***DUzy Awards for week ending April 20, 2007***

JeffR

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Fri Apr-20-07 05:43 PM
Original message

Welcome to this week's DUzy Awards, honoring high hilarity, hellacious hijinks and heroic horseplay from this week on DU. Congratulations to this week's winners!

The oddly respectable DUzies will be announced every Friday, if I get around to it. Previous awards can be found in my journal.

Note to Mods: Skinner has authorized the DUzy Awards to be posted in GD.

Special thanks this week to Lars39, babylonsister, Buzz Clik, troubleinwinter, Kurovski, BushDespiser12, stellanoir, The Count, MsKandice01 and NanceGreggs for their invaluable assistance.

On a thread by kpete:

Verizon has taken out a patent on the Internet. All of it.

response #9 by givemebackmycountry:

OK...and you know what?
I just masturbated.
I'M GOING TO PATENT THE ORGASM!

I'm gonna make money coming and going!

GD, April 13, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x651763

On a thread by Zandor:

Bush Renews Call for 'Culture of Life'

response #6 by Xipe Totec:

Fine. Get him a petri dish, agar, and one of Wolfowitz's socks
Let him grow his own culture.

LBN, April 13, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2806498

OP by icymist:

By the way, did you know that Imus got fired?
I turned on the news last night and found out that Imus got fired! Every single story related to Imus getting fired. There was the 6.0 earthquake when Imus got fired in Mexico City. The New Jersey Governor got seriously injured in a car wreck after Imus got fired. Did you know that the Bush administration erased emails and Imus got fired? A week after Senator McCain stressed how the surge is making Iraq safe, a bomb exploded in the green zone in Baghdad and Imus got fired. There was the preacher's wife that murdered her husband and Imus got fired. What happened to Imus's hat, not to mention those tasteless bandannas, after he got fired? That terrible rapper Snoop Dog made Imus say those nasty things and then Imus got fired! The news has been canceled (again) because Imus got fired! All the reporters are acknowledging that the message is understood to their mega-corporate bosses in the propaganda ministry that Imus got fired. If you like your cushy job in the big fluffy chair you journalists better understand that Imus got fired!

:sarcasm: :banghead: :argh:

GD, April 13, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x649663

On a thread by bicentennial_baby:

I deleted over 9,000 emails last night!
No joke...That's what happens when you don't delete anything for 4 years or so... :P

Only took a few hours though :crazy:

Maybe someday I'll do that with my DU inbox....Oh, wait... :rofl:

:hi:

response #1 by Jade Fox:

The Bush Administration has a job for you!
Call Karl immediately. ;)

The Lounge, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6416585

On a thread by BOSSHOG:

      142 years ago today, President Lincoln went to the theater

response #2 by TahitiNut:

      Too bad Chimpolini McCodpiece can't possibly sit still when someone else is on the stage.
:evilgrin:

response #5 by Journeyman:

      Most serious Lincoln scholars are in agreement. . .
if the 16th President had not been assassinated that evening, he'd be dead now.

response #6 by Monkeyman:

      History Never Changes But Boss is old enough to remember LOL

response #9 by BOSSHOG:

      I was going to the play that night
but I gave up my tickets.

response #14 by Itchinjim:

      Didn't I read somewhere on DU that Bush 41 was in the audience....
on that fateful night?

response #15 by NightWatcher:

      yea, but he can't remember it if you ask him
....kinda like Dallas, hmmmmm

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x653682

On a thread by SaveElmer:

      CBS Poll: Clinton leads Obama by 15...

response #38 by Hardrada:

       I might go to church again if Hillary is defeated!
And Edwards or Obama gets the nomination.

response #39 by SaveElmer:

      Maybe you should go before...nt

response #53 by Hardrada:

      No, I need proof of God's existence.

response #9 by gulliver:

      She's the odds-on favorite to replace President Dean ...
... in Universe 42.

