Sebastian Gorka was right when he told Fox News that the Nunes memo would
be 100 times bigger than the offenses that kicked off the American Revolution.
When I saw that the memo from House Intelligence Committee Chairman Devin Nunes’s (R-Calif.) office had been released, I could not believe my eyes. I sat bolt upright in my long nightshirt and grabbed my flintlock musket. I ran to the window and threw up the sash (no, hang on, that is a different poem), hopped on my steed, and went galloping off to alert my brethren.
King George had done certain things, of course, that were not to be borne, but next to this memo, I was sure, they paled.
.....................................................................
“Up!” I shouted. “Up and arise, for when King George III was ‘at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny,’ he could not have hoped to compare to the information that I have here on six pieces of paper printed out from the Washington Examiner’s website!”
By the time I made it to Concord, the throng had doubled in size. “Grab your tea!” I shouted. “GRAB YOUR HORNS OF POWDER, GRAB YOUR MINUTEMEN, AND MEET ME IN THE HARBOR! THERE IS NO TIME TO WASTE!” I was somewhat mixing my metaphors, but this was to be expected in my excitement. “I have in my hand a memo that proves everything! All our worst fears are corroborated right here on this page!”
...........................................................................
“I’m confused,” a humble silversmith ventured. “Are we upset at the FBI because it was too mean to Hillary Clinton, or for a different reason? Is Carter Page supposed to be affiliated with the campaign or not? I thought the official narrative was that he once tried to bring them a coffee and they threw it in his face and said, ‘BEGONE, VILE STRANGER.’”
“It all adds up!” I tried. “The dossier! The memo! The texts! The insurance plan!” I hoped no one would notice that I was just saying a series of debunked nouns.
“You’re just saying a series of debunked nouns,” the silversmith said, “as if they prove something when you just line enough of them up in a row.”
“If this is so harmless, then why didn’t the Democrats want it to be released?” I asked. I had them there.
“Okay,” a townswoman said, “but even if we accept the premise that the FBI should not have used information from the Steele dossier as grounds to surveil Carter Page, a man whom the Trump campaign has repeatedly denied knowing, how is this grounds for ending the Mueller investigation?
= new reply since forum marked as read
