president george w. bush authorizes navy to fire on "oil looters"

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president george "dubya" bush, photographed with his friend and campaign "pioneer", bp ceo tony "premature oiljaculater" hayward, announced that he will "restore law and order" to the high seas as looters from texas to maine attempted to steal oil accidentally released from a bp well.

after the supreme court decision ruled that neither barack obama nor john mccain were "natural born citizens", the high court held in a 5-4 decision, that george w. bush remain president as the constitution provided for no replacement. "the founders could not have conceived of something as inconceivable as a close or contested election and therefore we must do as they originally intended, which would be to mimick what the british royalists would do. in this case, that's to keep president bush on until his death."

president bush assured hayward that, "just as if you were a truck driver carrying baby seals, if that truck accidentally overturned and the baby seals were trying to make a run for it, we would make sure that those baby seals were captured and returned to you. we would tear down every liberal house in the neighborhood to make sure your property is returned to you for clubbing at a time and location of your choosing. that's what freedom is all about. so, too, will every drop of oil be returned to you. after all, it's your oil."

[madrchsod]

1. do`t give the teabaggers anymore ideas.....lol

[zeemike]

2. Did you have a nightmare?

That is what it sounds like....wake up it is OK now.

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5. nightmare, yes. i'm awake now but i don't think it's ok....

[leveymg]

3. Every American knows his or her duty: "Reclaim, Recycle, Return", or else.

Now, hit those beaches . . . and, don't forget to do some shopping.

[rpannier]

4. and...

You're either for the tax cuts for people making 1,000,000 a year and more, or you are for Bin Laden and the Iranian Government

[Jamastiene]

6. WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA?

Don'cha know capturing that oil so BP stockholders can be paid and paid and paid is Priority #1™©® and anyone who disagrees with our fine president on this is an America hating, racist, president bashing FReeper?

Don'cha know our guv'mint can do no wrong?

Get with the New & Improved DU Pro Polluting/Pro Earth Maiming Pro Corporate GroupThinking Orwellian Program™©® right now or else, soldier!

Well, SOMEBODY had to go ahead and say it. That IS the new rule around these parts lately.

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7. daswudahm tawkinabout!

[Jamastiene]

8. I hear ya.

It's crazy around here lately.