No. No. Just... no. Canned Scotch.

[Recursion]

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyle/2012/01/just-like-beer-scotch-gets-canned/

Just when the controversy over the banned FourLoko has died down, a beverage company has come out with straight Scotch in a can, just like soda pop.

Though there’s been no uproar so far, as was the case with the alcohol-caffeine combo FourLoko, Scottish Spirits’ “Scotch in a Can” is being marketed as a “distilled and matured in Scotland for a minimum of 3 years in oak casks.” It has notes of “honey, vanilla, butterscotch, apples and pears,” and a “hint of peat and smoke in the background,” as described on their site.

Each can contains about eight shots or 12 ounces of 80-proof Scotch. The cans are re-sealable, as the company does not endorse drinking a whole can in one sitting.

Monique Force, a spokesperson for Scottish Spirits Imports, says the product was created from “the need for convenience factor: people can take this boating, poolside, or to a football tailgating party without bringing a glass bottle.”

[phantom power]

1. the craft brewery canning trend is working out well enough

I was a can skeptic, but these days I kind of prefer it, when I can get it.

[cali]

28. Drink from the can

at least that's what cans of Heady Topper have printed on them.

[Recursion]

32. DC Brau's cans are pretty good, but they fail a lot

I'm sure they're working on that.

[Robb]

2. Just the thing for any well-stocked emergency kit.

[HappyMe]

3. Here's an abomination!

I don't think it will last long. I hope.

[Lionessa]

4. Many flasks are metal, so where's the problem.

Or is it that it makes 8+ servings look like one?

[Recursion]

5. It's a 3-year "single grain". We call that "swill".

"Single grain" is one of the more odious marketing tricks ever, because it looks like "single malt".

[Lionessa]

11. But what does that have to do with cans which seems to be what you're reffing in the OP?

[Recursion]

14. It's like boxed wine

There may be good boxed wines. I'll just never know.

[Lionessa]

16. So you're bitching without a clue? Thanks for fessing up.

[1StrongBlackMan]

27. I'm with you. n/t

[wryter2000]

43. That's what alarms me

I imagine with care and forethought, you could make a can that could hold Scotch, but can you imagine someone standing at a party with one of those in his hand? Ack!

[Junkdrawer]

6. The drink for those who don't fool themselves with "I'll just have one"...

A Raging Hangover in Every Can(tm)

[Autumn]

7. I can get on board with that. The can

Last edited Fri Feb 8, 2013, 05:14 PM - Edit history (1)

is re-sealable and it holds more than a flask. I would imagine the cans are recyclable too, better than glass and the plastic.

[House of Roberts]

8. There will be young people ending up with alcohol poisoning from chugging these.

Not a good idea.

[Junkdrawer]

10. Wrongful Death Lawsuits...

You betcha....

[jmowreader]

24. How many young people actually drink Scotch?

Young people "don't want to taste the alcohol," so they drink alcopops, Purple Jesus, garbage can punch, beer and other things that disguise the taste of ethanol. If someone invented a machine that got you instantly fucked up for two hours at the push of a button, every 21-to-30-year-old in America would buy one. The fact that three-year-old Scotch (how do you say 'white lightning' in Scottish?) now comes in cans doesn't change the fact it still tastes like Scotch.

[Recursion]

36. 3 year single-grain "Scotch" (*ahem*) would have to be for mixing, I think. I hope?

They even helpfully flavored it with vanilla

[EOTE]

25. Just how many ounces of Scotch can a young person chug?

I'd be surprised if there are many who could get through more than one, which is a little bit more than a typical sixer. And it's not like young people don't know what hard liquor is. I'd think it would be easier to chug a single 750ml bottle than a few of those cans.

[Junkdrawer]

38. $5 / can. Easily hidden and resold. A package traditionally used for chugging....

It's a liability disaster waiting to happen. I can't believe the company's attorneys are allowing this, much less state alcohol regulators.

[EOTE]

44. What's the difference between chugging 2 $5 cans or a $10 750?

Same price, same amount of alcohol, the only difference is metal vs. glass. I'd think it would be easier to chug a single bottle rather than two cans.

[EOTE]

48. Or, I see many cheap 355ml bottles.

Some around $5. I don't see why having that same 355ml in a can is any worse, just more environmentally friendly.

