I have to say that Barbara Bush's funeral service is as

[malaise]

establishment Catholic/Anglican as it gets. It has included as many myths as are present at most of them (including those of my own relatives and friends) but was not unpleasant. All that is missing is the incense.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. The music kind of sucked, though.

If anybody sang "I Come To The Garden Alone" at my funeral I'd haunt them forever. Last weekend I was a very high-church Episcopal funeral as a member of a choral ensemble, and this service was very much the same, except that we had more and better music.

[malaise]

2. Well the music was definitely her generation's music

although Great is thy Faithfulness was missing. My paternal grandma loved that Garden one
Tweety says wonderful high church and noted the subtle digs at Emperor Skeevy.
Most interesting for me was the fact that she planned the service three weeks ago.

[left-of-center2012]

79. "her generation's music"

Amazing Grace?

[malaise]

86. Most of it - not all of it n/t

[CTyankee]

8. I remember that song/hymn being played at funerals in Texas when I was growing up.

I never heard it at funerals here. My guess is that the Bush's liked it so much they wanted it played at their funerals.

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=i+come+to+the+garden+alone

[malaise]

10. When my youngest sister died in 2005, the family requested this

and they said it was a wedding song in Florida - my sisters insisted because mom had it at her own funeral.

[LeftInTX]

72. That's beautiful....don't associate with weddings

I've heard it before...

Maybe at a feast day for Mary.

Maybe on Good Friday.

[malaise]

73. Yes we learned it at Catholic school for those Mary days

but it is a regular funeral song in the Caribbean particularly at funerals for moms.
A good friend who is Catholic lay clergy says she can't understand how it's a wedding song.

[MFM008]

28. Lol

Thats haunting...

[CBHagman]

32. I wish we could recommend individual responses to an OP.

If anybody sang "I Come To The Garden Alone" at my funeral I'd haunt them forever.

I love the way you think.

And I have by turns cringed and smiled at what music turns up at funeral services. On more than one occasion I've wanted to ask who chose the hymns and, more crucially, why. But I never dared to ask at a time like that.

[WhiteTara]

35. I don't have to worry on that one.

I'm not having a funeral. Cremation and dropped into the sea to create coral reefs if I can't be wrapped in mushrooms and left in the forest.

No funeral, no ookey funeral songs.

[malaise]

37. Same here

There will be no ceremony whatsoever

[WhiteTara]

42. Unless we throw in the Irish wake to go along

with Buddhist chanting prayers for the dead before they turn me in to the authorities.

[MFM008]

91. every day is an Irish wake

In my house.........

[WhiteTara]

92. To celebrate the rising and mourn the setting of the sun, no doubt!

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

43. Not even a party?

I would prefer a party, and my friends can get drunk on whatever is left of my estate.

[pnwmom]

47. You are basically describing an Irish wake. n/t

[malaise]

59. ROFL

Nothing - I want nothing - cremation - send a notice to the newspaper to say I'm dead and state that by request there will be no ceremony. I notice in our Sunday papers that more and more folks are doing that.

[greatauntoftriplets]

81. I'm with you.

Haven't decided where I want my ashes tossed, but I want an Irish wake. No keening, but everybody getting shit-faced drinking toasts to me.

[WhiteTara]

82. And they have to drink to toasts made by me

before I died. That way they can be doubly drunk and I can be vicariously in the Bardo.

[vlyons]

53. That hymn made me change the channel

[mahatmakanejeeves]

44. Oh, that's a great tune.

From a great movie:

I haven't been watching the funeral. Here's one from a few years ago:

At 14:37 (t=877), look for former Washington Post executive Boisfeuillet Jones Jr.

Boisfeuillet "Bo" Jones Jr. (/ˈboʊfəleɪ/ BOH-fə-lay; born 1946) was president and chief executive officer of MacNeil/Lehrer Productions in Arlington, Virginia. He was former Vice Chairman of The Washington Post Company and Chairman of The Washington Post board from 2008 until December 31, 2011. From 2000 to 2008 he was publisher and chief executive officer of The Washington Post.

