Here it is, the latest mound of HUMPDAY HATEMAIL!

[EarlG]

Don't forget to vote for your favorite -- this week's winning hatemailer will receive a bottle of Mitt Romney's new fragrance:

BUT WILL YOU BE USIN' YOUR HOODOO VOODOO TO START THE FIRE AGAIN?

Subject: Civilized Man

May I thank you for revoking my blog posting

As a Civilized man I do not wish to contribute to savages blogs.

UM, THIS IS A WEBSITE, NOT A PHONE BANK

Subject: Phone calls

Why am I on the nation d not call list, because I d not wish to receive calls from assholes like you!

THIS EMAIL IS LIKE AN OVERTIME GAME: IT HAS AN EXTRA PERIOD (RIMSHOT)

Subject: Dumbocrats

Exactly where you dumbass socialists need to be underground. Wake up. The Democratic party has turned into. An orgy of spending and entitlement. Shame on you.

BECAUSE VOTING IS SO UNDEMOCRATIC

Subject: (no subject)

Gotta love a forum using the term democratic in its name, which have Juries, that pass judgment on a poster’s posting, when they have no input in that judgment. Not walking in goose step? Judged. LOL

DON'T WORRY, WE ALREADY CANCELLED YOUR MEMBERSHIP FOR YOU

Subject: Why did you block my response?!!!

I just found out, after joining your site, that my response was blocked with this note: This post was hidden by jury decision. Jury decision? What, am I in court now??.. WTF!! What went wrong - Don't I have freedom of expression?? It was a comment about a Muslim woman wearing a "rag" around her head. The picture actually was one of Grace Kelly, who was obviously not a Muslim. I would appreciate your response. Otherwise, I'll cancel my membership due to censorship & discrimination!

I KNOW WHAT YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS WILL BE ON NOVEMBER 6: [e-mail]

Subject: Liberal fascists! Wow that was fast!

Whew, that was close. Glad to see your goon squad smoked me out. And so FAST, too!

What a bunch of losers you are. See you November 6! Who knows what email I'll be posting from then!

You guys are the biggest hypocrites on the planet. But I DO love visiting your swamp of delusion!

WHAT DRESSING WOULD YOU LIKE WITH THAT WORD SALAD?

Subject: Bias

Will do everything I can to fold all movies. MSM, affiliates.
Insulting, condescending, mocking adults, so that must mean you are children with no respect for yourself, because you have none for others.

Will not go this site again.

You report on Frauds in our Whitehouse, and thinks it is funny for him to mock our people, mock our country, mock our flag. , mock our God.
You are reporting filth, keep it in your own house , your character is sickening.

A LETTER FROM TED

Subject: inspiration?

I am an old school (former democrat supporter) senior and i am somewhat confused about just what does the democratic Party claim as a platform ? The past has been very different from what you seem to represent now.

It seems that only POLITICAL CORRECTNESS is the thing that concerns you guys and what is this business of cozying up to the Islamist cult ? Do you really want these ragheads controlling the world ?

This "PEACFUL ISLAMIC CULT" have been and always will be determined to IMPOSE THEIR SATANIC RULE MANDATED IN THEIR HOLY BOOK which was compiled by the followers of a man who idiolized HIMSELF AND HIS SEXUAL DESIRE FOR NINE YEAR OLD GIRLS.

THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY LIBERALS SEEMS TO BE TOTALLY BESERK AND UNDER SOME WEIRD TRANCE OR THEY WOULD REALIZE THAT GIVING OUR FREEDOM AWAY TO THE UNITED NATIONS AND SURRENDING OUR CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS TO THE HOPEFUL DICTATOR DOES NOT HELP THE CITIZENS.

THE DEMOCRAT PARTY HAS FORESAKEN THE UNITED STATES ( AS MY DECEASED MOM AND DAD KNEW THEM ) AND TAKEN UP A SOCIALIST ENTITLEMENT DIRECTION UNDER THE GUIDANCE OF ALENSKY .