GDP, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3216137

On a thread by madfloridian:

Christian conservatives say Dean redefining Easter by leaving out word "Jesus"

response #9 by jobycom:

Here, let me write the message they really wanted Dean to give.
Easter is a time when we white Christian people rally around our Lord and Warrior King, Jesus Christ, and more importantly, around the truths that many of us assume are actually in the Holy Bible. On this day we reflect on how pathetic we find all non-Christians, and how non-White people by the exclusionary grace of Jesus's love can become almost as supreme as us. We ask all white American Christians to pray for God's coninued love and protection, and to give thanks to all the less desirable non-white people He has given us to fight our wars for us. We extend our warmest blessings and greetings to all of those in the world unfortunate enough to not be born white, American, Christian, conservative, and a member of our church. We close with the words of our Holy Scripture: Do what we tell you, or Jesus will kick your ass. Gospel of Ronald, 12:6.

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x653466

On a thread by maddezmom:

Cheney Berates Democrats on War, Policies Attacked as 'Far-Left Platform' of McGovern Era

response #15 by laststeamtrain:

'Left' of Cheney is a big, big place n/t
:evilgrin:

LBN, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2806915

On a thread by babylonsister:

Debunking Bush’s Whoppers On Pork

response #1 by lligrd:

If Bush Were Really Worried About Pork
He'd start by removing Rove from the White House.

GDP, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3216308

On a thread by sabra:

Shell ready to return to Iraq after 35 years

response #4 by 1932:

Mission Accomplished

LBN, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2806987

On a thread by Thankfully_in_Britain:

George Bush and Gordon Brown in first meeting
"Chancellor Gordon Brown has had private talks with US President George W Bush, American officials have confirmed..."

response #4 by DavidD:

Brown reported pale and shaking after meeting
Heard muttering, "My God! My God!"

LBN, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2806820

On a thread by Bluebear:

      DON HO has died,
Mahalo, Don.

(No Don Imus or Ho references, please! :)

response #1 by rurallib:

      If there is a God (S)He has a sense of humor.

response #10 by PaulHo:

      Should I be worried? n/t

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x656551

OP by marmar:

      I miss Katherine Harris.....
Admit it, politics lacks a certain amount of crazy without her around.... Part of me hopes she announces a bid for the Repug nomination in 2008.....

:crazy: :crazy: :crazy:

response #1 by seasat:

      Yeah, I miss both of her
:evilgrin:

response #6 by scarletwoman:

      What? Michelle Bachman and Jean Schmidt aren't ENOUGH crazy for you?
Heck, moosh the two of them together and you've GOT Katherine Harris!

response #7 by marmar:

      True, Bachman and Schmidt are a breakdown away from a room with padded walls....
they're just not as funny as Katherine Harris.

response #10 by scarletwoman:

      *sigh* Some people just have impossibly high standards...
;-)

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x656986

OP by krispos42:

      A thought about Republicans in jail
The politicians, that is.

Once they get rolling on the trials, there will be enough Repubs in jail to form their own gang.

The Mexican Mafia, the Aryan Brotherhood, the Nazi Lowriders, the Texas Syndicate, and the newest gang, the 'Pub Posse.

Composed entirely of soft, puffy, bombastic Republicans, the members of the 'Pub Posse will have to sleep with either their stock portfolios or Bibles duct-taped over their asses every night if they want to avoid... unpleasantness...

:rofl:

response #3 by whistle:

      I like the gang name "Re-thug Posers"

response #5 by pscot:

      How about "The Tennis Team"
n/t

response #6 by Cirque du So-What:

      The Dead-Ender Doughboys
Somebody stop me before I paint myself into an alliterative corner without the proper adverb to set me free!

response #13 by hootinholler:

      The Back Nine Boyz? n/t

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x656561

On a thread by seafan:

Medical System Runs Risk Of Nationalization, Gingrich Says

response #19 by fshrink:

Millions of Americans run the risk of being covered. nt

LBN, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x655202

On a thread by Bluebear:

McCain: "I can't think of a fallback 'Plan B' if our Iraq strategy fails."

response #5 by Old Crusoe:

"If I don't catch any fish, there just won't be any dinner."
I'm betting the farm, the acreage, the tools, the tractor, and Aunt Louise on certain victory in the Lottery."

"I doubt if I could find the left side of my own ass with a 3-way mirror and a spotlight."

VOTE JOHN McCAIN in the Republican Primary.