Early life

Jones was born in Atlanta in 1946 to Boisfeuillet Jones Sr., a philanthropist, and Laura Coit Jones. Anne Baynon Register Jones became his step-mother following the death of his mother and the marriage of his father to Anne Register. Jones went to high school at St. Albans School in Washington, D.C., and later received an A.B. in 1968 from Harvard College, where he was president of The Harvard Crimson and a member of the Spee Club. At both St. Albans and Harvard he was two years behind Donald E. Graham, his future employer. He attended Exeter College, Oxford University as a Rhodes Scholar and received a D.Phil. in modern history. He received his J.D. in 1974 from Harvard Law School, where he was an editor of the Harvard Law Review.

He reads from Ecclesiastes Chapter 3, verses 1 through 11. This is my favorite Bible passage, and it is the one that everyone knows. For a reading at a funeral, you can't go wrong with this.

Boisfeuillet "Bo" Jones Jr. is reading from the English Standard Version.

Ecclesiastes 3, English Standard Version

I had read that passage myself at my mother's funeral barely a month earlier, though I believe I stopped at verse 8. I read from the King James Version.

Ecclesiastes 3, King James Version

My mother was the same age as Barbara Bush when she died.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

52. Ick. IMO it's sentimental and treacly.

But to each his/her own, I guess.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

65. Laughing. Thanks.

I eat grits for breakfast most every day too, so my taste couldn't be that great.

Thanks again.

[Tanuki]

66. It was also in Robert Altman's film "Nashville," sung by the Loretta Lynn

character (Ronee Blakely's Barbara Jean) in the hospital chapel after her breakdown.Though obviously not a fan favorite on DU, In the Garden is a classic and standard hymn of faith and beloved by many ordinary Americans. Here are some renditions by Mahalia Jackson, Willie Nelson, and Loretta:

[CTyankee]

69. Elvis sang it too.

[applegrove]

87. I like 'Fight the Good Fight' as a hymn. That was my grandfather's favourite.

He went to military college and fought in WWII. We sang it at his presbyterian funeral years ago:


1 Fight the good fight with all thy might.
Christ is thy strength and Christ thy right.
Lay hold on life, and it shall be 
thy joy and crown eternally.

2 Run the straight race through God's good grace;
lift up thine eyes, and seek Christ's face.
Life with its way before us lies;
Christ is the path, and Christ the prize.

3 Cast care aside; lean on thy guide.
God's boundless mercy will provide.
Trust, and thy trusting soul shall prove
Christ is its life, and Christ its love.

4 Faint not nor fear: God's arms are near.
God changeth not, and thou art dear.
Only believe, and thou shalt see
that Christ is all in all to thee.


https://www.hymnal.net/en/hymn/h/872

My favourite poem was the one we chose when my mom died:

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/437994-i-thought-the-earth-remembered-me-she-took-me-back

I thought the earth remembered me,
she took me back so tenderly,
arranging her dark skirts, her pockets
full of lichens and seeds.
I slept as never before, a stone on the river bed,
nothing between me and the white fire of the stars
but my thoughts, and they floated light as moths
among the branches of the perfect trees.
All night I heard the small kingdoms
breathing around me, the insects,
and the birds who do their work in the darkness.
All night I rose and fell, as if in water,
grappling with a luminous doom. By morning
I had vanished at least a dozen times
into something better.

Mary Oliver


Different ends of the religious spectrum but that what I like. Sounds like Barbara's funeral was well done.

[dalton99a]

3. And something like Ave Maria

[malaise]

6. That's more Catholic than Anglican but this was missing

[MaryMagdaline]

78. Beautiful rendition

I am surprised the Bushes chose such a Catholic song. All traditions are merging it seems

That song was designed to extract every tear from the body. It is an anthropoligal gem. Mourning ritual ... Southern European

[oberliner]

4. Myths?

[malaise]

7. Myths about religion and the deceased

I've been to funerals and after hearing some of the tributes, I almost asked the undertaker folks to open the casket so I could see if it was the same person I knew.

