God damn it. I have to help Newt tomorrow.

[Recursion]

I first met him back in the 90's. Unless he's figured out personal hygiene since then, he's going to stink up the whole room. And he's going to have his greasy paws all over one of my laptops which I will probably then have to wipe clean lest whatever thumb drive he uses is infected by whatever sick, sick porn he downloads.

Sometimes being a sysadmin isn't worth it.

[Motown_Johnny]

1. record it all

and I do mean all of it

[Recursion]

2. It's being webcast. I have to route those packets

My poor, innocent router has to send this out over the interwebz. Sigh.

[santamargarita]

3. If he stinks up the place, he's all Republican.

[Fire Walk With Me]

4. Where can you purchase enough glitter to beautify that bastard, on such short notice?

That's a trick question. No amount of glitter could possibly beautify Newt.

[Lint Head]

5. Reprogram some keys to type wrong alphas and signs. Then say sorry. Must be a system issue.

[Gorp]

6. "Well, dang. Somebody used a regular cable instead of a cross-over cable. Oops."