This Article Is NOT Satire

[lame54]

http://www.suntimes.com/business/savage/2464546,CST-NWS-savage05.savagearticle

here is no 'free' lemonade
In giving drink away, girls ignore rules of economics -- and sum up what's wrong with U.S.

July 5, 2010
BY TERRY SAVAGE Sun-Times Columnist
This column is a true story -- every word of it. And I think it very appropriate to consider around the Fourth of July, Independence Day spirit.
Last week, I was in a car with my brother and his fiancee, driving through their upscale neighborhood on a hot summer day. At the corner, we all noticed three little girls sitting at a homemade lemonade stand.

Three girls giving away free lemonade isn't cute, it's indicative of the lack of economic responsibility we're passing on to future generations.

We follow the same rules in our family, and one of them is: Always stop to buy lemonade from kids who are entrepreneurial enough to open up a little business.

My brother immediately pulled over to the side of the road and asked about the choices.

The three young girls -- under the watchful eye of a nanny, sitting on the grass with them -- explained that they had regular lemonade, raspberry lemonade, and small chocolate candy bars.

Then my brother asked how much each item cost.

"Oh, no," they replied in unison, "they're all free!"

I sat in the back seat in shock. Free? My brother questioned them again: "But you have to charge something? What should I pay for a lemonade? I'm really thirsty!"

His fiancee smiled and commented, "Isn't that cute. They have the spirit of giving."

That really set me off, as my regular readers can imagine.

"No!" I exclaimed from the back seat. "That's not the spirit of giving. You can only really give when you give something you own. They're giving away their parents' things -- the lemonade, cups, candy. It's not theirs to give."

I pushed the button to roll down the window and stuck my head out to set them straight.

"You must charge something for the lemonade," I explained. "That's the whole point of a lemonade stand. You figure out your costs -- how much the lemonade costs, and the cups -- and then you charge a little more than what it costs you, so you can make money. Then you can buy more stuff, and make more lemonade, and sell it and make more money."...

[trotsky]

1. Wow, does he ever give presents to anyone?

Give money to charity? Just give something to somebody for no Koresh-damn reason?

I'm glad you put that warning on there, because I would have sworn that was straight outta the Onion.

[Maru Kitteh]

37. She, not he. This hollowed out shell of a human being is a female.

[Silent3]

57. This article makes more sense with a picture of the author

[trotsky]

60. LMFAO!!!!!!

:rofl:
That is too freaking perfect.
:rofl:

[Pab Sungenis]

2. I kind of see where he's coming from.

The lemonade free, maybe, but not the chocolate bars. And the purpose of a lemonade stand IS to teach business and encourage entrepreneurial thinking.

If they don't want the money, maybe the kids should have hooked up with Alex's Lemonade Stand.

[eowyn_of_rohan]

6. Who 's to say what the PURPOSE of a lemonade stand is??

I have always thought of a lemonade stand as a lesson in entrepreneurism myself, but I think this is great - never heard of it, never seen this done before. Can THIS lemonade stand be teaching the children the value of giving and sharing without expecting anything in return? They COULD consider having a donation jar - with proceeds to be given to some charity. My mom always made me give money I made from such entrepreneurial endeavors to a local charity (which I accepted grudgingly). (edit: Accepted grudgingly but felt good once I submitted the donation :)

[surrealAmerican]

8. Do all lemonade stands need to have the same purpose?

Sure, these kids are not improving their math skills here, but they're learning about the people in their neighborhood.

[Canuckistanian]

12. That's YOUR interpretation

Why do all kids need to be indoctrinated into "business and entrepreneurial thinking"?

[reggie the dog]

20. I bought and resold weed as a kid

once I was 16 i went to chicago, bought a quarter pound for 250 dollars and resold it for 20 an eighth 40 a quarter 65 a half and 125 an ounce so that i only had to sell half to break even if i sold in bulk, i usually made a full gas tank profit and a carton of cigs and smoked a lot of grass for free, at least i had good business sense,

[TalkingDog]

27. Hey Reggie, Wanna see her head explode?

Just send her that posting...as it stands....that would be AWESOME!

[reggie the dog]

40. as much as i would love to

i think she would rat me out

[TalkingDog]

28. Hey Reggie, Wanna see her head explode?

Just send her that posting...as it stands....that would be AWESOME!

