My father died of congestive heart failure in November of 1996...

[PCIntern]

(parenthetically, reportedly,he asked the nurse who won the election. She replied, "The President." He said, "Good." And never spoke another word in his lifetime - in my presence at least.

He had been hospitalized no fewer than eleven times for fluid crises...he always recovered. But the last time I saw him at about 3 AM in the ER, and when I said to him, "You'll be OK, you always get better.", he silently raised his hand and gave me a wave-off, signifying that he had had it and was tired of the whole mess. He died five or six days later.

If someone has the will to live, they'll quite possibly make it thru the crisis...if they don't, they'll just slip away into darkness and oblivion. Of course, each case is physiologically, psychologically, and metabolically different, but i'm just relating an anecdote of some importance to me.

[Mz Pip]

1. Sorry for your loss.

Maybe at some point in a serious illness we reach a point where it isn't worth the fight anymore. Of course there are times when all the fight in the world won't save you but I do believe that a strong will to live does make a difference. The mind is a powerful thing. You Dad sounds like he was quite a fighter to push through all those crisis.


I think my mom sort of just quit, too. She had high blood pressure and was on 4 different meds, each to conteract the side effects of the one before it. One day she got really sick from one of the meds. I called her doctor and he prescribed it in a different form. When I took the medication down to her room she told me the doctor could "shove it up his ass." That was the first time I ever heard my 85 year old mother swear. She was dead a couple of days later. I suspect she stopped taking all of her meds. Whether or she knew this would kill her, I will never know but I do know she was tired of dealing with the side effects of the medication and probably just didn't want to bother with it anymore.

I wish my mom had had more of your dad's fight. This was her first nasty drug reaction and she wasn't willing to even try another.

[PCIntern]

2. My parents both fought against entropy...

sorry to hear of your mom's plight...sometimes they don't realize the impact which their fight or lack of fight, has on us.

But it is what it is and we continue...

Best,

PC

[alterfurz]

3. my dad, too--

--back in 1995, after numerous bouts over 15 years...caught in the downward spiral of weakening circulation-->worsening pulmonary edema-->greater strain on an already weak heart...in the end, essentially drowning in his own fluids. A particularly ironic/karmic prognosis indeed for Dick Cheney, as it seems not too unlike waterboarding. While my own experience does make me feel some margin of pity for Cheney and his family, my better sympathies flow out to all his many victims. As for forgiveness, well, God knows we all need to give and get that, just some more obviously than others.

[w8liftinglady]

4. when my dad died,it was the same situation,in a way

he had cancer that was aggressive,and was on hospice.he saw my sister and I on saturday,died on Sunday,after he said all he had to say.It was bittersweet.I know he isn't suffering,and died in his own house,the way he wanted.