LOSER45 tested positive this morning WAIT tested negative NOPE positive, in another sense WAIT posit

[Leghorn21]

"I tested very positively in another sense, this morning. I tested
positively toward negative, right. I tested perfectly this morning.
Meaning I tested negative. ... That's a way of saying it: positively
toward the negative."

Link to tweet

[SWBTATTReg]

1. What an idiot. He is positively an idiot in my book and I didn't have to deploy a testing kit or...

the like to figure this out.

[live love laugh]

43. He's a master at doublespeak. nt

[Turbineguy]

2. What an interesting man you are!

[underpants]

15. I'm just glad the children were here to hear this authentic frontier gibberish

[progressoid]

25. +1

[LiberalArkie]

31. The young kids might not know the scene

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

3. Does he think these are tests you have to prepare for in

order to get a "great, tremendous" score???

[Eliot Rosewater]

5. He needs to call his college professors, the ones who said he was the dumbest student

they EVER had, maybe they can give him a lollipop!

It makes sense that the dumbest Americans would pick the dumbest of all to lead them.

[leftieNanner]

23. Kinda like I think I should win at golf

Because I have the most points.

[Hawaii Hiker]

4. As Homer Simpson would say - DOH

[Tanuki]

6. He reminds me of Irwin Corey, only stupid.

[CaptYossarian]

39. The one time Trump doesn't sound like Norm Crosby,

he channels Hank Kimball from "Green Acres".

Well, maybe not Hank Kimball, but...okay, I guess it was Hank Kimball! Now what were we talking about?

[jcgoldie]

7. Who's on first!

Its like he doesn't even need a sidekick to generate that sort of absolute confusion.

[Caliman73]

8. No, you idiot. There is a way that people speak so that we can understand each other.

It is well established. Idiot!

Here is a sample phone conversation between people with functional brains:

Me: Did your test for strep throat come back?
Friend: Yes, I just got the results this morning. It came back negative.
Me: That's great! I am glad to hear you don't have strep.
Friend: Yeah, but it came back positive for Mononucleosis.
Me: Aw man that is horrible. Sorry to hear it. Go rest, drink plenty of fluids. I can take you some throat spray if you need it.

He can never just say, "I miss spoke. My test was negative for COVID." He has to dance around like an idiot trying to distort reality into something where he meant to say what he said. It just makes him look like what he is... an idiot.

[Iliyah]

9. Distraction . ..

Senate republicans just put a white nationalist as head of the IC.

[Leghorn21]

10. A tweeter makes a point we can surely all agree on!:

“Can't wait for the @sarahcpr take on this.”

YEP!

[Wellstone ruled]

11. Hey,you can only

pile bullshit just so high before it tips over.

[Brainfodder]

12. Do we have proof he can even dress himself?

Need to start someplace....

[niyad]

13. Hmmm. . He has valets, so probably not even that.

[underpants]

14. Well yeah...positive on a PER CAPITA basis...too

https://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1017&pid=583551

[sop]

16. Trump is obviously suffering from a form of political Tourette's Syndrome.

[underpants]

17. Boy I'd hate to see THAT pop up on Duo Lingo

I’d just type in “No comprendo” and lose a heart

[JDC]

18. I can get someone being tongue tied on occasion, but this guy is just an idiot

Pure and simple. Dumb as a stump.

[Aviation Pro]

19. Shitbag suffers from stupidvirus

Just quarantine your fatass until President Biden is inaugurated.

[Historic NY]

20. negatively positive or positively negative?

[Leghorn21]

22. HA, I just told a friend that SURELY "positively negative" will be trending at #1 here shortly!!!?

— and since all the idiot ever reads is tweets, *someone*’s about to have himself a shitty Thursday afternoon!!

[OverBurn]

21. Very negative that he wasn't positive? Yes

[LiberalFighter]

24. I seen that.

Schools need to do a better job when awarding diplomas.

[Midnight Writer]

26. Perhaps someone should review his old syphilis tests?

[oldsoftie]

27. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!! I cant stand it......

[GeorgeGist]

28. Positive is GOOD ...

on a per capita basis relative to negative.

[Hulk]

29. God help us!

We won’t make it with another four years with this idiot.

[Maeve]

30. This sounds like his original doctor letter!

Mr Trump has had a recent complete medical examination that showed only positive results. Actually, his blood pressure, 110/65, and laboratory test results were astonishingly excellent.

[Volaris]

32. That means he understands it the way a ten year old does...

He hasn't yet figured out the definitions yet; is struggling to keep it straight in his head.

No, little johnny...its opposite. Positive means positive FOR THE VIRUS, which is BAD for you. Negative means NO virus, which is what you WANT

In short, hes a fucking idiot who shouldnt be in charge of opening his own aspirin bottles, let alone a nationwide pandemic.

[herding cats]

33. It obviously wasn't an IQ test. 🤣

[SeattleVet]

34. Just wait until he finds out about the Turbo Encabulator!

[BootinUp]

35. -1 + 1 equals Trump

[Johnny2X2X]

36. If you owned a Dairy Queen...

If you owned a Dairy Queen, would you trust that Trump would have the mental capacity to work for you? No way he gets past 45 seconds of the interview before you'd be thinking, "Oh boy, this guy...this guy won't be able to fill an ice cream cone without completely botching the job."

He's that dumb, he's that functionally stupid.

No disrespect meant to Dairy Queen workers, it's respectable work.

[CaptYossarian]

44. He's only qualified to be a human paperweight.

Always was--always will be.

Besides, Dairy Queen employees are very essential. My near-empty wallet proves that.

[RainCaster]

37. That's a new low in tweeting. What nonsense!

This is a new low in internet fertilizer.

[saidsimplesimon]

38. I never cared, do you? Selfish, ignorant, dumb brat in a red tie

Feed the fool fast food and f' him and the clown car he rode in on.

I'm suffering cabin fever so forgive me for raging against the IT responsible for a slow response.

[nuxvomica]

40. This is because of the Norman Vincent Peale mindfuck

His family attended Peale's services and Peale's con was to push the "power of positive thinking". Trump was so mindfucked by this that he feels even negative comments about him are like physical blows. Trump is part high-functioning con artist and low-functioning cult follower and it's hard to tell which is running things at any given time because they are both bad at everything.

[gordianot]

41. Double plus good duck speak for the orange UV duck.

[RoadRising]

42. Paging @sarahcpr

Between this and his explanation of per capita, she’s gotta be busy.

[smirkymonkey]

45. Ugh! Such a dick.

[calimary]

46. What a fucking MORON!

Or, for you trumpers, what a fucking MORAN.

[Cha]

47. Shut up, trump

[lindysalsagal]

48. Inspiring foreign leaders from day one.

Not.