[Maru Kitteh]

41. First of all, you're wrong on principle. Refreshment stands are set up fr many reasons.

The Red Cross and other charities set them up in stressed and distressed areas and give food and refreshment away.

Charities set up refreshment stands at parks and fairs and other places as a form of community service.

School organizations sometimes do the same.

Neighborhood associations in my town sometimes show up at local parks and hand out free bottled water.

Our town is about to have an enormous classic car festival and any number or organizations will be there, handing out free cold water to sun-baked attendees. Some will offer free hard candies and such too. Most people who receive these free items will never know what group was handing it out or come into contact with them again, unless by chance they receive them again next year.

So the premise that all refreshment stands are intended to generate revenue is total bunk - but there are many more reasons why this woman who wrote the article was way, WAY out of line, even if we set aside for the moment the fact that she was yelling at little kids - for doing something nice.

How in the ever-loving-hell does she KNOW that the children did not buy the cups, the candy and the lemonade with their own money? She doesn't. They could have earned that money washing cars, throwing papers or doing chores. The stupid assed author made assumptions about the situation she had no right or cause to make.

Even if the cups and lemonade DID come from the parents, it is THEIRS to give to the children, and once they give it freely, it then BELONGS to the children. Does she grill other lemonade stand havin' children and interview their parents to make sure the children are paying them back for their cups and Kool-Aid?

The other reasons why the children may have been out there giving away lemonade are many, but let me take a stab at a couple that come to mind.

They were recently the recipients of some small kindness and decided to "pass it on."
They read about some similar act somewhere and were inspired.
They were bored.
They like their community and wanted to do something nice.
They've recently had a little trouble at home with the concept of sharing, and this stand was their parents idea.


Lemonade stands don't "encourage entrepreneurial thinking" unless the parents are complete jackwagons who force the kids to pay them back for the supplies. What should they do if the kids don't make enough to cover the cups and lemons? Foreclose on little Johnnie and Ashley's rooms? Run a repo on their bikes?

No. Stands don't encourage entrepreneurial thinking, they give kids something to do.

[WinkyDink]

44. Oh, YOU KNOW "the purpose of a lemonade stand"?! "PURPOSE"?! Lolololol!!

[fishwax]

62. no reason that a lemonade can't have a different purpose

They were giving away refreshments for holiday revelers--I don't see any fault to find with that, in and of itself :shrug:

[BrklynLiberal]

3. I hope that guy is never dying of thirst with no money in his pocket.

[WinkyDink]

45. Really? I had the opposite thought.

[BrklynLiberal]

58. I actually vote for YOUR thought!!

:thumbsup: :hi:

[Jim__]

4. Definitely should have thrown those 3 little girls in jail!

Why they're liable to bring the world economy crashing down around our heads!

[Iggo]

5. Fuck you, Terry Savage.

:hi:

[TomClash]

7. "The Savage Truth" - What a joke

First, the girls were giving away lemonade and candy bars their parents had given to them. It was now theirs to give.

Second, a lemonade stand has no costs to figure out if the parents are giving the products to the girls.

Third, it does NOT violate any economic laws to give products away, particularly excess production. Businesses do it all the time. Besides, the girls were having fun on a summer day, learning how to serve others and perhaps making a few friends along the way. They received something of value in return for the lemonade - new friends, a good feeling, camaraderie. Isn't that worth more than a candy bar?

This guy needs a course in both economics and life.

[Scuba]

14. +1

[markbark]

9. So....

This is a right winger advocating for more taxes as a way to pay for all the "free" services his government is providing him?
What's the problem here?

[Octafish]

10. Mammon thy name is Savage.

Moron's his middle name.

[Maru Kitteh]

42. The author is a female. n/t

[Ian David]

11. Obviously, the lemonade stand is just a cover for the child prostitution ring. n/t

[EstimatedProphet]

13. That has to be one of the most belligerently stupidest things I have ever read

I truly feel ashamed for the author.

[izquierdista]

15. And after he left

The three little girls, Paris, Nicole, and Lindsay, giggled and repeated what he said about "not theirs to give" and called the chauffeur so they could go to Nieman-Marcus.

[closeupready]

56. LOL, OMG, that's funny.

:rofl: :hi:

[Odin2005]

16. What a soulless jerk!

[deutsey]

17. Man, this jerk really needs to learn to relax a little n/t

[treestar]

18. What a moran!

To make such a big deal out of such a little thing.

