T'is BRILLIANT! Rmoney's application for the job of President of the United States:

[Melinda]

Job application: President of the USA

Fill all sections:

Applicant’s name: W. Mitt Romney.

Current Position: Technically unemployed but money shepherd that herds money to lush paddock where it can graze undisturbed by the rule of law.

Current Income: mind your own business.

Job expectation: It’s my turn. If the Bush’s can do dynasty so can the Romney’s.

Tell us about your previous career/s? CEO of Bain Capital.

What did your job entail? I’d rather not talk about it, good things but if you really knew I wouldn’t get the job.

Other career experience? Governor

Tell us more about your experience in this field: I’d rather not because people know too much already so I’ve dropped it off my CV.

If you are successful in your job application what are your plans? As I’ve made it very clear in the past if you knew my plans I wouldn’t get the job.

Foreign policy experience: A successful 3 nation tour where I earned the nickname of Borat apparently a famed and esteemed European diplomat and raised cash from foreigners and non-American bankers.

Why would we choose you over another candidate? I have been on every side of everything so how can I go wrong, you tell me? I’m a renaissance liar.

Military experience: I dodged the draft and went to France and have refused to visit the troops in Afghanistan.

What do you hope to gain from this experience? No bid contracts for wars I fabricate so people I know who own the for profit war Industry receive no bid contracts, weapons sales and of course my customary commission as a fixer.

Who is your real base? About 100 people but they can afford to spend enough billions and own enough of the media to soften up, hopefully enough people to fall for me as a potential president.

Do you have any hobbies? List them. Money, hiding money, avoiding paying tax on money, picture framing money, needlepoint sewing images of money, money origami, stuffing mattresses with money, swimming in my money vault and lying.

If chosen what will you do? None of the things I promised because I said I won’t get the job if you knew. Repeal and replace Obama from Obamacare and replace it with my name care.

What are you counting on to be selected? Amnesia or Romnesia..

Application Rejected.

With kudos and all credit to "outlandish" at HuffPo

[The Magistrate]

1. Very Nice, Ma'am...

[Melinda]

2. I wish I could take credit, but - thank you, Sir. :-)