Things You'll Never Hear at a Teabagger Event

[HopeHoops]

Things You'll Never Hear at a Teabagger Event

Do these flag pants make my ass look big?

Could somebody please check the spelling on my sign?

I'm starting to think that maybe Reagan wasn't such a great president after all.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with having a black president.

Do the teabags hanging from my hat make me look dorky?

Come to think of it, "I'm teabagging for Jesus" really is a stupid sign.

Wait a minute. Bush is the one who caused the massive deficit increase. Why are we bitching about Obama?

Wow. Sarah Palin really IS a moron.

Can somebody loan me their copy of the Constitution so I can look something up?

I shop at a LOT of places other than WalMart.

No thanks. I don't like stuff from KFC.

There are a lot of beers other than Coors lite.

Maybe I should quit smoking. Cigarettes cost a lot more in a year than the taxes I'm bitching about.

I hate NASCAR.

Abe Lincoln wasn't one of the founding fathers.

I hate watching FOX News.

Maybe I'd save money by trading in my SUV for something that gets more than 5 mpg.

I think we should end the senseless wars and bring the troops home.

There are a lot of better things to eat than deep fried butter on a stick.

Shouldn't a protest involve more than walking from the parking lot to the grass with a stadium chair, a sign, and a beer cooler?

Dancing With The Stars is a really stupid show.

Truck Nutz are ignorant.

You know, the Koch brothers paid for all of this for their own gain, not ours.

Hey, man, don't Bogart the joint dude.

Jesus probably wouldn't approve of cutting social services for the poor.

Now that I think about it, I DID spend more for this silly colonial costume than I could save through tax cuts.

[Rex]

1. Wow...how did you channel a teabagger so well?

Mind link?

[HopeHoops]

4. "I got good and drunk the night before so I'd look and feel my best."

-- Arlo Guthrie, "Alice's Restaurant"

[Rex]

10. Muahahaha!

:rofl:

[Drale]

2. Anything intelligent what so ever nt

[Wounded Bear]

3. "Thanks for the tax cut, President Obama"....nt

[HopeHoops]

6. Ooh - good one! I'll add that to the text document. Thanks!

[SpiralHawk]

5. "The Newtie & The Donald lack a certain, um, a, gravitas or whatever"

eom

[TheCowsCameHome]

7. "I'm so glad I have all my natural teeth"

[TheCowsCameHome]

8. "I paid for this wheelchair and oxygen tank with my own money"

[TheCowsCameHome]

9. "You know, guns make me feel kind of uneasy" ,

[Rex]

12. Guns and explosives are not my way of expressing my inner deamon.

Nor do I take pride in running around looking like a GI Joe costume failure along with my beer buddies.

[TheCowsCameHome]

11. "All the folks here are so willing to help others without thinking of themselves"

[TheCowsCameHome]

13. "I really enjoy listening to what other folks have to say, even if I disagree"

[Rex]

14. President Obama is awesome and I will vote for him in 2012.

Also, he is an outstanding politican and worthy advesery to my shitty GOP party.

I will never wrap my entire body in a flag like material with a pattern of stars and bars of blue, white and red.





Zod, I could do this all day! :)

[TheCowsCameHome]

15. "Fox News really doesn't do a good job of reporting these events"

[johnnie]

16. .

"Oh, that's Joe over there...talking to LaQuesha".

[TheCowsCameHome]

17. "My goodness, look at all the minority groups that are represented are here today"

[Blue Owl]

18. "The overflow lot is that way"

n/t

[LonePirate]

19. Martin Luther King, Jr. is a personal hero of mine.

I'm glad the Union won the Civil War.

I believe the First Amendment is more important than the Second Amendment.

Supply-side economics is a discredited economic theory unsupported by real world evidence.

Yes, I can locate my state on a map of the United States.

The person I admire most is a lesbian and an atheist.

Education and health care for everyone are far more important than tax cuts for millionaires.

[Motown_Johnny]

20. Ya know, the original tea party folk dressed up like Native Americans, not like this.

[LastLiberal in PalmSprings]

21. Have you noticed we're all white, middle-aged and overweight? n/t

[LonePirate]

22. A few more ...

Like you, I also donated to Amnesty International.

Yes, I would like French fries with that.

I fully understand sarcasm and irony.

Have you ever noticed how many hypocrites are Republicans and vice versa?

If I wanted to vote for my economic best interests, then I wouldn't vote Republican.

Food stamps and unemployment benefits provide more economic benefit than tax cuts.

School vouchers are nothing more than welfare for the wealthy and class warfare aainst everyone else.

I work at the local Planned Parenthood facility.

Much of the recent weather extremes are the result of climate chane caused by human activities.

[izquierdista]

23. Bienvenidos!

Mucho gusto que tu puedes assistir.

[Initech]

24. "I have no idea what the founding fathers actually stood for."

[TheCowsCameHome]

25. "It's nice of the US government to share their land so we can protest against it".

[ZombieHorde]

26. "Let's get high and have sex in the street." nt

[Mopar151]

27. NASCAR is much better now!

What's really on their mind:
"NASCAR is no good since the tobacco money left. No more free cigs and dip at the races - WTF? And Jimmy Spencer was a real gentleman, who retired too early."

[Raschel]

28. Where'd you get your perm? (things you will hear)

[HopeHoops]

29. I considered doing a companion list of that nature.

[lame54]

30. "are you sure that's spelled right?"

[Courtesy Flush]

31. "I'd better verify the facts on this email before I forward it."

[damyank913]

32. Family trees work better with branches.

[HopeHoops]

34. OUCH!

[JoeyT]

33. So the other day I was reading this book.... n/t

[Erose999]

35. "Theres a long line for the portajohns."

[HopeHoops]

37. WHOA boy. Now THAT has implications! Well, Depends.

[Erose999]

36. Let me see the full video of this new Britebart story, and do some research before I pass judgement"