Giving away their parents' candy bars! :rofl: How awful!

I guess if you start the lemonade stand for money, it's with your parents' seed money, hmmm, interesting lesson in class.

[unblock]

19. she obviously thinks the point of life and business is to gouge people

they were providing liquid on a hot summer day.

their actions were far more akin to a private charity or a local government "cooling center".


when people have a lack of balance in their lives, they see things through a single lens. she's a business/investor advice giver, so when she looks at an act of charity, she simply can't see it as anything other than a poorly run business that isn't charging enough.

[chrisa]

21. This can't be real.

It's like a bad (or good) right wing satire. This might even be sub-Rush, but it sounds par for the course of the garbage that comes out of his big mouth.

I would believe it that this could be real, but it's just so over the top and shockingly stupid.

[TalkingDog]

22. My email to [e-mail] (with a couple of notes lifted from this TomClash. thanks)

Subject: You are absolutely right, that IS what's wrong with America

Some presumptive white woman in an upscale neighborhood driving to a restaurant decides she is the arbiter of how other people choose to raise, teach and treat their children.



Well, turn about is fair play. Let me make a few presumptive judgments about how you choose to behave based on my ethics and mores.



Driving instead of walking or taking public transport: BP Lover



Upscale Neighborhood: Living off the sweat and labor of the under-classes. In addition, since Reagan instituted trickle-on economics, the wealthy have paid less in taxes than at any other time in history. So not only are you benefiting from labor you, yourself did not perform, you are failing to upholding your end of the social contract. You get a lot of breaks from the government that the rest of us poor schmucks don’t because we don’t have the money, power or influence to buy laws that benefit us. We carry your load in proportionally higher taxes based on dollars earned.



Valuing the idea of doing business “properly” over basic humanity: A rigid world view that does not allow for exploration, invention or creation.



i.e. how “Americans” do it or “my family” does it: Also leading me to imagine that you had a childhood replete with a lot of shame and guilt heaped on you by one or more parents whenever you exhibited behavior that went against their idea that childhood has the potential to be a time of both exploration outside societal norms AND learning of current mores and manners. But on the whole, indicative of the worst of American’s obsession with themselves.



Belittling others (your brother’s fiancée) by shouting her down for not subscribing to your world view: There is no other way to say it; Bitchy and Ill-Mannered. And rather along the lines of our last Administration. You’re a Tea Bagger aren’t you?



Sticking your head out of a car window to yell at and belittle children who were giving away things their parents worked for, but may have given their children permission to do or even given it to their kids as a task to teach them humility and service: Possibly in the midst of a psychotic break. Or, it is much more likely that you have Borderline Personality Disorder: marked by histrionic outbursts, paranoia and a compulsion to control. Since you are in your mid 60’s, there’s little possibility that you have a hormonal imbalance due to menopause. But since other illnesses can cause hormonal imbalance. You may want to get that checked out.



Flawed or absent critical thinking skills: If the girl’s parents gave them a (tax deductible) gift and the children choose to share, then by definition, the children were not giving away their parent’s candy, cups or drinks. And if the parent’s gifted the items to their children, wherein lay the costs? This draws the entire basis of your rant into question.



Benefitting from the pain and suffering of others without regard for their humanity: If you don’t believe in service, then why associate yourself with the NorthWestern Memorial Hospital Foundation? Unless that is a coldly calculated politically oriented business-move, with no real concern for the suffering of the people who come to the hospital... which would be yet another thing that is wrong with America.

[Contrary1]

26. Spot on!

:applause:

[Tsiyu]

51. Awesome response

She does appear to need some professional help.

Using small children as scapegoats for "what is wrong with America" smacks of some "issues" in this woman's mental state.

Kudos to you for trying to help her out :)

[Soylent Brice]

23. what a fuckwad.

just when you think people couldn't possibly be bigger assholes.

[Cresent City Kid]

24. I want to tell this guy exactly what I think

but I don't just give that information away. When his check clears, I'll tell him where to shove it.

[proteus_lives]

25. Very silly.

I can understand helping kids make money and learn about economics. I've helped my nephew figure-out how ask neighbors if they want lawns mowed, yard-work done, etc.

But there was nothing wrong with what the girls here were doing.

[Javaman]

29. terry savage is a sad little man.

he sounds like the kind of guy that enjoys pissing in the punchbowl.

When I was a kid we used to call guys like him, "a dick".

