In anticipation of the DUZYs tomorrow....

[hang a left]

Have you been funny enough in your postings?

Have you kept a high level of snark?

Who will you be wearing to the awards?

Who will you be "doing" for the awards?

What color is your limo?

And if you don't mind, we will have a "blue carpet"! Kay?

[hang a left]

1. Frankly, I an not looking forward to an award this week

however I did nominate someone.

Since I am only going to be in the audience, I am wearing Armani.

[NanceGreggs]

2. I'll be wearing ...

... a Bathrobe designed by "Vinny".

According to Brian Williams, if I have bathrobe, a modem, and an opinion, I can put him out of business.

So I'll be trying my best tomorrow night at the awards ...

[hang a left]

3. You funny nt

[NanceGreggs]

4. Funny enough for a DUzy?

It doesn't hurt to ask ...

[hang a left]

5. Hey look....

I have no connections with the academy.

I could have my people call your people if we hear any buzz.

But, from what I have heard it is all on the down low, the QT, and the hush hush.

I know nothin'

It is really up to the academy members to nominate and vote.

So please, call your agent!

[NanceGreggs]

6. Call my AGENT???

Whadda I look like, like I'm made of money?

My agent (very, very, VERY long distance) will put me on hold for twenty minutes, during which time I have to listen to muzak versions of Stairway to Heaven and You've Gotta Fight for Your Right to Party, after which his 'girl' will get on the line and say, "Thank you for holding,", after which I will be left on hold for another twenty minutes.

Then my agent will finally pick up, talk to me for TWO (if I'm lucky) minutes, all the while referring to me by somebody else's name, at which point he'll cut me off because he has a more important client calling in on another line, who turns out to be the kid from the "Hey, Mikey" commercials -- and NOT even Mikey, but the kid in the background -- and he'll explain to me that this kid (who's now seventy-one, but with the botox and what-not could easily pass for sixty) will be ALL THE RAGE at tomorrow's DUzy ceremony because HE'S wearing a VINNY BATHROBE, and when am I going to get with the program.

Some Fridays it just don't pay to get out of bed ...

[hang a left]

9. Here is what I'm thinking

I personally know Vinny's cousin, kay. I know for a fact he does "LINED" robes in fabrics Vinny is too cheap to buy.

So here is what I'm thinking. Drop the agent. He's no good for ya.

You and me, we'll sign a little contract, kay. I'll represent cha, you wear the robes.

[NanceGreggs]

10. Is you long distance ...

... or is you local?

Can I call collect?

[hang a left]

15. Absolutely!

Call collect anytime. Just not between the hours of 12:00AM and 12:00PM. Please use wire transmission otherwise.

Looking forward to your business,

Ima Sheister

[SoCalDem]

7. FIRST rule of DUzy

Never talk about DUzy ..capiche??

[NanceGreggs]

8. sorry ...

... i forgot.

:blush:

[SoCalDem]

12. Now we have to kill you..

It's nothing personal, though :)

[Kurovski]

22. Don't the DUzy's always kill?

:-)

[orleans]

11. are you sure that's the first rule? got a link? n/t

:evilgrin:

[SoCalDem]

13. here

www.donttalkaboutthisorwellkillyou.com

[orleans]

19. oh...my...god...

Internet Explorer cannot display the webpage
Most likely causes:
You are not connected to the Internet.
The website is encountering problems.
There might be a typing error in the address.
Or you might already be dead!

ahhhhhhhhhhh.................................

[NanceGreggs]

14. See Post #12 ...

... can't respond.

DEAD POSTER WALKIN' ...

As you read this, I sleep with the fishes ...

[hang a left]

16. I am very concerned that people have not

noticed this very important post.

[Hubert Flottz]

17. I'll just say that George Bush is about as popular as a stale dog fart...

and let the chit fall where it may...that is all...

[hang a left]

18. Quit joking around now.

We are talking about the DUzys

I would expect us to remain serious.

[hang a left]

20. Since the DUzys have been delayed due to weather...or not:

I think it is only righteous that I kick my thread. Here is your last chance for an award.

[Wetzelbill]

21. I'm planning on getting ripped off

then feigning a show of class at my loss, but in reality I'll be fuming, so I'll get drunk and take it out on my family. If I had a family.

[sutz12]

23. I'm afraid I've had an off week...

But I'll be wearing jammies, a robe, and of course by best towel.

My limo is sky blue pink.