GD, April 14, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2807201

On a thread by rec_report:

What was the day of greatest traffic for DU, in hits/posts? (Just curious!)

response #3 by enigmatic:

The first time California Peggy said "Fuck"!
:D

The Lounge, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6419144

On a thread by madfloridian:

Pulitzer prize winning Fox analyst: If you can't handle Fox, you can't handle the Iranians..

response #1 by NormanYorkstein:

Fine - I don't want Iran sponsoring the Democratic debate!
Fair enough?

GD, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x657378

On a thread by UTUSN:

HITCHENS to become U.S.Citizen. Who will he vote for!!1

response #2 by laststeamtrain:

Not sure. List might include: Jack Daniels, Jose Cuervo, Old Overholt,...
all write-ins. Depends if he can make to the polling place.

GD, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x659339

On a thread by rodeodance:

Cheney hasn't called Libby since trial

response #10 by bleever:

"Oh...uh, hi Scooter, it's Dick. Say, I was wondering if I could get my CDs back?"
"Make sure not to leave out Best of Bread. Oh, and I'll need that quilt I got from my aunt....So...how's it goin'?...Doin' okay?...look, gotta run, but just messenger my stuff over, and, uh, you know...take it easy."

LBN, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2808279

OP by Lucygirl:

      Cheney BURPS On National Television - Face The Nation
About 20 minutes ago VP Cheney in his interview with Mr. Scheiffer let out a burp mid-sentence.

Hey Fat Bastard lay off the Jimmy Dean sausage for breakfast before you do an interview. It's "irresponsible." Ever hear of Gas X? Or was that simply more hot air flying out of your mouth. I suppose he now will blame the Democrats for his burp. What a piece of work.

response #3 by The Count:

      How did you even notice? Was it different from his other utterances? Less vicious
maybe?

response #7 by JackDragna:

      Those weren't sausages.
He ate a plateful of preschoolers for breakfast. They make one quite gassy.

response #40 by wryter2000:

      He couldn't be much worse than Bush
Remember that a-hole chewing with his mouth open in Germany? I feel like I have to send apologies to whomever he visits abroad.

Dear Your Majesty, Queen Elizabeth,

I write to express my dismay at my "President's" behavior while visiting you recently. I hear he destroyed several of your prized rose bushes. I only hope he didn't drop any of the corgis. Please know that he's a source of deep embarrassment to all decent Americans. Please also know that there are a few of us left.

Sincerely,

Dear Chancellor Merkel,

I have no words sufficient to express my horror after watching the buffoon who calls himself President of the United States manhandle you during his recent visit to Germany. Please consider this note my permission to go upside his head if he ever tries anything like that again.

Sincerely,

P.S. If you do go upside his head, please tape it so we can all watch.

response #16 by SalmonChantedEvening:

      Cheney tried to contain the burp, but it had other priorities.
:smoke:

response #52 by Ghost in the Machine:

      He ran out of deferments?
:shrug:

response #59 by MetaTrope:

      That was John McCain's soul escaping
But I doubt it'll find its way back home.

Other funny emissions in the thread...

GD, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x659255

OP by ih8thegop:

      Highlights from Free Republic 'Ask Me Anything' threads!
"Just lost my radio show - ask me anything"

"Halfway through my prison term! Ask me anything."

response #5 by NNadir:

      I just got in a gun fight with the ATF. Ask me anything.

response #7 by KitchenWitch:

      I have broken appliances strewn across my front lawn - ask me anything.

response #8 by Deep13:

      "I'm screwn! Ask me anything."

response #36 by AllegroRondo:

      "my mom's out of the house for 3 hours - ask me anything!"

response #45 by BlueIris:

      I managed to get an account at DU, ask me anything!!!
$kinner has no idea!!! I will make them pay.

response #60 by Deep13:

      I refuse to pay to get Tiny Tim's leg fixed. Ask me anything!

response #94 by Radical Activist:

      I'm an expert on how false F 9/11 and An Inconvenient Truth are but I haven't seen them.
Ask me anything!

A Porta-Potty full of other great responses in the thread...

The Lounge, April 15, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6422249

On a thread by LiberalFighter:

      Quayle family sells Indiana newspaper
"The family of former Vice President Dan Quayle has sold its newspaper holdings to Paxton Media Group, ending more than 70 years of ownership of the northeastern Indiana daily..."

response #1 by ThingsGottaChange:

      Too many typos? nt

response #7 by tanyev:

      Typoes.
:)

response #4 by slampoet:

      They sold it after the last family member who knew how to read passed away....