[Greybnk48]

16. Yep.

[dubyadiprecession]

83. Take one look at the body and say,"I was expecting to see Jesus!"

[malaise]

84. DUzy

[phylny]

5. Nice thing is that she planned her own funeral

to suit her beliefs, no one else’s.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

9. Yes, and she got to choose the music, too. I didn't like it but she did,

so that's the music that should have been performed.

[malaise]

12. Agreed n/t

[highplainsdem]

11. I thought it was very moving, perfectly done.

And if it was her specific request that Trump NOT be invited -- another perfect touch.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

19. I wonder what Spanky's funeral will be like?

Tacky, I'm sure. Lots of gilded stuff. But I wonder if anyone will be found to say anything nice about him? Some fundy prosperity-gospel preacher will probably blather. Some people might want to attend, as a friend of mine once said, "just to be sure the SOB is dead."

[malaise]

24. It will be at a gaudy mega-church

overdone, over the top - a fitting end to a circus act.

[MFM008]

29. I wish i was watching

His funeral now.....
With my champagne.....

[argyl]

80. Former blackout drunk, haven't had or wanted a drink for 37years but for Trump....

[QC]

31. I'm thinking it will be something like this:

[GulfCoast66]

36. I do not know. What is common in Moscow?

[Kirk Lover]

21. +1000 The eulogies moved me.

[monmouth4]

45. Jon Meacham, how appropro and wonderful he was..n/t

[Rorey]

51. I only watched the beginning

But I found it touching. The verse read by her granddaughter (To everything there is a season, etc..) was my mom's favorite and read at her own funeral, and In The Garden was a favorite of my dad's. He sang it many times.

Everyone likes different things, and that's fine. At a funeral for one of my son's best friends, rap music was played. It definitely wasn't my cup of tea, but it's what he listened to, so it was appropriate.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

93. See Reply #44

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100210522274#post44

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

13. I was a little surprised that W didn't speak.

Not that I particularly wanted to hear his dulcet tones again - but there were 5 children and I guess Jeb was the DH for the occasion.

[malaise]

15. True

I'm no Bush fan but it was tasteful - nothing excessive

[Kirk Lover]

22. I think Barbara picked him...she planned a lot of it. nt

[Zoonart]

14. My Mom was a Protestant Sunday school Teacher and

she loved "In The Garden" too. It has that old-timey sing-a-long thing going on.

Definately old school.

[malaise]

17. My paternal grandma

was Scots Kirk

[Zoonart]

18. Roots were Dutch Reform here...

that's a couple of generations back. My brother stayed in the church. I'm a Buddhist and my husband is a Birth right Quaker.

Different strokes.

[malaise]

20. Mom was Catholic on steroids

I have no religion or faith, but I do enjoy some of the music.

[Zoonart]

23. Yep...

some of the most beautiful art and music in history had been created out of spitritual devotion. Inspiration is inspiraton I guess.

[malaise]

25. +1,000

Amazing indeed

[Zoonart]

26. Cheers, Mal!

[monmouth4]

46. Though it was an Episcopal service I was confused with the Apostles Creed. At the end of it

it says "I believe in the Holy Catholic Church." Is that because Episcopalians were once Catholic? Color me surprised as I recited along with it..

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

55. See #40 - it's small "c" catholic, meaning all-encompassing.

But the Episcopal Church, the American branch of the Anglican Church, was Catholic until Henry VIII decided he wanted a divorce and the Pope wouldn't let him do it. After that schism the church still retained a lot of the Catholic liturgy because Henry wasn't concerned about theology as much as about getting what he wanted.

[monmouth4]

67. I'm a faithful watcher of The Tudors and Henry VIII reminds me so much of you know who, it's

scary. Thanks for your info..

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

68. Except that Henry was educated and cultured. He wrote music and poetry

and actually understood his government. He was a despot and a shit to women, but he had a little class, at least, unlike He Who Shall Not Be Named.

