Sorry state of affairs: An open apology to private corporations that have been wronged

[marmar]

By MarketWatch


CHICAGO (MarketWatch) -- I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I asked BP to clean up a few barrels of oil that leaked into the vast Gulf of Mexico. I'm sorry I made Toyota recall its cars just because some of them had minor mechanical difficulties. I'm sorry I shook down Union Carbide for a little gas accident in India.

I'm also sorry I asked for my money back at the Safeway because it sold me some rotten fruit. I'm sorry I demanded that AT&T send me a rebate for the savings it promised me when I moved to their phone service. And I'm so very, very sorry that I ever sent any of my purchases back to Amazon just because they sent the wrong item.

But I'm not sorry for Joe Barton, the Texas Republican congressman who also apologized to BP Thursday at a House hearing for the horrid way in which the White House is "shaking down" the oil giant for $20 billion that must go into a fund to compensate victims of the massive spill -- "a tragedy of the first proportion," he called it

No, I'm thankful to the good gentleman from the Lone Star State -- which by the way does all of us Americans a great service by pumping out the oil it does to keep our great corporate economy humming -- for reminding us of the important duty we have as U.S. citizens to honor and respect all private corporations and never, ever make any demands of them.

I'd forgotten that private companies cannot do their best work when fettered by things like laws and regulations. No doubt if BP hadn't had to deal with the government to get permits to build its rigs in the deep water of the Gulf this tragedy would never have happened.

How did we lose our way in this country like this? How have we forgotten that private corporations for years gave us so much, for instance the ability to employ children in textile mills, children who would have had no other opportunity to work, or to be sold delicious meat right off the slaughterhouse floor that otherwise might have been thrown away just because of a little dirt?

Well now we have Joe Barton to lead us back to those days of yore when our values were still righteous. I'm sorry he didn't speak up sooner.

-- Steve Kerch, assistant managing editor


http://www.marketwatch.com/story/a-sorry-state-of-affairs-for-private-corporations-2010-06-17

[valerief]

1. Shoot me again, Mr. Cheney. I deserve it. nt

[Nite Owl]

2. That was good.

Afraid some on the right won't see the satire, it is what they believe and want.

[EFerrari]

3. Very nice!

LOL

[Laelth]

4. Spot on satire. Well done. Thanks for posting. n/t

:dem:

-Laelth