Obi-Wan Kenobi Is Dead, Vader Says

[SteppingRazor]

CORUSCANT — Obi-Wan Kenobi, the mastermind of some of the most devastating attacks on the Galactic Empire and the most hunted man in the galaxy, was killed in a firefight with Imperial forces near Alderaan, Darth Vader announced on Sunday.



In a late-night appearance in the East Room of the Imperial Palace, Lord Vader declared that “justice has been done” as he disclosed that agents of the Imperial Army and stormtroopers of the 501st Legion had finally cornered Kenobi, one of the leaders of the Jedi rebellion, who had eluded the Empire for nearly two decades. Imperial officials said Kenobi resisted and was cut down by Lord Vader's own lightsaber. He was later dumped out of an airlock.




More: http://www.galacticempiretimes.com/2011/05/09/galaxy/outer-rim/obi-wan-kenobi-is-killed.html#

LOL-worthy, I think

[edbermac]

1. Wasn't Obi-Wan killed when they blew up the Bridge On The River Kwai?

I'm very confused.

[uppityperson]

2. k&r I posted this earlier and got scolded, funny.

[SteppingRazor]

4. Aw, there's somebody that'll scold you over anything.

Bunch o' killjoys ;)

[Leopolds Ghost]

3. I demand to see the body. Are we to believe it just disappeared?

They claim that only the robes were preserved for intelligence-gathering purposes.

[ManiacJoe]

7. But there is official video of it happening!!!!

HD with color and sound even. :shrug:
Plus there were rebel witnesses.

[Leopolds Ghost]

8. That video was tampered with by George Lucas. The actual footage was taken 20 years earlier n/t

[jp11]

5. WOO HOO! GO 501st!

[NavyDem]

6. I'm Offended!

Obi-Wan was not dumped out of an airlock. That was Luke Skywalker! And Obi-Wan clearly surrendered! Extrajudical Killing!!!!!

[Warren DeMontague]

9. What the fuck did Palpatine ever do to Vader? NOTHING, that's what.

Shit, nothing except rescue him and stick him in a big walking humidifier.




And yet the kindly little old man with the 'gently smiling' (yellow) eyes was tossed down a reactor shaft. And he was unarmed; HE EVEN SAID SO!!!!