I HAVE RESERCHED RECENT HISTORY OF RUSSIA'S STALIN, AND GERMANY'S HITLER, AND THEIR TYRANT DICTATORSHIP AND FIND VERY DISTURBING REPLICAS PRACTISED BY YOU OBAMA-MITES AND THE DEMOCRAT CONTOLLED SENATE ( NOT TO MENTION MESIAH OBAMA ).

WHY DON'T YOU JUST MAN-UP AND CHANGE THE NAME OF YOUR PARTY TO A MORE TRUTHFUL DESCRIPTION, POSSIBLY:

ISLAMIC SOCIALITES

OBAMACRATIC SOCIETY

SORO'S PUPPERTIERS

ALENSKY POLIT BUREAU

NONCONSTITUTIONAL ELITES

SATAN'S FAITHFUL DEMOCRAPS

NOT MANY POLITICIANS ARE WORTHY OF THE TRUST BESTOWED UPON THEM BY THEIR CONSTITUENTS ( GREED AND LUST FOR POWER IS THEIR MOTOVATION ).

MR. OBAMA AND THE DEMOCRAT PARTY ARE THE MOST DESERVING OF THE "TYRANT LABEL" SINCE THE PASSING OF BENEDICT ARNOLD.

IT IS WITH GREAT SHAME THAT I MADE THE ABOVE OBSERVATIONS AND STATEMENTS IN DESCRIBING THE "MODERN DEMOCRAT PARTY"

SINCERELY:
YE OLD SOUTH CAROLINA REDNECK ( AND TEA PARTY SUPPORTER ) TED P.

ANOTHER LETTER FROM TED

Subject: OBAMACULT

WHY IS IT THAT YOU DEMOCRATS PRETEND TO SUPPORT THE AFERICAN-AMERICAN COMMUNITY, BUT LASH OUT AGAINST THEIR ATTEMPS TO IMPROVE THEIR GOALS OF LEADERSHIP [ UNLESS IT IS JOINING THE DEMOCRAT SOCIALIST MOVEMENT ] ??

YOUR USE OF SLANDEROUS TERMS AGAINST BLACK REPUBLICANS LIKE: "UNCLE TOMS" AND "AUNT TOMS", MAKES A SHINNING EXAMPLE OF YOUR RACEISM.

YOUR SELF PROMOTED IMAGE OF " HOPE AND CHANGE" SEEMS TO BREAK DOWN TO:

"HOPE" ( THAT YOU CAN BRAINWASH SUPPORTERS INTO KEEPING YOU IN OFFICE ).

"CHANGE" ( CHANGE THE WEALTH OF AMERICAN CITIZENS INTO YOUR OWN COFFERS AND CHANGE OUR FREEDOMS INTO SLAVERY ).

"YES WE CAN" ( MEANING, YES WE CAN LEAD THIS GULLABLE "YOUNG GENERATION" INTO THE TRAP OF PROMISED ENTITLEMENT ).

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XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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DEFINITION OF "LIBERAL"

"L" -- ( LEAD THE POPULACE INTO COMPLANCY ).
"I" -- ( IMPLEMENT MASS DECEPTION TO GAIN SUPPORT ).
"B" - ( BLAME OTHERS, ACCEPT NO RESPONCEABILITY ).
"E" -- ( ENLIST HELP OF HOLLYWOOD ATHEIST ).
"R" -- ( REWRITE THE CONSTITUTION, REMOVE ALL FREEDOMS, ESTABLISH TOTAL GOVERNMENT CONTROL ).
"A" -- ( APPOINT "LAWLESS" CZARS ).
"L" -- ( LEAVE NO STONE UNTURNED IN THE QUEST FOR DICTATORSHIP ).

OH YEAH? WELL WHY DON'T YOU... WAIT A MINUTE -- THIS ISN'T HATEMAIL!

