BREAKING: Fed to Bail Moon Out After It Craters Tomorrow...Obama Determines: "Moon Too Big To Fail".

[ddeclue]

WASHINGTON D.C. 6:54PM 10/7/2009 - There had been subtle warning signs of late of the impending danger as the moon began waning to earthbound viewers around the world but until just a day or so ago only a few Federal researchers with NASA's LCROSS project were actually aware that the Moon was going to crater spectacularly tomorrow.

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke in coordination with Treasury Secretary Timothy Geightner is now working feverishly late into the night to bail the Moon out as soon as possible after it craters tomorrow afternoon after receiving a late night phone call from President Barack Obama.

President Obama became deeply concerned after receiving reports from NASA researchers that the moon was going to crater and yesterday evening actually set up multiple telescopes on the White House lawn and brought in numerous student observers from his daughters' school to help them study the impending event in greater detail at first hand.

The President is quoted as saying in a late night phone call after the event on the White House lawn that "The Moon is simply too big to fail. I don't want to be in the business of orbital mechanics but we simply can't allow the Moon to falter like this- too many Americans depend upon it, in fact too many around the world depend upon the Moon for their livelihood."

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs when asked in this morning's press gaggle what the proposed bailout would cost said "the Administration is considering multiple options for the bailout but we do not have details at this time."

Federal Reserve Bernanke when pressed for comment is quoted as saying "I'm sorry but I cannot discuss which lunar craters will specifically be bailed out or how much will be going to each crater. If we were to discuss these details it could well undermine confidence in these lunar craters amongst the lunar observing public and discourage individual craters from seeking the Fed's help".

[CreekDog]

1. whomever unrecommended this

get a life. really. :eyes:

[tabasco]

5. whoever recommended this

get a life, really. :eyes:

[Bucky]

9. whosoever shall hath unrecommended unto this ...

  getteth thou a life, verily.  :eyes:       <== (I'm rolling eyes at myself here. Really, I'm just too much sometimes)

[BeatleBoot]

12. who do?

The Hoodoo Gurus?



You don't say?

[SIMPLYB1980]

20. The baby with the power.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HqmocK-L1ik

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

31. Scoobie Doo?

[CreekDog]

22. I'm sorry, I was wrong

you get a life. really. :rofl:

[nc4bo]

2. .

:spray:

[jeffbr]

3. Cow will jump over it tomorrow

No problem

[GMA]

4. I'll be laughing

for days. Come ON you guys--this is funny stuff.

[KatyMan]

6. Awesome

If DU had a post of the week thing, this would absolutely be it. Follow closely by the "I'd.Hit.It" post.

[SIMPLYB1980]

7. LOL!

:toast:

[monmouth]

8. You are most talented and very, very funny. Great post...n/t

[Bucky]

10. In a related story... "Boenner denounces moon rescue, calls tidal forces 'socialistic' "

New York - Staff at the Weekly Standard cheered as today as the moon slowly spun out of earth's orbit...

[ddeclue]

24. tell me more that sounds funny ...

[AsahinaKimi]

11. Will Republicans Cheer if NASA misses the moon?

"JUST A BIT OUT SIDE!"

[BlooInBloo]

13. Is that your original work?

[ddeclue]

14. yes.. I'm surprised at all the unrecs it is getting.. don't people know it's a joke?

[BlooInBloo]

15. Kudos then - very well-played....

As for the unrecs, there could be a lot of reasons. One benign reason, for example, could be that some are simply sick of hearing about the moon.

As usual, don't mind the temporary transient rec-state. Insofar as it matters at all (it doesn't much), it's the long term steady state that is "important".

[ddeclue]

25. Damn! I forgot to describe the moon as "shovel ready"!!!

:argh:

[BlooInBloo]

26. hahahah! Just saw that.

[Bucky]

17. It's excellently done. "Unrec" is Mods' gift to the sourpusses of DU.

I rec it highly. You can safely ignore the people who go through life not getting sarcasm.

[Warren DeMontague]

16. I heard Roman Polanski is going to eat a big, juicy steak at the Olive Garden. On the moon. nt

[Bucky]

18. Sorry, no. You misunderstood.

The moon rocket is about looking for some water, not "some daughter".

[Warren DeMontague]

23. Pa-Chow!

[underseasurveyor]

19. Oh My Freakin God

:rofl:

The Headline on its own is HA-larious but then reading on:spray:

Man you got it pegged:fistbump:

[HysteryDiagnosis]

21. Can't they paint a face on the moon with food coloring instead of

picking on it with bombs and stuff?? I would stare at it, you?

[bvar22]

27. Happiest K&R of the day.

You got skills!

[NeedleCast]

28. Well Done

[ddeclue]

29. :D

:D

[ddeclue]

30. .