[monmouth4]

70. Hahahaha, that is the truth. Henry and women, god help them...n/t

[wishstar]

76. One of my ancestors with Catholic leanings, Sir John Hussey was beheaded during reign of Henry VIII

Meghan Markle is also a direct descendent of John Hussey through Christopher Hussey who came to America.

The era of Henry VIII is fascinating but like with Trump, I would dread having any association with either one of those toxic megalomaniacs.

My Hussey ancestors in America were Quakers, fined for not observing Puritan church rules, but at least not executed.

[monmouth4]

77. Very interesting. Thanks for posting. Definitely would turn down any offers of coming to Court..nt

[Staph]

57. Many Protestants use the same phrase in their creed.

But it's lower-case catholic, in the sense of "universal".

[OldHippieChick]

60. The Apostles Creed in the Presbyterian

church, reads in part: " ... I believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy catholic church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and life everlasting."

This is similar in many Protestant churches, using the small "c"

[Ilsa]

89. Some denominations replace "catholic" with "universal" in the Apostles Creed.

The episcopal churches I visited used the Nicene creed in a lot of services.

[B2G]

27. I thought it was lovely.

Her grandkids are exceptional people.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

30. The Episcopalians know how to do ceremonies.

If you want something solemn, dignified and beautiful that's where you go if you're into church.

[wryter2000]

58. Thanks

We sure do

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

63. Yes - I've been involved in a few,

including my own wedding. Used to sing in an Episcopal cathedral choir, love the music and the ritual despite my agnostic tendencies.

[malaise]

71. Love it

[wryter2000]

85. Im also agnostic

My rector knows and doesn’t care. I’d go to my church if I were a confirmed atheist.

[malaise]

61. Tweety describes it best

high church

[Motley13]

33. In a prayer the priest said, was somthing to the Holy Catholic church

Episcopalians pray to the Catholic church?????

[sarisataka]

38. catholic- small 'c'

= universal

[Motley13]

41. Got it, thanks

[malaise]

39. Their services are very similar

Remember Anglicans are Church of England a split off from the Catholics and Episcopalians are the American split from the Anglicans.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

40. Small "c" catholic.

It's one of the so-called "Four Marks" of the church in the Nicene Creed, and refers not just to the Roman Catholic Church (although that's how they look at it), but to Christianity in general. As an adjective, "catholic" just means "all-embracing."

Applied to the church, the adjective "catholic" means that in the church the wholeness of the Christian faith, full and complete, all-embracing, and with nothing lacking, is proclaimed to all people without excluding any part of the faith or any class or group of people.The adjective can be applied not only to the church as spread throughout the world but also to each local manifestation of the church, in each of which nothing essential is lacking for it to be the genuine Church of Christ.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Marks_of_the_Church

[jes06c]

48. I'm Orthodox

and we recite it too, it's part of the Nicene Creed, and it predates the split of the Orthodox and Catholic Churches by centuries. I think "catholic" is the Latin word for "universal." I know that the Episcopalians and Lutherans recite it too.

My wife's family is Methodist, and when we went to her uncle's funeral a few years ago, I kind of remember hearing it recited there too, but I may be remembering wrong.

[malaise]

50. Greek and Ethopian Orthodox recite it

They all came from one source before the various splits/schisms.

[Ilsa]

90. Little c catholic is interpreted as "universal". nt

[enid602]

49. Stormy

It was kind of boring. I was hoping Stormy might crash it and sit right next to Mel.

[Rorey]

54. That would have been a great photo op

[malaise]

56. But she was sitting next to President Obama

No way - that's ridiculous

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

62. And she was smiling.

[Motley13]

64. Obama treats her a lot better than her maggot of a husband

being the gentleman that he is. I'm sure they pity her.

[Hekate]

75. President Obama is a real gentleman, well-mannered and kind. nt

[Hekate]

74. Thanks, Malaise and all of you for a lovely thread...

We've had so much ugliness here of late that this brought tears to my eyes, no kidding.

[malaise]

88. DUers are the best

They made the thread interesting