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Because, above all else, I am "Somebody's Mom"...

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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:23 AM
Original message
Because, above all else, I am "Somebody's Mom"...
I tend to apply events such as the VT shootings to my own life. My mind,and my heart, cannot wrap itself around what it would feel like to receive a phone call or a knock on the door-telling me my reason for living was gone.

When I read of soldiers dying I cannot imagine what it would be to kiss my husband goodbye in the morning, see him drive off... and then never have him come home. What would I do?

To be another mother, lifting a lifeless body off the ground, wiping dirt off a face that will never again smile back at her... all over a senseless, immoral and stupid war. How could that happen in the name of Democracy?

Yesterday a 5 year old little girl was killed in a freak accident, here in Ferndale,MI. She was playing with her kindergarten class and the gusting winds blew over a flagpole in her gated, fenced and secure playground. It fell on top of her. I sobbed as I read that in this morning's paper. I sobbed as I watched my 8 year old walk onto his own gated and secure playground this morning. Again thinking on the next time the phone rings and I see his school's name on the caller ID. What if that time they weren't calling to tell me he forgot his lunch? What if they were calling to tell me something worse?

Somebody's Mom went through that yesterday, the day before...and the day before that. Today Somebody's Mom is getting a phone call or a visit. Tomorrow the same will happen. And I will never be able to process it, but I will be able to think of it all.

...I cannot imagine... but I can find a place in my brain to try and come to terms with the deaths of so many soldiers, so many innocent Iraqis, 33 people on a college campus (yes, I include the gunman...he's somebody's baby), and 1 small girl. All on the same day.

I think it is wrong to compare one situation to another, but that is only my opinion.
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renie408 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
1. As a mother also
I think I have more room in my brain for the accidental deaths than I do for the senseless, preventable ones. And when it comes to Iraq, it isn't just the deaths...its the life. My husband and I say all the time that we cannot imagine trying to raise our family there...yet somebody is. Somebody there has two kids our kids' ages. Somebody there is trying to provide for them and keep them safe. It breaks my heart.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:40 AM
Response to Reply #1
4. I know what you mean. It's the conversation I have with "patriots"
all the time. What if it were your children in the way of those bombs? How can anyone send their children off to school in a situation such as that?
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acmavm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:28 AM
Response to Original message
2. And you're right. And it's not just this issue. It's pretty much
EVERYTHING.

Something bad happens, people respond with posts, and the 'you aren't caring about what I want you to care about' crowd come out of the woodwork.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:42 AM
Response to Reply #2
5. I got into this a few months ago.
When people were outraged over somebody actually caring about Anna Nicole. Glimmers and glimpses of humanity are what keep me from completely giving up on society.
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ewagner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:32 AM
Response to Original message
3. And ya' know what?
You're a damned good mom too.... :hi:
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:42 AM
Response to Reply #3
6. And I haven't seen you in AGES.
:hug: It's so very good to see you. How are you doing? Feeling good?
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ewagner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 03:34 PM
Response to Reply #6
23. Feeling good...
I was thinking about you the other day.....I don't hang out here as much as I used to ....also don't do The Lounge anymore...but I miss some of my old-timer friends a lot...


:pals:

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pnwmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 10:45 AM
Response to Original message
7. I know exactly what you mean. I've been there.
I remember rocking my first baby, and being overwhelmed with the thought that every mother in the world must have felt as I did -- and wondering how people ever let wars happen, since every person who died was "someone's baby."
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 11:39 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. It is why I have a hard time with these things.
it's what makes them more than just a 'diversion' to me. I can't help it.
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. I feel the same way, and all of my kids have fur and fangs
:pals:
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Behind the Aegis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:43 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. And they are just as important!
:hug:
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:45 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Thanks, BTA
:hug:
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
8. I'm not anyone's mom, but I can imagine and empathize
with the feelings.

I got nothing done yesterday. I just kept thinking about so many parents and friends, sitting by silent telephones, or frantically calling anyone they could think of to make sure their loved one was safe.

It's just too much. All that promise, just gone.

Julie
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. Kids really, for the most part. And the people dedicated to helping
them on the path.
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Beausoir Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 12:00 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. That's what kept going through my mind, too. The phone calls. The unanswered calls.
The incredible joy when someone finally checked-in.

The silence.

It's just too much.
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:27 PM
Response to Original message
12. K&R
:kick:
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FourScore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
16. One of the young men
who survived the shooting in the german class said he just kept thinking about his Mom and how she would never be able to overcome it if he died. I am certain he was right about that. Thank God he survived. I am so saddened by yesterday's events.

I understand your post so well, MrsGrumpy. I never knew I was capable of such emotional depth until I had my children. When they perform on stage, I am infinitely more nervous than if I were up there performing. When their feelings are hurt, it's infinitely more sad than if mine were hurt. No matter what the feeling, it is so much stronger when it's about my kids. If a tragedy were to befall them...I can't even think about it.

K&R
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:47 PM
Response to Original message
17. Great post, Mrs. G.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Vert well-put.

:hi: :hug: :loveya:
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earth mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:49 PM
Response to Original message
18. As a mom I hear you, but given how the Iraq War deaths
are rarely front page news, the sensationalism that is given the shootings is what I object to. Both situations are tragic, the difference is the media will milk one for all it's worth, while ignoring the other because it's not profitable for them to do otherwise. :puke:
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Karenina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 01:56 PM
Response to Original message
19. I am not able, in this horrific tragedy, to shunt aside
the pain of the shooter's mom and her community. THIS SUCKS. :cry::cry::cry:
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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 02:03 PM
Response to Original message
20. I'm so sorry about the little girl in your town
No wonder you were sobbing. How must her parents be feeling--such a tiny little thing, so vulnerable but doing nothing that would have given anybody a second thought about her safety. Devastating.
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FloridaJudy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
21. Some quoted Ann Lamott yesterday
To the effect that having a child was like taking your heart out and watching it walk around free. I can't imagine what the parents of VT students went through yesterday. They are in my prayers, just as those in Baghdad, and Darfur, and those with children serving overseas.
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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 02:28 PM
Response to Original message
22. One of my daughter's dearest friends was killed last year
Edited on Tue Apr-17-07 02:28 PM by Horse with no Name
and I still wonder how her mother is able to get up every single day and take that first step each morning.
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Irishonly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-17-07 04:35 PM
Response to Original message
24. K&R
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