[Maru Kitteh]

43. Except you'd be calling HER a dick. Still appropriate.

And she may have pissed in a punchbowl or two.

[Javaman]

55. I stand corrected. She is a sad little woman. nt

[sofa king]

30. A rule to live by.

Anything starting with the line, "this column is a true story--every word of it..."

1) Most likely isn't; and

2) Is glurge that is certain to show up with an attached trojan horse in your inbox, forwarded to you by your Aunt Poughkeepsie.

[GeorgeGist]

31. Making money ...

is rather different than earning money.

[GeorgeGist]

32. Making money ...

is rather different than earning money.

[drm604]

33. So she's bothered that they're giving away something they don't own?

"No!" I exclaimed from the back seat. "That's not the spirit of giving. You can only really give when you give something you own. They're giving away their parents' things -- the lemonade, cups, candy. It's not theirs to give."

She doesn't like that they're giving away something they don't own, but she'd be okay with them selling something they don't own.

Is that Republican values these days?

[AngryAmish]

34. I was so glad when MSNBC fired him

[skypilot]

36. You're thinking of Michael Savage.

This is a different idiot altogether.

[skypilot]

35. I would bet money that none of this ever happened.

Right-wingers love to make up little stories and anecdotes that conveniently dovetail with some right-wing ideology or talking point of theirs. Nothing about this story rings true to me. The only thing that I'm convinced of is that this woman (and Terry Savage is a woman by the way) is an idiot.

[raccoon]

38. Right on! nt

[uncommon]

39. While I think...

that the free lemonade stand is very sweet - and sounds like something my 6 year old would enjoy (though she has an uncanny ability to make money already as a small child) - traditionally something like a lemonade stand really is a child's first introduction to the concept of business.

Businesses need to make money to survive, so hopefully the adults responsible for these children (if they be non-fictional) will explain that to them at some point.

[WinkyDink]

47. Perhaps charity is a larger lesson. Just sayin'.

[drm604]

48. Assuming that this is even a true story,

aren't you concerned with the horrible lesson that Savage was teaching them? She's implying that's it's wrong to give away something that they don't own, but a wonderful thing to sell something that they don't own.

[Maru Kitteh]

49. unless the parents are complete jackwagons who force the kids to pay them back for the supplies

then NO, it really isn't an introduction to the concepts of business. What should the parents do if the kids don't make enough to cover the cups and lemons? Foreclose on little Johnnie and Ashley's rooms? Repo their bikes? Put them into debtors time out perhaps?

What business gets it's supplies and overhead for free? No. Stands are not about entrepreneurial thinking, they give kids something to do.


As an aside:

How sick is it that the one thing you mention as a point of admiration about your child is her "uncanny ability to make money."

[LanternWaste]

50. A lemonade stand is to introductory business concepts as...

A lemonade stand is to introductory business concepts as...

a) camping trips are to post-apocolyptic survivalism.
b) a ten-year old's birthday party is to the establishment of cultural mores and a traditional ethical system within the context of a social setting set amongst one's peers.
c) Christmas morning is to foment an appreciation within the child for the Welfare State and Universal Healthcare
d) someone pissing down my back and calling it, well... lemonade.

You have twenty minutes to complete this portion of the test.




(I'm betting on d)... but then again, I enjoyed a childhood)

[Maru Kitteh]

53. Thanks for the belly laugh with lunch!

Bursting into uncontrollable laughter alone in the cafe was a little awkward, but that's ok, it was worth it. :rofl:

[LanternWaste]

59. I obviously do not deal with frustration very well.

:thumbsup:

Sometimes I let myself get frustrated... and I obviously do not deal with frustration very well. :evilgrin:

[WinkyDink]

46. THE WRITER IS A FEMALE. Carry on.

[BreweryYardRat]

52. Mrs. Savage reminds me of my mother. Maybe a little worse, but the same general personality type.

I sincerely hope Mrs. Savage has no children. Speaking from experience, no child should be raised by someone with that personality.

[Maru Kitteh]

54. Jeez. I'm sorry that happened to you. n/t

[Warren DeMontague]

61. What if a doctor volunteered to remove the stick from up her ass, for free?

would that be socialism? :shrug:

[cherish44]

63. I don't know...did she PAY for that stick that's so firmly lodged up her ass?

If she didn't, we have a whole other philosophical debate on our hands...