Congress Passes America is #1 Bill!

[joeybee12]

http://www.theonion.com/articles/congress-passes-america-is-1-bill,1574/

WASHINGTON, DC—With Wall Street booming, the U.S. military standing tall, and Mark McGwire kicking ass and taking names, Congress passed the Helms-Bayh "America Is #1" bill by an overwhelming majority Monday.

"My esteemed colleagues, all of us have long known that America is number one," said Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott, announcing the bill's 92-7 passage. "But now it is official. USA! USA! USA!"

Members of Congress cheer the passage of the Helms-Bayh bill.

Lott's statement, which was met with cheering, whistling and foot-stomping, was followed by the playing of Lee Greenwood's "God Bless The USA"—blared over the congressional sound system. As the song played, a group of senators hoisted Lott onto their shoulders and threw him in the air.

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Today is the Onion's Patriotic Issue...warning, the news there is only visible to REAL Americans!!!

:rofl:

[Dawson Leery]

1. ...

:kick:

[Angry Dragon]

2. The problem as I see it

is that I believe that some Senator could think that it would be good bill.
They would state that they had to do something to help the people

[Deep13]

3. "...the coolest cars...."

I'm afraid not.




Ferrari Enzo, Italy



BMW Z4, Germany



Aston-Martin Vanquish, Britain



Lamborghini, Italy



Nissan (Datsun) Z350, Japan



Bugatti Veyron, Italy

[OneTenthofOnePercent]

5. Saleen S7... Pretty amazing car by looks and by numbers.

Twin turbo Detroit V8... MMmmmm

0-60 mph (97 km/h): 2.8 sec
0-100 mph (161 km/h): 5.9 sec
0-200 mph (322 km/h): 27 sec
Quarter-mile: 10.5 sec
Top speed: 250 mph (402 km/h)

(For reference, that is MUCH faster than the Lamborghini or Ferarri... cheaper too)

[Deep13]

6. That's pretty fast.

I wonder if that is without smog control. I'm figuring the numbers for those European super-cars are without smog controls. I don't the Bugatti can reach its absolute maximum for 250 m.p.h. when fitted with Federally-required smog control.

I guess it's an American firm, though they seem to be hiding the fact on its website. Maybe there is a market-bias for European cars.

Supercars like this are definitely cool, but I would still rather have a front-engine, comfy car like one of those V-8 Astons. I drive a VW station wagon which is neither fast nor cool. It's still pretty nice and (so far) without the legendary German unreliability.

[rocktivity]

4. It doesn't get more quintessal than their

Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'

:rofl:
rocktivity

[azmouse]

7. Threw Lott into the air? hmmm....

I sure hope they missed catching him on his way down. :7