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Victory Science - The war in Afghanistan explained by the warologists.

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Are_grits_groceries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-02-09 12:36 AM
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Victory Science - The war in Afghanistan explained by the warologists.
Let us never forget just what's at stake in the war in Afghanistan: nothing less than the success of the war in Afghanistan. This war may be a mistake, a blood-soaked blunder, an unholy charnel house mindlessly consuming the bodies and souls of untold thousands, an open sore on the pockmarked face of history and an abomination before the sight of God and men, but it is first and foremost a war, and wars must be won. If the United States doesn't win this war, then will it not lose it? And if the United States loses this war, then won't the Unites States have lost it? And if the United States has lost this war, will that not then make the United States a kind of thing that loses wars? And then where would we be?

And just as America can't afford to abandon this war, surely it can't afford to abandon the Afghan people, who without the American military would be left to the savage whims of their hated enemy, the Afghan people. Indeed, it remains America's solemn duty as the leader of the free world to bring freedom and security to the Afghan people by hunting down and eliminating the Afghan people. Nor can America forget its own national security, and the dire threat posed by the Afghan people to our war against the Afghan people.

But we must also remember that the Afghans, menaced even though they are by the evil of the Afghans, are not blameless here. Have they sufficiently appreciated our efforts to kill them? No, they have not. Have they effectively and efficiently rebuilt their nation whenever we've had cause to blow it up? No, they have not. Have they become full and effective participants in the ongoing mission to kill them? No, they have not. It is long past time for the people of Afghanistan to step up their efforts to kill themselves, and not merely rely on American generosity to finish the job for them.

And so the President will be sending additional troops to Afghanistan - but a precise number of troops, carefully determined by the nation's top warologists after long months of carpet-bombing villages of laboratory mice - and they will kill Afghans there, but only for a precise period of time, calculated to be the exact interval necessary to protect our freedoms, or restore our security, or for all of us to grow bored and forget.

http://fafblog.blogspot.com/

Explains it as well as anything I've heard up until now.
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Ghost Dog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-02-09 04:45 AM
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1. ... and the dire threat to American national security posed by
American national insecurity. :freak:
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ima_sinnic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-02-09 05:02 AM
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2. that is absolutely brilliant
further down on the page, the same writer comments re Obama's winning the Nobel Peace Prize, "In other news, the Nobel Prize for Literature was awarded to a man who set fire to a library and then promised to write a book about it."
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moodforaday Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-02-09 07:29 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. And further still down the page
there's this:

Q: What will Iran do with nuclear weapons?
A: Terrible things. For a start, it will have them.
Q: Oh no!
A: And once it has them, it can threaten to use them, if anyone else tries to use them on them.
Q: There would be no defense against their self-defense.
A: They pose an existential threat to our ability to existentially threaten them.

This guy is awesome. I can see a long night coming.
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Are_grits_groceries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-02-09 07:35 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. The post about KSM and
Schrodinger's Guilt is my favorite. (11/14)
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