LBN, April 16, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2809919

On a thread by sabra:

      Cheney rewrites "last throes"
"In response to Schieffer's suggestion that Cheney's 2005 remark that the Iraq insurgency was in its 'last throes' might make some dispute his optimistic take on the war going forward, the vice president suggested his comments lacked hindsight..."

response #4 by KansDem:

      So what is it now? "Next to last throes?" "Almost last throes?"
Or how about the more official sounding, "Penultimate throes."

response #5 by rurallib:

      Throe-backs?

response #7 by lonestarnot:

      Just throe it under the damn bus.

GD, April 16, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x664925

On a thread by DeSwiss:

      Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder, And Apparently Hornier Too
"WASHINGTON (April 14) - Students who took part in sexual abstinence programs were just as likely to have sex as those who did not, according to a study ordered by Congress..."

response #4 by WCGreen:

      That's a good thing....
Teach the kids what they are missing and then turn 'em loose...

response #7 by DeSwiss:

      Exactly!!!
Abstinence Teacher: Okay kids, today we will be discussing P*ssies and D*cks. Now the P and the D aren't to be played with (hehe). You must never touch yourself down there, nor allow yourself to BE touched down there. And when you go to the bathroom, use tongs. Ahhh, yes?

Nerdy Student: {frantically waving hands} My Momma told me that sex was dirty. Is that true?

Abstinence Teacher: Of course it is. Filthy and vile and disgusting. Its terrible. I don't know how we've survived all this time having to do such ungodly things to each other.

Nerdy Student: Like what?

Abstinence Teacher: Please take out your hymnals while we sing, "Can't Nobody Do It Like Jesus." Amen!!!

I'm sorry but I had to laugh at myself!!!! :rofl:

response #3 by AtomicKitten:

      "It works like this, see."
"The train moves, not the station."

*** Jon Lovitz as Ernie Capadino in "A League of Their Own."

response #9 by :

      Or in this case....
...the train is "delayed" and the station is "mothballed."

That is until the correct fare is paid: one wedding ring.

:7

GDP, April 16, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3219279

I'm violating my policy of not excerpting anything from locked threads. But just this once.
On a locked thread by Tin Man:

      So long DU (this place is whack)

response #3 by librechik:

      Tin Man. I think I'll miss you most of all
sniff

see you over the rainbow

response #13 by Moochy:

      DU never did give nothing to the Tin Man, that he didn’t already have
:rofl:

GD, April 17, 2007

OP by jpgray:

      If you were to invade the Lounge, what sort of postwar planning would you need?
:shrug:

response #1 by xchrom:

      dance music and beer -- oh and bright shiny things for me.

response #2 by Nickster:

      None silly. They would gladly shower me with flowers and chocolates for being
their liberator!

response #3 by dolo amber:

      Beer and Funyuns
:thumbsup:

response #12 by SouthoftheBorderPaul:

      Gees....
I hope some mouthwash too. :puke:

response #15 by dolo amber:

      This is the Lounge; we ain't that classy
Perhaps you should take your Volvo-drivin', latte-sippin', mouth-a-warshin' ass to GD. :patriot:

response #5 by LSK:

      freedom dust
It worked in Iraq, didnt it?

:shrug:

response #8 by NoPasaran:

      A battalion of crack troops to guard the Ministry of Copycat Threads
Strict rationing of dingbats.

Abolition of hygiene standards for moderators ("de-bathification")

response #11 by rug:

      Mods with tasers.

The Lounge, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6427077

On a thread by sabra:

State Dept. responds to Waxman re: Niger docs - give excuse Bush said "Africa" not "Niger" in SOTU

response #1 by Bornaginhooligan:

Ha.
As if they're going to put the word "Niger" on Bush's teleprompter.

GD, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x685130

On a thread by Blackhatjack:

Meanwhile Gonzales Is Still Searching For the Consistent Unifying Explanation for His Corrupt Action

response #2 by DCKit:

"Consistant Unifying Explanation" is SO close to "CLUE" n/t

GD, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x684598

On a thread by kerry-is-my-prez:

Just watched Amer. Idol for the 1st time - Sanjaya is the George W. Bush of American Culture.

response #6 by Canuckistanian:

It's that powerful Sanjaya lobby
Some say that Sanjaya's family had it in for the Kennedys.