Subject: (no subject)

I am not a Democrat, but have to admit what your site and others strongly suggest. Romney has totally blown it. Lets all pray that the next four years can go well. I do not want my president to fail, even if I am not enamored with him.

POLL: Who is your favorite hatemailer?

97 votes, 0 passes | Time left: Time expired
	The Civilized Man.
	0 (0%)
	The person who does not wish to receive phone calls from us.
	2 (2%)
	The person who doesn't know. When to use periods.
	1 (1%)
	The person who thinks that voting is undemocratic.
	2 (2%)
	The person who is being discriminated against because we wouldn't let him say "raghead."
	3 (3%)
	The person who loves visiting our swamp of delusion.
	0 (0%)
	The person who will do everything they can to fold all movies.
	2 (2%)
	Ted Part One, in which he calls us "Soro's Puppertiers."
	60 (62%)
	Ted Part Two, in which he describes a "shinning example" of "raceism."
	5 (5%)
	The person who probably should have written us some hatemail but instead thinks that Romney has totally blown it.
	22 (23%)
	0 DU members did not wish to select any of the options provided.
Show usernames Disclaimer: This is an Internet poll

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. What a great mound!

These are all so deliciously hateful that I cannot possibly choose the best...

[HipChick]

2. Me either because I am too busy

plus I got back from lunch, arguing with a bunch of RWingers...I had an answer for everything they spewed..they finally got up and walked out the joint..

[LiberalAndProud]

15. When you have more time,

details please.

[onehandle]

3. About half of those are from me.

I kid, I kid...

[lapislzi]

4. Aspiring Islamic Socialite wants to know

Is there an etiquette book that I can study? I would hate to muff my mufti, if you know what I mean.

A socialite needs to know the rules in order to wed and bed a Bedouin.

[mlevans]

35. That is exquisite.

Thanks so much for posting that; I was finding the hatemail by and large rather humorless compared to past editions of same. To bed a Bedouin one may need to be a beserker in a burqa. No question but the eyes have it.

[lapislzi]

46. Beware of Rumi eyes, however.

they can lead one to shake it with the sheiks, and that would never do.

[FredStembottom]

92. Best laff of the week!

[Ohio Joe]

5. I love a good word salad

They are so cute when they try to speak

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

6. Damn! The THE AFERICAN PUPPERTIERS have gone totally BESERK. But whatever you do don't fall into

COMPLANCY.

[JustAnotherGen]

7. I need help

What are PUPPERTIERS? Like Puppy shaped tiers on a wedding cake?

What are Afericans? Is there a country called AFERICA?

Can anyone help me with an urban dictionEry or something for the word COMPLANCY

GULLABLE - Is this like Lible for SeaGULLs or something?


Yeah. Guess who I voted for.

[lapislzi]

12. I prefer the French pronunciation

Adherents and disciples of the great scholar Anatole Puppert.

[eppur_se_muova]

82. I think that's dictionERRy ... nt

[sabrina 1]

8. I like Ted so I voted for him. He is very 'earnest' and probably should have had a

speaking spot at the Republican National Convention!

[Indpndnt]

68. Oh, I think he did!

And he made as much sense in his speech as he did here.

[Flashmann]

9. The person who probably should have written us some hatemail

The others all appear to have been composed with the same level of disregard for fact,logic or reason,and indeed look as if written as a 4th grade class assignment.....

[Lucy Goosey]

10. "SORO'S PUPPERTIERS" for the win!

[4_TN_TITANS]

30. yeah like I didn't know we controlled him!

[immoderate]

11. Ted should have identified himself as a "Dixiecrat."

Apologies (if necessary) to any South Carolina redneck DUers.

--imm

[gkhouston]

33. That would have been awesome, especially considered his free-spirited approach to spelling. n/t

[Spitfire of ATJ]

71. Yupers! "Back in the day" when George Wallace was all the rage.

The "Democratic Party" became known as meaning majority rules so if you were a minority you didn't.

