If I could ask a favor, please read Kathleen Dehmlow's obituary

[underpants]

'World is a Better Place Without Her': Minnesota Woman's Obit Takes Brutal Turn

https://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/World-is-a-Better-Place-Without-Her-Minnesota-Womans-Children-Write-Brutal-Obit-484610751.html

[hatrack]

1. OW!!

Just . . . damn . . .

[hlthe2b]

2. I'm guessing she did not make amends....

Ouch....

I'm guessing every day was the Festivus airing of grievances in that family...


I hope they can move on now....

[DrDan]

3. yo! that stung

[Me.]

4. Do You Know Her?

if a dicey question don't answer.

[underpants]

8. No

I just heard about it and wanted to look it up

[mnhtnbb]

5. Judgment is misspelled in the last paragraph of her obit.

Who knows what went on?

Sounds like the start of a best seller.

[Ms. Toad]

12. Both spellings are acceptable;

judgment is the dominant spelling in the US, but it is more mixed the UK.

http://www.dictionary.com/e/judgement-vs-judgment/

I spelled it with an "e" until about 2 decades ago

[mnhtnbb]

14. Ah, British English vs. American English

There are lots of words with different spellings between British English and American English.

Here's an interesting list:

https://www.spreeder.com/important-american-and-british-spelling-differences-you-should-know-2/

And a little history about the word in question:

http://grammarist.com/spelling/judgment-judgement/

One wouldn't expect to see a British English spelling of the word in a local Minnesota paper. In fact, the Chicago article about it corrected the spelling when they quoted the line.

I just thought it was intriguing and ironic that the people who were apparently so delighted in the concept of judgment being passed on the dead woman used what is considered in American English to be an incorrect spelling of the word.

Judgment from someone who wasn't quite so perfect, either. Hmmm...what's that old Scriptural reference? "Judge not, that ye be not judged."

[USALiberal]

16. Seriously? That is your response??? Nt

[MustLoveBeagles]

6. Ouch! That stung

I'm not condoning her behavior if true but did that really need to be put in the paper? What's the point in shaming her after her death?

[struggle4progress]

7. Sometimes you just have to let it go

[dixiegrrrrl]

9. Let that be a lesson to her.

Boy, they taught her, eh?

[Blue_true]

10. Not a lot of class in the Obit.

The kids would have come off much better by leaving it be and not saying or writing anything.

[hunter]

11. If Gina and Jay are "good" Christian people...

... welcome to hell. Do not past "GO" do not collect $200.

Kathleen is in a better place.

My bad, bad, bad girl Hollywood great aunt lived more than a century and discarded a few bad husbands and lovers and annulments along the way.

Her last Catholic heretic husband was a keeper, and she was fortunate that he and she be adored by all family and community younger, all anyone important.

My mom asked me and my bad ass biker brothers to be bouncers at her last husband's funeral in case any holier-than-though Christian relatives showed up making trouble. A few did, but they remained silent. And the priest, who had a bad blood history with my great aunt's husband, made a complete ass of himself and that too was celebrated at his wake.

I'm inclined to like Kathleen Dehmlow.

[EllieBC]

17. She didn't just leave a husband. Per the obit

she left her kids behind as well. Why would you admire that? People freak the fuck out about people leaving a dog at a pound but kids? Who cares, right?

[hunter]

18. Her children were raised by her parents.

There's no story about the dad.

Maybe Kathleen was abused, mentally ill, or an addict. Maybe Kathleen's parents resented raising the kids so much they poisoned their relationship with their mom. We don't know.

My own grandmother became a danger to herself and others and had to be removed from the house she owned by court order, police, and paramedics. It was an hours long standoff, she was throwing things, cussing, kicking, hitting, and biting all the way. Later, when she was more stable, no nursing home or assisted living place could hold her long so she'd live with my parents. She was basically a bag lady with a good pension who brought chaos wherever she went, who could say the most hateful things imaginable.

For example, I have severe asthma and her chain-smoking put me in the hospital a couple of times. She'd offer to take care of me and my siblings and she'd promise my parents up, down, and sideways that she wasn't going to smoke. And then she would... She was convinced asthma was a mind-over-matter thing. Cigarettes are a terrible addiction.

We can think up all sorts of reasons to hate people but it's a waste of time and energy. My crazy grandma left us with lots of stories to tell, good, bad, and ugly. Her obituary was a story.

"We hate you mom, see you in hell!" tells me more about the kids than it does their mother. When I read obituaries I'm looking for stories about the deceased, not their survivors.

[nini]

13. wow

Having had my sister go through parental alienation I'm going to withhold judgment. She very well may have been a crappy mother, but the first husband may have been a jerk and she had to leave to save them all.

Either way.. they need to get some help to find some kind of peace with it all. Sad.

[Ilsa]

15. I feel sorry for Gina and Jay.

Their mother abandoned them. How could they as children rationalize why it might be okay for her to leave them? It sounds to me like they never fully recovered from this trauma, much the same way as these children held in detention may never recover.