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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forums10 million in Trump change, a column by Mike Royko on Trump from 1991
March 29, 1991
Chicago Tribune
Mike Royko was a columnist for the Chicago Tribune when he wrote this column.
The character in the essay, Slats Grobnik, is a fictitious personae, a comically stereotyped working class Polish-Chicagoan.
$10 million in Trump change
I admit that when it all began, 1 was on Ivana Trump's side. It seemed that she was being treated shabbily by The Donald, as she called her husband.
It wasn't merely that he had been unfaithful. Sad to say, such things can happen when a man enters his 40s. This is known as the midlife crisis. And the crisis can be even more acute for a handsome, ruthless billionaire with an ego the size of a sperm whale and who numbers among his acquaintances many lustful models who have a strange fondness for handsome, ruthless billionaires.
But he wasn't a gentleman. Had he been a gentleman, he could still have carried on like a cad, but discreetly. A suave Frenchman, for example, would have stashed his perky tart in a flat on the other side of town and spent afternoons there calming his midlife crisis. But he would return home sauteing the snails properly. You have to admire the French; they know how to mess around.
Instead, Trump flaunted his misconduct. He stashed his young sweetie in an apartment in his very own building. And he even had her tag along on a ski trip, which led to harsh words and an angry scene between Ivana and the sweetie in the ski lodge. As Slats Grobnik put it: "It would be like me playing around, then having the wife and bimbo both show up at my bowling league. This guy ain't got no class."
And then the final act of degradation: Trump actually discussed these personal matters with New York gossip columnists. The journalistic transom-peekers who make their livings tattling about who is nibbling whose earlobe in which chic restaurant, who was seen with which trollop on his arm at a charity ball and which unhappy couple is believed to be going to "Splitsville."
For any normal person, it would be bad enough just being mentioned in such columns. But it's a measure of Trump's lack of character that he actually volunteered information to people whose idea of a good time is sifting through someone's laundry hamper.
And I finally decided that he was totally loathsome when, in addition to his other flaws, he turned out to be a cheapo. As you may recall, he whipped out an old prenuptial agreement and said that all he had to give Ivana was $25 million and a mansion or two.
That seemed like a fortune to some people. I recall asking my wife if she would accept such a settlement, and she said: "Let me think about it for a moment or so. Yes I suppose so. But I would also demand custody of the cat."
But at the time, Trump was said to be one of America's richest men, a billionaire. (For math flunkouts. a billion is one thousand million.) And for a billionaire, his marital buyout amounted to little more than a pittance.
So when Ivana demanded half of everything Trump had, I wrote a column expressing my support. Which made her day, I'm sure.
Her demand seemed fair to me. She had been a good wife: faithful, supportive, loving, and she never was seen in public with curlers and floppy slippers. And it was rumored that to keep herself youthful and attractive, she had undergone those surgical tucks and nips. That's risky business. If you let the doc stretch your facial skin too often, it can snap and roll up like a window shade, and your nose and lips end up somewhere around the back of your neck.
But now everything has changed and I'm officially withdrawing my sympathy from Ivana. That's because Trump's empire collapsed, and he is no longer a billionaire. Or even a millionaire. In fact, he's so deep in hock that under normal circumstances he could be considered a bum. But he owes all those hundreds of millions to banks, and they can't let him become a bum because they have so much invested in him. (That's why I don't understand bankers. They'll repossess your car. but they give a deadbeat like Trump a few million a year in spending money.)
So now he's up to his sneer in a mountain of debt. He's become such a pathetic wretch that when he calls the gossip columnists. they actually put him on hold.
Yet, he talked the bankers into advancing him $10 million to pay off Ivana. And he arranged for her to get one of the mansions.
Under the circumstances. $10 million and a mansion is not a bad deal. There are many women who would accept that even if their husbands had not played around with anything prettier than a pinball machine.
But Ivana brushed it off. She didn't even show up at the courtroom, where Trump stood helplessly waving the $10 million check like a guy trying to hail a cab.
Is that fair? She once demanded half of everything. Now everything is less than nothing. Yet, she turns down 10 biggies and a good place to flop.
I hate to say this, but I think she's being vindictive. Women can be like that. Men, too, but they're not as well known for it.
Slats is probably right when he says: "I figure she won't be happy until he has gone all the way down, to the final resting place for low-down unfaithful husbands."
She wants to see him in hell?