Um, you didn't hear this from me.

GD, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x683842

On a thread by superconnected:

      Chimps Genes More Evolved Than Humans
"Since the human-chimp split about 6 million years ago, chimpanzee genes can be said to have evolved more than human genes, a new study suggests..."

response #1 by jgraz:

      They clearly didn't test W

response #2 by slackmaster:

      I for one have never been able to open a can of beer with my feet
:shrug:

Other highly evolved responses in the thread...

LBN, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2810986

On a thread by sabra:

      Kucinich plans to file articles of impeachment against Cheney

response #51 by warren pease:

      Well, what a smarmy little prick
>"We'll see a Kucinich Administration before we'll see a Cheney impeachment," quipped one Democratic aide.

Hee hee hee. Oh it's just so quaint and silly to pretend like the will of the people actually matters. Oh, that Dennis. Always acting as if politics is about values, when all it's really about is maintaining the status quo and rewarding the rich.

He's off the record, of course. I wish that's because he's ashamed of himself, but it's more likely that he just got himself a great line to use to pick up really hot babes on the DC cocktail circuit.

And there are those who wonder why I'm so cynical about national politics. Of course, there are also those who think Orlando Florida is a Dominican baseball player.

response #65 by dchill:

      "Orlando Florida"
He's really Cuban, right?

response #69 by warren pease:

      Well, we don't want word to get out...
... since people are still pretty bigoted against ball players from that hell hole of communist perversity and oppression. I mean, free education and health care -- so unamerican. So he passes as a Dominican. I trust you'll keep this quiet.

GD, April 17, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x676609

On a thread by GreenPartyVoter:

"Analysis: Bush's Record Mixed on Disasters"

response #2 by hvn_nbr_2:

Mixed record: Directly caused some, simply ignored others, responded competently...
to none.

GD, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x689579

OP by karlrschneider:

      Our Okla legislators are right on the job. We now have a State Vegetable!
The watermelon.
:eyes:

response #5 by CrazyOrangeCat:

      Oh. I thought it was gonna be Inhofe.
:silly:

response #6 by karlrschneider:

      We're saving him for the Official State Nut.
:rofl:

Good crop of other funny responses in the thread...

GD, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x689766

OP by Vash the Stampede:

      Post what SHOULD be a state's motto:
I'll do my native state:

Massachusetts: Proud home of bomb-throwing commies for nearly 400 years!

And my current state:

Maryland: Well, Annapolis is nice, right? Right?

response #2 by Left Is Write:

      IDAHO: Enough with the potatoes! We got hops too! Hops!

response #7 by RoyGBiv:

      Oklahoma is not OK. n/t

response #76 by JoDog:

      Illinois:
"Will the defendant please rise?"

response #70 by underpants:

      Florida: if you think we can't count why don't you just go to one of the other 53 states
:grr:

response #22 by bullwinkle428:

      Iowa : Not as depressing as NEBRASKA!

response #50 by sarge43:

      Montana: Miles and miles of ...... huh, miles and miles. n/t

response #67 by unpossibles:

      Ohio: the t'ain't of it all
t'ain't the north, t'ain't the south, t'ain't the east, t'ain't the west.

Many other funny responses in the thread...

The Lounge, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6430913

On a thread by sabra:

      Thompson blames fatigue and cold for earning money is "part of the Jewish tradition" comment
"Former Wisconsin Gov. Tommy Thompson said today that fatigue and a persistent cold were to blame for his comment yesterday to a group of Reform Jews that earning money is 'part of the Jewish tradition.'

'I was tired, I made a mistake and I apologized,' Thompson told a group of Politico reporters and editors in an interview.

'Have you ever made a mistake?' a testy Thompson demanded of this reporter..."

response #11 by chimpsrsmarter:

      After i go to the bank i own i'm heading over to my media empire and writing a nasty editorial
about him.

response #11 by Behind the Aegis:

      LOL!
:rofl:

You do that, while I contact my puppets in Congress.... :evilgrin:

response #22 by chimpsrsmarter:

      please do and then text msg me at the aipac meeting--ok?

:D

response #23 by Behind the Aegis:

      Will do!
Agent 1545 of the ZOG signing off!

