibility.

[Sivafae]

135. Before I answer that question, i'm going to have a look

in my medicine cabinet. I have been on medications before that are KNOWN to cause the secretion of the hormone known to cause cravings for fatty sweet foods. The doctors knew this, but, um, forgot to tell me before I started taking it. Nice. 30 pounds in 2 months later, I have to buy a whole new wardrobe. Well now I am morbidly obese, oh boy, and all the physical ailments i had before are exacerbated by the weight gain. So if I want to go out an walk a mile, a mile (!), I have to live with the pain for a week. It is really heart breaking.

For me, I love my body and I like to use my body. I have ALWAYS been physically active, love to dance, play sports, landscape--dig holes in the dirt. Fun yummy stuff for me. Being physically active is soooo important to me. But now I have hip problems where just sitting next to someone on the bus that puts too much pressure on my hip can cause me weeks, even months of pain (on a scale of 1 to 10 of pain, 1 being lowest, I would say it is somewhere between a 6 and 8). This breaks my heart, truly.

[datasuspect]

137. is clickbait/flamebait guaranteed to raise people's hackles?

[Rex]

140. Nice shit stirring thread, I see it worked.

Do you give yourself gold stars when a poster answer back in an angry fashion? It must be so cool to be somebody special.

[cliffordu]

146. Can be, but what a dickheaded question.

And YOU knew that before this asinine OP.

I'll take the hit on this response, but really, a troll OP is a fucking troll is a fucking troll.

I'd ban you if I could

[Donald Ian Rankin]

148. Nearly, but not quite, always.

I am in equal parts amused and horrified by the predominance on DU of people who claim that obesity is not usually caused by eating too much and exercising too little - it makes it incredibly obvious why there is so much obesity in America today.

There *are* a very small number of people who become overweight wholly or partly due to factors beyond their control, but from the ration of people who claim to be one of them to people who claim not to be it's clear that most people who think they are actually aren't.

To be clear, there is nothing in any way immoral about eating a lot and not exercising much, and arguably nothing even unwise about it if the quality of life you gain from it outweighs the health issues - I'm mildly overweight, because I have a desk job and like crisps. But, unwise or immoral or otherwise, it *is* almost invariably caused almost solely by lifestyle.

[HappyMe]

150. I would say about 90% of the time

it's their own fault.

[CrispyQ]

151. When I went off birth control pills, I lost 35 pounds in two months.

It was amazing. I didn't exercise more, I didn't eat less. The weight fell off of me.

It's hard to eat healthy in this country. Good food is expensive & cooking takes time.

[noiretextatique]

152. your OP is a leading question

so stop pretending you didn't mean it or know it when you posted it. your leading question is designed to illicit certain responses, so the posts claiming this thread is flamebait are accurate.

In common law systems that rely on testimony by witnesses, a leading question or suggestive interrogation[1] is a question that suggests the particular answer or contains the information the examiner is looking to have confirmed. Their use is restricted in eliciting testimony in court, to reduce the ability of the examiner to direct or influence the evidence presented. Depending on the circumstances, leading questions can be objectionable or proper.

For example, this question is leading:

Were you at KC's bar on the night of July 15?
It suggests what location the witness visited on the night in question. The same question in a non-leading form would be:

Where were you on the night of July 15?
This form of question does not suggest to the witness the answer the examiner hopes to elicit. Leading questions might instead name a particular person rather than asking "who?", indicate a specific time rather than asking "when?", and so on.

Leading questions may often be answerable with a yes or no (though not all yes-no questions are leading). The propriety of leading questions generally depends on the relationship of the witness to the party conducting the examination. An examiner may generally ask leading questions of a hostile witness or on cross-examination (to elicit testimony which the witness might be reluctant to volunteer), but not on direct examination (to "coach" the witness to provide a particular answer).

Leading questions are distinct from loaded questions, which are objectionable because they contain implicit assumptions (such as "Have you stopped beating your wife?" indirectly asserting that the subject has beaten her at some point).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leading_question

[Nye Bevan]

153. I blame chocolate. For being delicious (nt)

[otohara]

158. It's The Sugar

me and hubby have a chocolate addiction, so I grab the one with the darkest chocolate and the least sugar the other day.

[MFM008]

154. this column is gaining comments

about as fast as I gain weight.....

[Manifestor_of_Light]

156. Thirty million people in the US have thyroid disease and may not know it.

Doctors are very good at dissing women with thyroid trouble. In med school they teach students that Armour Thyroid is not a good med ication. It's been on the market for over a hundred years.

I once shut up a board-certified endocrinologist at Diagnostic Clinic in Houston who wanted to put me on synthetic thyroid.

He said "Armour Thyroid is not consistent in the dosage."

I replied, "I read the label. It says, 'Biologically assayed, United States Pharmacopoiea."

He shut up.

More info: www.stopthethyroidmadness.com

http://thyroid.about.com

[riderinthestorm]

157. I dunno. Do monster doses of daily prednisone plus 3 other daily steroids for severe asthma count?

If today's weather conditions mitigate "exercise" and the asthma is horrifically severe (ie, I can only work 12 hours doing heavy labor at the farm vs my usual 18 hours) so I'm overweight is the weight gain still "my fault" because I have a health issue or is this "what I put in my mouth"? Let me reiterate, I exercise DAILY, 12 hours at least.




Can you clarify if I am "good fattie" because I have a medical excuse that my doctor and I have dealt with (daily), or a "bad fattie" because you want this to be simply about calories in/exercise out?

FWIW, my pulmonologist, allergy specialist, and personal physician would find your OP simplistic and flawed, as do I. The level of steroids I take means I'm typically holding 20 - 30 lbs of fluid at any given time. I "look" overweight for sure. But that simply means I can breathe. Daily. Do you understand? The weight gain means I can breathe and survive.

There are some medical conditions that defy easy judgements. My sister is a double kidney/liver transplant survivor. The meds for her transplant have caused her ENORMOUS weight gain - all of it approved and supervised by her first rate Stanford CA transplant team. She has a STRICTLY monitored diet but the drugs she's on are designed to facilitate fatty cell growth to ease her organ grafts. She eats 1200 calories/day but she takes meds that PACK on the pounds via other means.

Its impossible to judge folks. Your OP comes across as judgemental. YMMV.

[cynatnite]

160. Sometimes no...

In many circumstances it is linked to diet and lack of exercise.

I'm struggling with my weight as it is, but that's based on my own behavior.

My husband on the other hand is overweight, but it's not his fault. He injured his back several years ago. He also injured his knee and foot a few years ago. He has also had sinusitis problems for over 5 years as well. Doctors have tried steroids with him for each of these conditions. He was never an excessive eater because he is a truck driver. He knew that his sedentary lifestyle would cause issues for him and was careful of his diet. The steroids caused excessive weight gain and while he has lost some, we're not sure if he will ever be able to lose all.

I do think you have a simplistic view of the issue. The content of the food we eat now has significantly changed over the years. Most of our food now has corn syrup. Taking a look at the ingredients list over the last 30 years alone makes me wonder at how much damage our bodies have undergone and if we can ever truly recover from it.