Fox News to Shut Down for Routine Maintenance Monday Morning at 11:30

[babylonsister]

Fox News to Shut Down for Routine Maintenance Monday Morning at 11:30




NEW YORK —Fox News Channel announced today that it would shut down for what it called “routine maintenance” Monday morning at 11:30 E.T.

Fox News president Roger Ailes explained the timing of the shutdown, which will be the first in the history of the network: “We wanted to pick a time when we were positive nothing would be happening that our viewers would want to see.”

Mr. Ailes said that Fox had considered shutting down only once before, exactly four years earlier on January 20, 2009, and later regretted the decision to continue broadcasting that day: “It turned out that no Fox viewers wanted to watch TV that day. And I mean none.”

According to Mr. Ailes, for the twelve hours Fox News is off the air on Monday the network will broadcast a continuous photomontage of white people.

“Regular viewers of Fox probably won’t notice anything unusual,” he said.

After the routine maintenance is completed, Mr. Ailes said, Fox News will return to the air Tuesday morning with its regular broadcast schedule: “For Fox viewers, it will be like Monday never happened.”









http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/01/fox-news-to-shut-down-for-routine-maintenance-monday-morning-at-1130.html

[proud2BlibKansan]

1. LOL I love Andy.

[grantcart]

9. You knew it was Andy without even clicking.

[proud2BlibKansan]

13. Yep. I'm on his email list.

[Angry Dragon]

2. Fair and Unbalanced

[Plucketeer]

8. Fare un balanced

[Cirque du So-What]

3. Absolutely *nothing* of interest to FAUX viewers, eh?

Surely they have some filler for that time slot...guns being grabbed or somesuch? No missing white girls? Anything at all?

[demmiblue]

4. Lol!

[tblue]

5. Oh guy! I bought it.

Haha! You got me!

[babylonsister]

6. Hahaha!

I try.

[PatrynXX]

16. get goood enough

Fox News will buy it and shut off for 12 hours. lets see if any dopes at Fox News don't show up for work.

[tavernier]

7. Not true.

They are presently decorating the set with black crepe banners, loading the funereal music and covering the mirrors. The weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth will be awesome.

It's the only time in four years that I can't wait to tune in to Pox.

[southernyankeebelle]

10. Here I thought it was for mourning. To bad they aren't mourning Ailes.

[Wellstone ruled]

11. Oh Shit,going to have to add extra staff on Monday here in Udah.

With Fake News shut down,were going to extra busy with all the sheeple looking for something to entertain them selves. Hey this is good,we have been looking for some extra dollars in the till. Oh,forgot,probably a Gun and Ammo show taking place some where in town. What a life style!!!! Duh!!!

[littlemissmartypants]

12. What a lovely idea...

Fox News Channel announced today that it would shut down...

“Regular viewers of Fox probably won’t notice anything unusual,” he said.

This one not so much:

After the routine maintenance is completed, Mr. Ailes said, Fox News will return to the air ... with its regular broadcast schedule: “For Fox viewers, it will be like Monday never happened.”

[NYtoBush-Drop Dead]

14. hysterical...

maybe someone will pull the plug so they can't come back on the air...

[Whovian]

15. LOL. Made me look. K&R

[Cha]

17. They have it bassackwards

as usual.

Yes, I know it's Andy Borowitz.. lightening the mood and showing how dumb fox is simultaneously.

Thanks babylonsistah.. Happy National Service Saturday

http://theobamadiary.com/