That was back before Kennedy invited Martin Luther King into the White House. Then Civil Rights became the goal of the Democrats and all the racists moved over to the Republican Party. Prior to that the people of the South were solidly behind the Democrats because the Democrats were also the party of the working man which in the South was a big deal as there were so many poor whites working as mill workers and sharecroppers while Republicans represented their bosses.

Over time it seems every negative aspect of society has been purged from the Democratic Party and found a home in the Republican Party until the Republicans have come to represent the worse position one could possibly imagine on every issue. Catering to base impulses of racism, fear, greed, and indignation.

[Jazzgirl]

13. LOLOL!!

Too bad you can't vote for more than one. I would've voted for Ted1 and 2, LOL!!

[Chorophyll]

14. I love Ted. Because dammit, he was trying to be reasonable with us folks,

but we frustrated him so badly that he desCENDED INTO A SUSTAINED CAPS-LOCK RANT THAT SPILLED OVER INTO A SECOND EMAIL AND CULMINATED IN A VERTICAL INITIAL-POEM AND PROBABLY LOTS OF ATERIAL BLOOD SPRAYING FROM HIS EYES EARS AND NOSE UNTIL THE WALLS OF HIS DEN WERE CRIMSON WITH HIS ESSENTIAL LIFE FLUIDS!!!111!!!

ARGH!!!

ARGH!!!11!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHADOAONADOVAIOEONCLV/AMDOAAWEJ/21!1 ELITES! FREEDOMS! ISLAMIC CULTS!!!11!!!!ALDOAIADIODODIDIDOQLEMF;VDKHVAOSDPC

So yeah, I voted for Ted.

[Gregorian]

20. LEAVE TED ALONE!!!!

He obviously has repressed caps lock issues that he hasn't worked out yet.

[Chorophyll]

51. NO!!! I AM THE APPOINTED CZAR OF ALL THINGS TED!!!11!

[Indpndnt]

70. OMG!!

I think I hurt myself laughing so hard!

[Chorophyll]

73. THANK YOU SATANIC LIBERAL!!1

Oops, I left my caps-lock on. Thank you. I had fun writing like Ted.

[99Forever]

16. I love Ted as he built to ...

... caplock. What a hoot! Hope he popped a few veins in his forehead.

[MineralMan]

17. ""L" -- ( LEAD THE POPULACE INTO COMPLANCY ). "

Ted's a real card.

"Complancy?"

Missing a couple of syllables, there, along with countless brain cells, apparently.

[JHB]

26. Doesn't Com Plancy write those dumbothriller novels?

You know, the "Mallard Fillmore" version technothrillers, and read like neoconfederate wet dreams?

Newt has one or two out.

[RoccoR5955]

66. no silly

Complancy is when you get people to complain a lot! ESPECIALLY when there is a RapeubliCON in office!

[LiberalAndProud]

18. I was MOTOVATED to vote.

[mlevans]

36. Which sure beats being

MOTAVOTED to VATE.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

19. I don't know if this is possible, but it woudl be cool

If instead of banning the "Teds" who come here, we could allow them posting priviledges in only one area (The Wingnut Forum, perhaps). And the only way you can post there is to have been otherwise banned -- so regular members can't go in there and poke at them.

It would be like a zoo for Tea Partiers.

[gkhouston]

34. The Free Speech Zone forum.

If we can't go in there, people will merely discuss the FSZ in Meta, which would make Meta a more entertaining place to be.

[dixiegrrrrl]

76. so regular members can't go in there and poke at them.???????????

are you mad? THAT is what makes it so damn fun!!!!

I agree there should be a special place, so that we can find them easier.
Back DU2, the Admin and the Mods ( catchy name for a Ban, don'tcha think?)
used to delay tombstoning for a few minutes, to allow time for the Welcome wagon to respond.
good times, good times.

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

84. Do NOT tease the animals....

They can't help the way they are. Besides, they'll start arguing among themselves in a few minutes.

