'Scar My Tattered Body No More With Your Punishing Dildo Mallet': (TPM- militia) *Workplace warning*

[chill_wind]

'Scar My Tattered Body No More With Your Punishing Dildo Mallet': Accused Militia Plotter Bared Almost All In Film (VIDEO)

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/04/scar_my_tattered_body_no_more_with_your_punishing.php

Beyond that, I don't even know what to say.

[Lance_Boyle]

1. Now that's what I call DIALOGUE!

Are you listening, romance writers?

[wtmusic]

2. OMG the photos...they put the "ug" in "ugly". nt

[joeybee12]

3. Come on...who here HASN'T used those exact words at least a few times?

:P

[chill_wind]

5. I know!

lol

[wtmusic]

10. LOL busted

Thanks JB, humility check! :blush:

[blondeatlast]

18. why, the kids today use it all the time. In fact, I've taken it up in order to be hip. nt

[arcadian]

4. Dildo Mallet!

I can't stop saying it!

[chill_wind]

11. Me either :-)

[neverforget]

14. Sounds like a good band name or next Republican fundraising event.

[awoke_in_2003]

16. and hear I thought...

Dildo Mallet was a nickname for Krauthammer :)

[Solly Mack]

6. Shouldn't that be 'Scar my tattered body no more with your punishing dildo mallard'?

you know - half-man, half-duck.

I got nothing else to say. I'm gonna go turn on some lights and chase the dark away now.

[Lance_Boyle]

7. missing comma?

'Scar my tattered body no more with your punishing dildo, mallard!'

I can see this being a very popular phrase around the interwebs in short order.

[Solly Mack]

9. LMAO That'll work even better!

[emulatorloo]

21. Exposure to too many "Mallard Filmore" comics could explain a lot of this Militia nonsense

don't you think?

[MilesColtrane]

8. Dildo Mallet? What a freak!

Everybody knows they're called Cock Hammers.

[Contrary1]

15. !

:spray:

[Demoiselle]

19. Dildo Mallet will be the hero of my next novel.

If I ever get around to writing it.

[joeybee12]

22. A suave, sophisticated, take-no-prisoners kind of guy...all the women

want him, all the men want to be like him.

[Demoiselle]

23. You got it, joeybee. Now for a plot! Espionage or noir gumshoe?

[chill_wind]

24. I'm naming my next-born after him.

[KittyWampus]

31. wait, are you sure Dildo Mallet is a man?

[n2doc]

12. Then the going gets weird

The weird turn pro. Where's Hunter S Thompson when we need him? Somebody needs to step up here and take his place as journalist for these things!

[maxrandb]

13. Let me guess...A Rush Fan??????

[progressoid]

17. Dang, video has been removed.

[chill_wind]

26. It's back- and it's

really really disturbed...

youtube had removed it again- violation of TOS

[progressoid]

38. Umm...thanks?

Violation of a lot more than just TOS. :scared:

[Quantess]

29. The video is now at the TPM link.

I just suffered through it.

[progressoid]

39. Yeah, I fast forwarded to the end.

There really is no reason for me to waste too much of my life with that.

[chill_wind]

20. "The film -- shockingly puerile, yet strangely compelling- "

rof Zachary Roth!

[Adsos Letter]

25. Robert Frost?

[MilesColtrane]

27. I have to applaud him.

Now THAT'S really laying the groundwork for an insanity defense.

[KittyWampus]

28. anyone want to do some armchair psychoanalysis on that?

[Quantess]

30. I would be curious to know

whether he has ever called anyone else an art ***.

[PCIntern]

32. I CAN'T BELIEVE I WATCHED THAT FUCKING THING...

A new low in Internet wasted-time..."strangely compelling" said the TPM review...

"Yich"...says PCIntern..."Beyond stupid"

[anigbrowl]

41. Are you kidding? that was the most epic thing ever

It is, indeed, beyond stupid. That's what makes it so incredibly epic.

I may print t-shirts. Imagine when this is played in a federal court, because I absolutely guarantee you it will be.

[Saphire]

42. I can't believe someone MADE the thing.

[chill_wind]

45. I can't believe ANYONE made the thing. n/t

[Codeine]

33. I have that exact phrase tattooed across the small of my back.

True story!

[denbot]

35. Duzy!!!

:spray:

[LostInAnomie]

34. Well, they must be doing it wrong.

Dildo mallets aren't made for punishment. You need a dildo miter saw for that.

[chill_wind]

36. Best of the comment section:

"No really Josh, come on now...this whole militia was really just a cover for a meth lab. Right? Cuz, that is the ONLY way this abomination of a video got produced--they're meth heads and drunk on anti-freeze from the F150. I can see it now, as Kris and his family and friends are sittin in front of their teevee goin, "that is a great piece of art, Kris" and, "damn, that is mighty fine actin..." and so on.

Uh, right?"


****************************

"Michigan needs jobs, and fast."

********************************

"I think the duck is a metaphor."

********************************

[Brickbat]

37. All the other militias have got to be facepalming right about now.

Because seriously, that is just not the -- ah -- face you want to be putting on the militia movement. :rofl:

[anigbrowl]

40. Well, that just made his attorney's job a hell of a lot easier

My client, your honor, is a certifiable loon...as proof, I invite the court to join me in a viewing of his film...Duck Head."

Kris sickles has just achieved internet immortality. He is the new face of epic fail.

[Saphire]

43. that has to be the best post title.....evah!!!!

[Warren DeMontague]

44. This has GOTTA be an April Fool's joke.

..c'mon.


...really?

[chill_wind]

46. Sadly no, it seems.

It is still there today and linked on TPM's main page.

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/

[mod mom]

47. WTF was that? Just saw it and I'm speechless. Hope drug testing was done on militia members.

That is some messed up video.

[lame54]

48. Ed Wood would be proud

[peekaloo]

49. Leonard Pinth-Garnell presents Bad Farthouse Cinema

wow

[rox63]

50. That is easily the most bizarre thing I have ever seen on the intertubes

:wtf:

[ZombieHorde]

51. That clip was better than a lot of movies I have seen. nt