Sanford sought permission to visit lover...from his WIFE? WTF?

[Blue_Roses]

This is definitely a :wtf: moment...


What planet is this woman on?:crazy: There are so many things that come to mind, I can't even begin to put them all down in this post. But two that on are the top of my list are: 1) If you have to give permission as to whether your husband can see his mistress or not, then you probably haven't realized that you are his wife, not his mother. 2) Mrs. Sanford, have some self-respect and kick the idiot to the curb. Why in the hell would you want this man if he's obviously shown a love for someone else? Remember the saying: If you love something set it free...if it comes back, it's yours or just republican deadbeat.:crazy:

She's already said he wasn't the person she thought he was, so move on. What is the deal? He obviously isn't interested in making the marriage work and even if he does put on the pretense of trying, it's obvious he's in love with someone else. The cat is out of the bag so pretending you're a happy family values couple isn't working anymore.:shrug:

This reminds me of the book I just read about plantation owers who fell in love with their slaves. The woman at the "big house" usually knew what was going on but tried so hard to live in denial.

____________________________________________





SULLIVAN’S ISLAND —South Carolina first lady Jenny Sanford said Friday her husband repeatedly asked permission to visit his lover in the months after she discovered his affair.

“I said absolutely not. It’s one thing to forgive adultery; it’s another thing to condone it.”

Jenny Sanford spoke to The Associated Press during a 20-minute interview in the living room at the coastal home where she sought refuge with their four sons. They were her first extended comments on the affair.


She said when her husband, Gov. Mark Sanford, inexplicably disappeared last week, she hoped he was hiking the Appalachian Trail, as his staff told those inquiring about his absence. That he had dared to go to Argentina to see the other woman stunned her.

“He was told in no uncertain terms not to see her,” she said in a strong, steady voice.

“I was hoping he was on the Appalachian Trail. But I was not worried about his safety. I was hoping he was doing some real soul searching somewhere and was devastated to find out it was Argentina. It’s tragic.”

The Sanfords separated about two weeks ago. She said her husband told the family he wanted some time away to work on writing a book and clear his head.

“I had every hope he was not going to see her,” the first lady said.

“You would think that a father who didn’t have contact with his children, if he wanted those children, he would toe the line a little bit.”



http://www.thestate.com/803/story/843243.html

[lame54]

1. she should have said yes...

then hired a camera crew to follow him

divorce-custody-game-set -match

[rosesaylavee]

2. 'Mommy' said no repeatedly.

Yeah, this is/was not a healthy relationship. Those poor kids. I see lots of therapy in their future.

[depakid]

6. Raised in a fundy household is bad enough

[ChairmanAgnostic]

10. people forget just how corrosive

such faith based idiocy is to the innocents.

[Blue_Roses]

13. it's suffocating and unrealistic...

nt

[kestrel91316]

3. “He was told in no uncertain terms not to see her." This is polite SC political

wife-speak for "You better break it off and stay the hell away from that slut if you don't want to wind up singing soprano, buddy."

[BlooInBloo]

4. What a shitty, shitty human being.

[Are_grits_groceries]

5. She was setting up the

"We will save the marriage" card. He has been the great moralizer so she was going to hoist him on his own petard (or on his own something). He is so screwn.

[rvablue]

17. I agree with you. She is playing him right now and she knows exactly what she is doing.

She is fully aware that he is still totally in love with this woman and has not broken things off.

Right now, I'm guessing that Mrs. Sanford is now angling to be the next Governor Sanford from South Carolina.

As was reported in the NYT today, it is well-known (as I'm sure you know better than I since you reside there) that she is the brains behind this operation.

I think she wants to sink him once and for all, all the while playing the wife who's will to give him one more chance, throwing out juicy tidbits like this to the press, and waiting until he can be caught once again contacting or visiting this woman.....and then *POW*

[Blue_Roses]

20. ...

:thumbsup:

[Sheltiemama]

42. I think she played it very well.

One of the AP photos showed her reaching for the top book in a stack of religious books she's been reading to help her through this. It was about the book of Job. Very nice touch.

[pnwmom]

7. Sounds like you're blaming the victim here. And it sounds perfectly reasonable

to me that she attempted to lay down the law about his seeing the woman. "If you want a chance at this marriage, then we're going to therapy and you're not going to have anything more to do with her."

I also disagree that in every adulterous situation (even if "love" is supposedly involved) the only acceptable response is to end the marriage. Sanford could very well feel torn, with love for both women. There is no way for us as outsiders to know if he and Jenny have a marriage worth saving.

[Blue_Roses]

11. oh, for fuck's sake...

no one is blaming the victim. I'm saying have some self-respect and look at this from the reality of how this is going down now and will continue to go for quite some time. The man is either really, REALLY in love with this other woman or he is going through common mid-life crisis. WHATEVER, the reason, for Mrs. Sandford to assume that ultimatums will work in this situation leads me to believe she is very naive.

If he does come back and wants to work on the marriage--and I mean REALLY, REALLY wants to work cause it's gonna be very tough--then more power to them. But to stay in something for "saving graces" sake is ridiculous. It leads to MORE bitterness and is counter-productive.

[pnwmom]

16. She has great dignity and self-respect from what I've seen.

She also has four sons to worry about.

[Blue_Roses]

18. so staying in a marriage for the kids is healthy?

more like hurt and embarrassment. No doubt she's handled this well considering...

but to go on record as making these kind of demanding comments doesn't do much for her in the humility department.

