Went to a rally. I hate political rallies and smarmy candidates and pandering (even pandering to ME)
An obvious question, what am I doing at DU, one that has likely crossed many a DUer's mind for their own other reasons!1 Dibs on the question, so it's because I am a Dem, am dedicated to the Democratic world view, love the TRUE Dems and Democratic candidates.
It's the dirty, smarmy candidates and partisans and extroverts I detest.
So I've been to less than a dozen rallies over my voting life, for the candidates that really got my motor revving (while just only voting without physical participation for the other kind of candidates). Don't remember being at a Bill CLINTON rally, but went to one for EMK (speaker, not candidate), one for GORE, two for Hillary (one per each incarnation), one for KERRY (Teresa subbing for him; she was a real buzzkill), and the rest for undisclosed location types.
For starters I'm an introvert, am never otherwise in crowds (sports/concerts), a secular humanist (not a practitioner of congregational rituals), and all around detest smarmyness and pandering. Even when the pandering is to one of my home identities, like for me/veteran ("Let's have a hand for veterans, veterans stand up!1" ) .
So this rally was for a new candidate who is the first, most viable Democratic HOPE in decades in my state. Fits the profile for getting me away from the laptop.
But this is really about the thank-you-for-your-service thing. I and a few other vets here have posted about how we don't like it, for more than a couple reasons, for me: When it started during(?) the Shrub/IraqAttack era, it was mainly a Repuke chickenhawk thing, and the undercurrent message was that the thankful ones were pro-wars that they didn't enlist for therefore self-servingly "grateful" that we went instead.
When I retired (from my job, not from my 4 years regular Navy), I did the usual for new retirees, a couple of years of organizing a life of documents including military stuff and souvenirs, and started wearing my Navy/Vietnam ball cap and one of my original dog tags. This set up the thank-you-for-your-service thing and I went through stages of a few years' length each: First, I would say something like, "It was nothing," which amounted to confrontations. Next stage, because of some input here/DU and from friends/family, who said, "Can't you just be GRACIOUS and say you're-welcome?!1" so I worked my way around to that. But even with that accommodation I've made, I downplay the interaction, keep it minimalist and insignificant, no GUSHING, and change the subject immediately.
However, I *still* let the moment's context rule: Once while in a stint in a wheelchair and difficulty maneuvering the aisles in a store, I said to somebody who accosted me, "Can you please LET ME GET ON WITH MY LIFE?!1" And a few times in restaurants when hands are outstretched for handshaking, I refuse the handshake and say, "O.K., but I'm EATING right now!1"
I will never be *wholly* gracious.
So the ball cap and dog tag are 99% in my daily attire. Getting ready to go to the rally I was preparing for the inevitable veterans' pandering, and briefly let somebody's other suggestion pass through my mind, why not NOT wear the vet paraphernalia and avoid the problem? No, because I choose to have these things be PART OF ME and NOT have others decide for me.
So the incidents happened at this rally, but with NEW and unexpected guises. First, before the main candidate arrived, while us early arrivals were seated, some of the peripheral, smarmy and aggressive candidates were on the hunt, swimming through the rows to poach off the main candidate's draw of the crowd. A dude my age approached me, the scout for one of the smarmy ones, gave me cards for the candidate, shook hands, and did his darnedest to get me to ask him to bring his candidate over. I just responded to the greetings without any openings for more. Then he got snippy (to use Al GORE's word) and said, " (Candidate) is right behind you." I said, "O.K." and kept looking at my phone. Then he got ugly, as only some vets can be to others, and said, "*I* was in Vietnam, TOO!1" I said, "O.K." His implication was, I-saw-more-action-than-YOU-did!1 or some such. And he stormed off.
During the event itself, the veterans' acknowledgement wasn't too obtrusive, just a show of hands of veterans, not the standing stuff.
Next incident. After the speech and questions, I got in line to have a picture with the candidate. There were about 50 in front of me. No problem. I was waiting without any unease, when suddenly a young girl (college age probably, but to me LITTLE GIRL) appeared in front of me and said, "Do you want to go up to my place at the front of the line to have our picture taken with (the candidate) ? " I was startled, didn't get the veteran-angle, and said, "What?1 No, why?!1 " She said, "I'm way up near the front of the line and it'll be a lot faster for you." I said, "No, thank you." She said, "Come on, let's go!1" I said, "I'm in line like everybody else." So she left, totally smiling and unfazed.
This one took the cake: Further up in the line, there I was without expecting anything else. Suddenly (it's always SUDDEN), this young dude with barely a scraggly beard accosted me and blared, "THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE, SIR!1" We shook hands and I said, "You're welcome" and went back to my phone (excellent defense mechanism these years, phones). I sensed he was still there and looked up and he said, "Aw, heck, can I give you a HUG?!1" I was startled (again) and said, "NOoooo!1" My neighbors in line who had been the audience to the entire show laughed out loud. The dude still didn't leave and blared again, "THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE, SIR!1" and tried to shake hands again. I said, "O.K., look, you already thanked me," and didn't shake hands and he finally left.
I hate rallies. I hate in-person encounters with extroverts. I hate smarm and pandering. I hate being defined by others.
The good news is that the (main) candidate is top notch, pure Democratic GOLD (if the real deal). At our picture taking I said, "You seem to be the real deal. Issues are fine, but WINNING is the #1 thing. Without it, all the issues are out the window." Candidate put it back on me, saying, "Winning TOGETHER." Ouch.
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