:P

GD, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x689155

On a thread by sabra:

Brian Williams: "You have all too much experience in dealing with grieving families going back to 911

response #4 by Javaman:

can we impeach now? williams just gave him
a televised BJ.

GD, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x692171

OP by LoZoccolo:

You don't get it people: John Edwards NEEDS that kind of haircut to win.
It costs a lot of money to make it look like a bowl cut.

GDP, April 18, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3222912

OP by DefenseLawyer:

      I am starting a Draft Jim Traficant movement
Yes, I know he is insane, and in prison, but that haircut couldn't have cost more than 8 bucks. That toupee shows fiscal responsibility. He's our man!

response #10 by progressoid:

      Does he have some sort of cranial swelling?
He has sort of a conehead look.

response #18 by Poiuyt:

      Beldar with hair

response #13 by AzDar:

      Have to object...PETA would be all over him for misusing that squirrel.
:rofl:

Click the link if you've never seen a picture of Traficant, or even if you have...

GD, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x698932

On a thread by stellanoir:

Couric just reported on CBS . . .
that 63 % of Americans do not believe Senor Gonzolaws is being truthful...

response #20 by dicknbush:

Abu Says... "I am a complete idiot and I am in charge and so...
I take full responsibility for not paying attention to anything that went on in relation to dismissing USA's for purely political reasons at the Department of Justice which I am in control of except when I am not in control which is most of the time but that is when my assistants are in charge and they tell me everything except what I don't want them to tell me which of course I don't know what it is they don't want me to know."

GD, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x705334

OP by LuckyTheDog:

Dick Cheney's haircuts
My sources say Dick Cheney actually spends more on haircuts than Edwards.

Most of it involves the cost of transporting the barber to the undisclosed location, killing the barber, wiping out his identity and disposing of the body.

The Lounge, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6433165

On a thread by rodeodance:

Gonzales rejects call for his ouster

response #1 by Fridays Child:

Today, the witness chair became the witless chair. eom

LBN, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2814148

On a thread by whistle:

Senator Orrin Hatch would be very much like John Ashcroft as Attorney General

response #1 by CrazyOrangeCat:

With any luck, he won't sing.

GD, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x707823

On a thread by The Count:

Partial Birth abortion ban bill - vote and signing ceremony (let the excuses begin
Thread has pic of Bush signing abortion bill, surrounded by nine senators & congressmen, including Santorum, DeLay, Hatch and Hastert.

response #10 by Bjornsdotter:

Ten great reasons for abortion n/t

GD, April 19, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x706667

OP by Rocknrule:

What happens when a Republican takes Viagra?
He gets taller

GD, April 20, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x713924

On a thread by sabra:

      Up to 130 (Iraqi) soldiers poisoned in northern Iraq
"The 130 Iraqi army soldiers reported poisoned on Friday felt sick after having a bad meal prepared by a foreign company, the commander of Hammam al-Aleel training center in Ninawa province said..."

response #4 by bemildred:

      Now there is a "chemical weapon" to reckon with. nt

response #5 by Sentinel Chicken:

      A bad case of Cheney's revenge.
:hurts:

LBN, April 20, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x2814884

OP by Gidney N Cloyd:

Dennis Miller...
Would it be way off base to say that the reason he can't keep a show on the air for long is because most liberals can't stand him and most conservatives can't UNDERstand him?

response #1 by corkhead:

I used to think he was funny, but 9/11 changed everything

GD, April 20, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x714312

OP by WilliamPitt:

      BREAKING: Alec Nicole Imus Kim Tom Britney Sanjaya-Sanjaya-Sanjaya Baldwin Gets Haircut In House
Film of haircut aftermath captured at Olive Garden, more at 11.

:banghead:

Must...have...hide-thread...feature...returned...pzzzzzzcheeeeezzzzz...

response #1 by IChing:

      LINK? PLEASE.........THAT IS JUST NOT RIGHT

response #15 by stellanoir:

      You forgot Sanjaya

response #1 by WilliamPitt:

      Remedied
:)

response #18 by stellanoir:

      Phew I'm so relieved.

response #20 by thoughtanarchist:

      I'll bet the electric bill from that episode was just shameful
:yoiks:

GD, April 20, 2007: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x714279