"No. Living in a room at the YMCA. Let him try to sneak a bimbo in there."
https://www.billygoattavern.com/2016/05/27/mike-royko-on-donald-trump/
Mike Royko first wrote a daily column in the Daily News, a Chicago paper from 1964 to 1978. In 1972, Royko received the Pulitzer Prize for commentary as a Daily News columnist. When the Daily News closed in 1978, he worked for the Chicago Sun-Times until Rupert Murdoch bought the paper in 1984. He then went to work for the Chicago Tribune and worked there until his death in 1997.
Royko commented that "No self-respecting fish would want to be wrapped in Murdoch paper", and "His goal is not quality journalism. His goal is vast power for Rupert Murdoch, political power".
a kennedy
(29,678 posts)Skittles
(153,169 posts)....please
Hekate
(90,727 posts)The only thing Mike Royko ever did that irked me was call the young and idealistic Jerry Brown "Governor Moonbeam," a nickname that stuck and probably hurt his chances when he ran for potus. Royko finally took it back many years later -- after all, Brown was proven right about the environment.
His was an incisive gift of observation and wit, based in a city not my own, and still a pleasure to read.
captain queeg
(10,209 posts)Back when people read things called newspapers.
Marie Marie
(9,999 posts)He was truly, one of a kind. And that column on Trump was a perfect example of why I loved reading his pieces.
Brother Buzz
(36,447 posts)<snip>
Well, here we are four decades later and Gov. Jerry Brown is still clinging to the nickname Mike gave him all those years ago.
In a recent speech, Brown, commenting on President-elect Donald Trump and climate change, said, "If Trump turns off the satellites, California will launch its own damn satellite." And then he reminded the crowd of the label Mike pinned on him: "Gov. Moonbeam."
It was 1976 and Brown was seeking his party's presidential nomination and Mike wrote that the governor was attracting "the moonbeam vote."
The truth is he really liked Brown, and at the 1980 Democratic National Convention he wrote these words of praise:
"The more I see of Brown, the more I am convinced that he has been the only Democrat in this years politics who understands what this country will be up against." And then he did a mea culpa for the Moonbeam nickname. He declared it "idiotic" and asked others to stop using it.
But as we know, Brown didn't shed it, he redefined it as "creative and not hidebound to the status quo. It also stands for not being the insider, but standing apart and marching to my own drummer."
<more>
https://www.sacbee.com/opinion/california-forum/article124423849.html
Beringia
(4,316 posts)looking for an interview with Burt Lancaster, and stumbled on Phil Donahue with Trump on his show. Then the thought occurred to me that Royko may have written about him and so I found the article by him.
Karadeniz
(22,541 posts)localroger
(3,629 posts)They'll repossess your car, but give a deadbeat like Trump a few million a year in spending money.
greatauntoftriplets
(175,745 posts)He's be writing some great columns if he was still alive. I'd see him walking down Michigan Avenue. His height always surprised me.
Beringia
(4,316 posts)I was a bicycle messenger and delivered a letter to him. I was in awe of him and when he got in the elevator, I continued to stare at him. He slowly went on his tippy-toes to watch me watching him.
Also saw Ann Landers once waddling into the Chicago Tribune building.
Here's a tribute to him with many people he knew and worked with
greatauntoftriplets
(175,745 posts)Didn't always agree with him, but that was rare.
CanonRay
(14,106 posts)Cartoonist
(7,319 posts)But he got conservative in his old age. Probably from the water coolers at the Tribune. Not bat shit crazy, but more stodgy.
mountain grammy
(26,626 posts)Every chance I got..even remember this one. Thanks for posting.
yonder
(9,668 posts)"....the wife and bimbo both show up at my bowling league. This guy ain't got no class."
and
"So now he's up to his sneer in a mountain of debt." Pure Royko there, and as true then, as today.
I had a boss once who was an editor at an engineering company we both worked at. He was a former Chicago area sports writer and claimed that he and Royko would occasionally buy each other drinks. He would tell a story on how Royko got his first writing job - by bluffing an editor into hiring him though he had little to no writing experience. According to that boss, "Look it up, look it up" is what Royko would say when on the end of an argument about sports or politics in which the stats or sources were weak. I may be mis-remembering that one, though as it might have been been a Studs Terkel/Jimmy Breslin story.
Beringia
(4,316 posts)He did a lot of reading himself, which must have given him some of his talent.
In an interview, he told a co-worker, young woman reporter, that she should read "And Quiet Flows the Don" by Mikhail Sholokhov. It sounds like a deep book and I may get it to read myself.
coti
(4,612 posts)live love laugh
(13,120 posts)Martin Eden
(12,872 posts)Now the column on page 2 of the Trib is polluted by a RW hack named John Kass (aka JacKass).