[wryter2000]

46. Welcome to DU

[Junkdrawer]

65. I just emailed the company's attorney (with a CC to our state's biggest product liability firm)...

RE: http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyle/2012/01/just-like-beer-scotch-gets-canned/

Dear Sir or Madam:

As the father of a college freshman, I am putting you on notice that the most likely result of your company's irresponsible marketing of 80 proof Scotch in 12 oz. traditionally chugged cans will be the wrongful deaths of more than a few young people in hazing ceremonies. The resultant lawsuits may well bankrupt your company.

I'm having a hard time believing you would OK such a product.

Please reconsider.

......

BTW: Welcome to DU

[Matariki]

9. Um, that's what hip flasks are for.

sheesh.

[Submariner]

12. It's about damn time for chrissakes

a can of scotch that will fit in my dashboard cup holder. That square bottle of Johnny Walker Red didn't fit.

[Ikonoklast]

31. You own the wrong car.

[yellowcanine]

13. Some things are just wrong and that is one. I predict this will be a marketing bust.

I refuse to let any canned Scotch cross my lips.

[Junkdrawer]

17. I predict 4 or 5 college freshmen will die of alcohol poisioning....

And their parents will wind up with the proceeds of the company's liquidation.

Corporate Darwinism.

[Maeve]

20. I tend to agree

A decent scotch, let alone a GOOD scotch, is meant to be sipped..enjoyed slowly; that's why shot glasses are so small (and some Scottish shot glasses are tiny) Cans are for chugging. The concepts are in opposition to each other.

Shoot, I'd rather not drink soda from a can given the choice.

[Union Scribe]

15. That's just not going to fit well in my paper bag. nt

[randome]

18. But...the colors are so pretty.

My brother gave me a bottle of Crown Royal for Christmas. That's 40 proof and I can barely down a few drops of that. I don't think 80 proof Scotch will ever cross my lips.

But even so, it does seem kind of sacrilegious to put Scotch in a can.

[EOTE]

29. I don't believe 40 proof can technically be called whisky.

I'm fairly sure that your Crown Royal is 80 proof, that's probably why it seems so potent. 40 proof is only slightly stronger than most schnaps.

[Recursion]

34. Bourbon has to be sold at 80 proof or above

Not sure what the appelation control on whiskey is in the US.

[EOTE]

47. In many countries it's also 80 proof.

And although I can't seem to find anything specifically about the U.S., 40 proof would seem to me to be well under any accepted minimum.

[Recursion]

49. I'm talking to the master distiller this weekend

I do the IT for George Washington's gristmill and distillery; he's the person who would know that.

[EOTE]

50. I'd be interested in hearing what he says.

If you wouldn't mind dropping me a PM, I'd like to know. Thanks.

[Recursion]

52. Will do (nt)

[randome]

42. Ah. My ignorance of drink manifests itself.

[jmowreader]

30. Crown Royal is 80 proof

A "proof" is one-half percent; both your Crown Royal and this too-young-to-drink Scotch are 40 percent alcohol by volume.

[Moondog]

33. I think if you

look closely at the label on the Crown Royal you'll find that it is 40% alcohol, which is roughly 80 proof, and not 40 proof. The 80 proof scotch will have just about the same alcohol content as the Crown Royal, although it may be expressed differently on the label. FWIW.

[randome]

45. Thanks for the corrections everyone. My education is sorely lacking.

And it will likely not go further in taste than an occasional glass of Sherry.

[pinboy3niner]

19. Damn! It's going to take me forever to get the ice cubes in.

[aquart]

37. They have trays that make long narrow "cubes" for water bottles.

The disgusting deed can be done.

[KansDem]

21. Man, I had the same reaction here as I had...

...to a scene I witnessed a couple of years ago!

I was at the liquor store and saw a man approaching the counter with a bottle of Macallan in one hand and a six-pack of Seven-Up in the other!

I wanted to shout, "You're not going to... You're not... You... Say it ain't so!!!"

[Recursion]

22. I once took my dad to Morton's for a steak

He ordered a filet.

Well done.

I hid my head in shame.

[Dreamer Tatum]

55. I was with someone who wanted a filet well done but became agitated

when told it would have to be butterflied.

Some people are dumb.

[Marr]

23. That's a lot of whiskey for one sitting.

And disgusting.

[wandy]

26. Do you have Jack Daniels in a can?

Well let 'em out!

Sorry.

