A Republican Prayer
Dear Jesus:
Please don’t hold it against me that I have turned my back on you, in order to worship a lying pussy-grabber who represents everything you find abhorrent.
Please forgive me for supporting everything he says and does, from imprisoning and abusing innocent children, to ignoring your admonitions to welcome strangers and to treat others as we would be treated.
Please hear my prayers, even as I refuse to hear the cries of those who are suffering at the hands of the man I have chosen to idolize.
Please excuse my hypocrisy as I pretend to follow your teachings, while using your name to encourage others to do exactly the opposite of what you have taught us to do.
Please find it in your heart to look the other way when I judge others based on their race, their religious beliefs, and their ethnicity, instead of judging them on the basis of what is in their hearts.
Please do not take notice when I take the side of people who sow hatred and bigotry, and when I defend their actions and their words.
Please show me the compassion I steadfastly refuse to show others, and provide me with the good health I would happily deny to those who can’t afford to pay for it.
Please avert your eyes as I choose to see the world in terms of what is beneficial to me, instead of what is right and just for others.
Please forget that I have abandoned every Christian principle I ever professed to believe in, and make a mockery of those principles by professing to still adhere to them.
Please keep in mind that my defence of a cruel, totally corrupt madman is not a mindless choice, but a deliberate decision to choose him over You.
Please put me first, despite the fact that I put the welfare of my country and my fellow citizens last.
Please keep my family safe, happy, and secure, while I continue to support those who separate families and treat my fellow human beings like animals.
Thy Will be done – as long as it doesn’t interfere with the will of Donald Trump, no matter how heartless, how corrupt, and how morally bankrupt he has proven himself to be.
In your Holy Name, I beg your indulgence – or at least a free pass to heaven. I pray that when I face your final judgment, you will show me the mercy I have denied others, and will choose to forget how willing I have been to turn away from everything you are, and every Christian value you have taught me to uphold.
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Thanks! 
Really great. 
Their "Christian values" are a complete sham, it's too bad that they can't see their own hypocrisy.