[dmr]

88. Shoot, back in the early days, if they behaved themselves, they stayed and

we debated argued with them.

OSD (Old School Democrat) & Lonster were a couple of them.

That was kinda fun.

[JHB]

21. Didn't Bush smooch and hold hands with ISLAMIC SOCIALITES?

Who is ALENSKY? And why does he have an entire BUREAU devoted to Katha POLIT?

SORO'S PUPPERTIERS sounds interesting. Does he have TIERS for kittehs too? My mom is in the market.

Isn't PRACTISED the foreign way of spelling "practiced"? I know they use it in socialist-medicine Canada, but I think they keep the silent "e" PEACFUL and the silent "a" in RESERCHED".

(of course, Ted doesn't seem like the kind of guy who puts up with silent anythings.)

[porphyrian]

22. This is so hard...! n/t

[wryter2000]

23. Ted #1

I have to admit being intrigued at the possibility that I could be an Islamic socialite. It sounds so je ne sais quoi.

I rather love the one who thinks we're calling him on the phone.

[Lucinda]

24. You KNOW they are getting disheartened about their ticket when

the hatemail gets this wimpy. They aren't even trying anymore...

[Jim Lane]

25. Surprised that no one else has (yet) voted for Phone Call Guy.

When I read that email I could immediately see its author in a Doonesbury cartoon.

He (I'm betting it's a he) doesn't want to get phone calls from liberals, so he belligerently communicates his demand to the "assholes" at DU. He combines the routine vituperation with his own brand of screwball comedy.

[dixiegrrrrl]

77. We should install a phone in the Lounge, just for people like him.

[Avalux]

27. I think I work with TED, seriously.

Did you check his IP address, and is it from Texas?

[mlevans]

28. EarlG, I fear I must draw attention to a misspelling.

Under the circumstances, I believe the tag line on the Stench bottle really ought to read "Eau de Toilet, no?

[Kingofalldems]

29. I bet Ted is a Civil War fighter also

[JHB]

56. Maybe Russian civil war too...

...since he's upset about "LAWLESS" CZARS.

Why did he put LAWLESS in quotes? Because monarchs are only ironically lawless?

[hifiguy]

31. Simultaneous constipation of the brain and

diarrhea of the keyboard = DU's hatemail.

[graywarrior]

32. The fold movie guy

He's on one of my back flash acid trips.

[HopeHoops]

37. Ted needs to learn how to turn off the "caps lock" key. But that's "hard".

[Spirochete]

38. I was torn between the two Teds

But the "Aunt Toms" thing finally got me. Can we get Ted to post here regularly? He's funny. Like having our own real-life Bob Boudelang.

[liberalmuse]

39. Where is this "orgy of spending and entitlement"?

And how can I join?

[WilliamPitt]

40. No fair. I want to vote for both Ted letters.

[Ratty]

41. You know it occurs to me

If somebody has to read DU's mail, Humpday Hatemail must make it a little more tolerable.

[William769]

42. Kick & recommended.

[Berlin Expat]

43. Ted's CAPSLOCK rant

was epic, so naturally, I had to vote for it.

Pure wingnutese in it's finest form.

[Iris]

44. What do these people have against sentences? Or punctuation? Or dictionaries? Or capital letters? Or

lower case letters? Or subject-verb agreement?

But I'll bet they'd all support an "English Only" amendment!

[dixiegrrrrl]

78. or coherent thoughts?

[Iris]

85. I guess it all has to start there, doesn't it?

[Bossy Monkey]

45. We SO have to start a band called the Hopeful Dictators

PS: I wanted to vote for "Disclaimer: This is an Internet poll."

[donqpublic]

47. Have some mercy.

I have work to do but keep jumping for a quick update and the next thing I know, an hour has gone by. I think an Aferican is someone from African and Puerto Rican descent. I could be wrong and trying to figure out what Teddy Nutbag is saying gives me a headache.

Just remember, It's AferiCAN, not AferiCANT!