It's hard to feel continued compassion for her when she makes these kinds of comments

[pnwmom]

34. Yes, attempting to work through problems in a marriage can be very healthy.

And children can benefit from parents who work through their problems, rather than run from them.

What you see as "demanding comments" sound reasonable to me. He obviously is conflicted. If he decides he does not want a divorce, then he needs to listen to her.

[malaise]

19. Sorry when your wife tells you don't see di mistress

and you organize a trip which was so badly planned that EPIC FAIL does not describe it, you have already chosen di mistress over the wife. After all Argentina is not in the next county. That he didn't believe he could or would get caught means he was beyond obsessed with seeing his mistress. That marriage is over.
Sadly the wife believes she can prevent those boys from seeing their father - that's bullshit. He's still their father regardless of his utter disrespect for the wife and the marriage.

sp.

[Blue_Roses]

22. very true...

I made a trip like that for someone back in the "day" and I was so smitten I couldn't get there fast enough! Thank-goodness it was only a 200 mile drive to south Louisiana;)

[malaise]

27. LOL

Hope it was worth it. :D

[JerseygirlCT]

41. Absolutely - that's what I was thinking

how in the world is this HER fault?

If he's asking his wife if he can see his mistress, then I'd say HE'S the one with the problem, and some pretty big confusion about what a wife is.

And yes, no one outside that relationship can discern whether the marriage is worth working on.

[11 Bravo]

8. My wife would say, "Sure, but you're leaving this with me". Then she would cut my dick off.

[Skittles]

21. that's a gal with self-respect, Bravo

says a lot about you that she's the kind of gal you love :D

[Cha]

23. I'm glad your wife

loves you so much.

[asjr]

9. Actually, it is beginning to sound as

if they really deserve each other.

[ribrepin]

12. When your philandering husband asks permission to visit his mistress

the marriage is over and probably has been for years.

The icing on the cake was when the gov apolized to his mistress, the press and the people of South Carolina before remembering the wife and kids. She probably doesn't really care that he forgot her at this point, but the kids? It's Katie bar the door time.

[Blue_Roses]

15. that was so clear

when he put the mistress before the wife and kids...

[ribrepin]

25. I'm suspect the gov was shocked when Jenny and the kids didn't show up for the press conference

I'm sure the gov has put Jenny and the kids on the back burner for years. It was all about the governor's needs. He's finding out quick that Jenny has a few needs of her own...like revenge and a pound of flesh.

Could you image this guy in the White House? Where in the world is our president when the world blows up? He's off finding himself in Argentina. He was a serious contender for the GOP presidency in 2012. Says a lot about the GOP.

[Canuckistanian]

33. I think her statement, "I don't know where he is and I'm not concerned" tells us everything

My wife is calling me on the cell if I'm four HOURS late. And she's CONCERNED.

The same thing with me if my wife went missing for that long.

There's a marriage that is beyond repair right there.

[Kber]

38. Same here.

If my husband disappeared, on father's day no less, I'd be filing a missing person report.

Because I honestly believe in my heart of hearts that he'd die before he let his kids down.

It's just one of the very many things I kinda like about him. :)

[kevinbgoode]

14. I suspect the Governor and Maria were double-dating with Sen. Ensign

and his mistress. . .and all the while plotting their next "family values" legislation.

Thank goodness they gays have been prevented from spoiling "traditional" marriage for Republicans. Ensign and Sanford have shown the public just what "traditional" marriage means to conservatives.

Now adultery is supposed to be against the law in South Carolina. And it most surely is grounds for dissolution. Seems to me their "church" should be removing recognition of the sham "marriage" between Mark and Jenny - after all, the Church MUST protect the sanctity of heterosupremacist relationships.

I keep waiting for the cabal of wingnut legal organizations to be furiously filing legal briefs right and left demanding that the state arbitrarily dissolve the Sanford's marriage. . .you know, just like they tried to do in the Schiavo case, using adultery as one of their many reasons for advocating that a state had a right to dissolve a marriage against the wishes of the parties involved. What? Not a peep from the holier-than-thou protectors of "values?" What a surprise...they obviously believe in special rights when its one of their own.

[Blue_Roses]

24. lol

I suspect the Governor and Maria were double-dating with Sen. Ensign and his mistress...

:rofl:

[billyoc]

26. They both deserve every badness life can visit on them.

[checks-n-balances]

28. That's a little harsh, considering there are 4 children involved

Why not save your vitriol for their political party? :)

[billyoc]

36. They're leading lights in their political party, and I wish them nothing but sadness and pain.

[pnwmom]

35. What was her unforgivable sin, in your opinion?

[billyoc]

37. She's a Republican fundraiser.

[dixiegrrrrl]

29. HE asked the wife for "permission" ???????

Either he has no balls/spine or ( more realistically) he was trying to set wifey up to condone the affair.

Maybe some guy can explain this to me:

Man is in a "committed" relationship, man gets caught cheating, man chases after the woman he cheated on begging for another chance
instead of just turning the "other woman" with a sigh of relief.

Why is that?
Never mind the governorship thing...why is that most guys chase after the scorned woman???

[TheCowsCameHome]

30. She has him by the nuts, and he's already singing 'Ave Maria' in soprano.

Mark, you're all done.

[Tim01]

31. delete

moved

[Tim01]

32. Everybody knows it is better to cheat on them and not tell them.

Working things out is for pansies. Because all guys are the same and all women are the same.

It's cheaper to keep her.
:sarcasm:

[CTyankee]

39. smart women find out. Most do, actually...

Men leave little hints around, ya know...

[Liberal_in_LA]

40. kick