[MichaelMcGuire]

57. Yes and its poisoned with coke

[wandy]

59. Please say this is photoshopped. Please. Even if ya gotta lie to me.

[MichaelMcGuire]

61. I've drank them, its just whisky and coke.

But I like mine without even water.

[MichaelMcGuire]

63. I've got a wee bit of JD hanging about the flat. Whisky time

[Recursion]

68. Mandrake, pour me a drink of pure grain alcohol and rainwater (nt)

[Junkdrawer]

69. That image haunted me the whole Bush Admin....

[MichaelMcGuire]

86. Single malts where its at!

[Recursion]

64. I'll put springwater or rainwater in a very good single malt

that's about it for me.

[wandy]

66. Ya know, I've heard some folk are so crass as to pore coke over Uncle Jack...

Mr McGuire, ya be a man after me own heart!

[MichaelMcGuire]

85. I tend to just give them a long good look of disapproval.

In which they look at me like I'm mad.

[Autumn]

83. Yuck. It is poisoned. Cola will ruin any whiskey

my Dad used to say " I can drink a quart of whiskey and a sip of coke and that damn cokes going to make me sick"

[aquart]

35. Dear God.

Someone is going to be hazed with that fucking thing.

[NightWatcher]

40. boating??? poolside??? Brown liquor on a hot day of boating or swimming

let me know how that works for ya

[Cleita]

41. Well, for those inclined to get blotto, it's a good idea. All you can do is

squash the can. A broken bottle can cause cuts for those too impaired to hang on to it.

[riqster]

51. Some things are just wrong

And this is one of them. Another is haggis turned into roller food at all-night motorway "restaurants".

Scotch in cans. Haggis roller food. The apocalypse is nigh.

[RebelOne]

53. No thank you. I drank Scotch many years ago.

Now I am just a wine drinker. And an alcohol-caffeine blend sounds lethal.

[Deep13]

54. Bring on the armageddon, for the end times are here. nt

[catchnrelease]

56. 3 years old

Oh the humanity!!

[Maeve]

72. there are some who insist the whisky should never be 'underage' for marriage

That is--never drink a scotch less than 18 years old (fine, if you can afford it!). Most will go along with a 12 year old as the least aged and in general, anything under 10 years in the cask is house brand quality.

Me? I'm a different kind of snob--I think a cheaper triple-distilled Irish whiskey beats an older scotch whisky every time...slainte!

[catchnrelease]

81. Truth be told

If I'm going to drink something, my favorite is Tyrconnell, a pure pot still Irish whiskey.

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

58. Having drank myself stupid with scotch last night. I agree :-P

[MichaelMcGuire]

60. I'll stick to my Aberlour A'bunadh

[guardian]

74. I'll have to try that one.

I tend to prefer the Highlands distilleries. My current favorite is


I drink it with just a touch of filtered spring water to open it up a bit.

[Initech]

62. Shotgun time!!!!

[randome]

67. To do it the justice it deserves, you need to use a straw.

[RZM]

70. This is the kind of thing that turns agnostics into atheists

What God could permit this . . . ?

[pa28]

71. Bad idea but I can think of one good use.

Since everybody seems to know an insufferable scotch snob it might be fun to replace their usual 12 year old single malt with the canned stuff.

After they've had a few of course.

[Taverner]

73. GAH!

[guardian]

75. So sad.

Comparing this to proper scotch is like comparing a Monet to chimpanzee fecal art.

“The proper drinking of Scotch whiskey is more than indulgence: it is a toast to civilization, a tribute to the continuity of culture, a manifesto of man’s determination to use the resources of nature to refresh mind and body and enjoy to the full the senses with which he has been endowed.”

- David Daiches 1969

[robertkdem1965_h89]

76. Oh man, that's just wrong.

I love Scotch, but not in a can. Yuck.

[shenmue]

77. What the... ?

Who permitted this crime?

[CrispyQ]

78. I'd try it!

Each can contains about eight shots or 12 ounces of 80-proof Scotch. The cans are re-sealable, as the company does not endorse drinking a whole can in one sitting.

[Fumesucker]

79. At last, something to mix with Jager in a can

[Recursion]

80. There is not a deep enough circle of hell

for that idea

[Sheldon Cooper]

82. At last!!!

I hate Scotch. This could only be an improvement.

[liberal_at_heart]

84. oh, yes, by all means let's make it more convienient for anybody drinking hard liquor by the lake or

football game.

[MichaelMcGuire]

87. I always thought a bottle was more convenient