[nolabear]

48. Can we give Ted his own Forum? Because I think we can make him pop a vessel.

I love you, Ted.

[porphyrian]

49. I would like to petition for more Ted #2 votes.

I know, the first one is amazing. However, when you cast your vote for Ted #1, consider the following:

- "THE AFERICAN-AMERICAN COMMUNITY"

- "AUNT TOMS"

- "A SHINNING EXAMPLE OF YOUR RACEISM"

- "--------------------------------------------------------
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XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXX" (This may very well be the finest ASCII art in decades.)

- "B" - ( BLAME OTHERS, ACCEPT NO RESPONCEABILITY ).


Your vote matters.

[porphyrian]

81. Have you no compassion?!

Sure, Ted #1 is manifesto, but how can you ignore Ted's making himself vulnerable and exposing his artistic side to you? Ted is not a poet, he is a bard, bleeding his heart out before you in desperate dashes and exes. Grown men also cry.

Vote Ted #2.

[Puppertierdesoros]

50. Ted inspired me

To join DU

[immoderate]

53. Welcome aboard!

We have fun!

--imm

[JHB]

57. Welcome, and a +1 for your name

[beac]

60. Welcome and long may you

puppert!

[LiberalAndProud]

67. You were just waiting for the perfect user name, weren't you?

Welcome!

[Spitfire of ATJ]

72. Welcome. Ted is like a breath of fresh ass.

[Tsiyu]

52. "Soro's Puppertiers"

my new band name!

[Warren DeMontague]

54. Ah, yes, Ted the "old school southern Democrat"

I suspect he left the party right about when George Wallace did.

[LeftofObama]

55. I had to vote for Ted 2

Until now I didn't know what the letters in the word liberal stood for, now I do. I'll sleep better tonight.

[ismnotwasm]

58. Ted part 2

He made me laugh

[NICO9000]

59. What is with George Soros that drives them so crazy?

It's not like he's ever in the public eye.

[Care Acutely]

61. I'm voting for the last guy. I like him :-)

ETA: It was tough though, because Ted is FUNNY ASS SHIT.

[Ikonoklast]

62. For A Small Donation Of Only $50.00, You Can Become A Soro Pupper Tier Member!

And For A One-Time $100.00 Donation, We'll Move You Up To The Warren Buffet Pupper Tier Level Membership!

Act Fast! Limited Time Offer!

[MadrasT]

63. I *love* "swamp of delusion"

But Ted's transition to CAPSLOCK RAGE and pupperiers de Soros was irresistable.

[surrealAmerican]

64. Usually, it's hard to choose a favorite in these polls, but this time ...

... it was easy. TED is by far the most entertaining delusional emailer EVER!

[treestar]

65. You know you are dealing with a true wing nut

When they mention Saul "Alensky"

[Alduin]

69. Ted needs to go back to grade school and learn how to spell.

[Initech]

74. Ted's definition of liberal had me rolling!!

[Initech]

75. "Satan's Faithful Democraps" would make a great name for a rock band.

[txwhitedove]

87. That was my favorite too!

[Royal Sloan 09]

79. k & R, DUzy thread

Winner, caplocks TED Just too much,

[Monk06]

80. Freeper hate mail used to be full of piss and vinigar, had some spirtit. Now it's just whine vinigar

[Egalitarian Thug]

83. K&R in praise of spell-checker. I'm talking to you, Ted ( I know you're reading this). n/t

[DainBramaged]

86. ALENSKY POLIT BUREAU

[Chiyo-chichi]

89. The Puppertiers are nowhere near as good as Mummenschanz.

[Iggo]

90. Word salad.

All three.

[druidity33]

91. Whew... i'll go with Lucinda and Rocco on this one...

too difficult to choose. Gonna have to pass. An extraordinary collection of whackadoodles though.

[lpbk2713]

93. Argghh ... this makes my head hurt.

I can only take so much of a dosage of stupidity at one time.