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Attractive, slightly greying Attorney Carseat Drool asked his (fake)titian haired daughter Nanny, who loved nothing more than a good Tuesday morning mystery, to join him in library.
"Whats up Dad?" ask Nanny, heading for the breakfast smorgasbord that had been laid out on the sideboard by the slightly senile yet lovable housekeeper, Hannah Gruel.
"Well, Nanny, it seems that our Governor has disappeared. No one, not even his wife knows where he is. She seems to think he went off to "write and reflect" but she didn't know exactly where. It's a heck of a mess - he's supposed to address the Sons of the Confederacy of Dunces tomorrow. They are his biggest fundraisers, they are even whispering that he could be presidential material, since he has passed a sanity test. You know what a roadblock that's been".
"How about his staff?" asked Nanny. "They would have to know where he is, being Governor and all, right?" She scowled at the herrings in cream on her plate, clearly long past their due date. Had Hannah Gruel been hitting the food bank and fudging the grocery budget again?
"No, Nanny. They came up with a strange tale about him hiking the Appalachian Trail, but that's clearly a cover. No Republican Governor would go near the Appalachian Trail on Nude Hiking Day. Some of the Senators, perhaps, but not a Governor." The older yet still virile attorney buttered his burnt toast and had a heaping spoonful of the spoiled herring.
"What else, Dad?" Nanny looked out the window where her sleek red roadster was illegally parked and smiled. Her dad had the goods on every traffic cop in town.
"Well, the only other clues, as you say, are a black SUV that was parked at the Columbia Airport. Inside were a baseball cap, running shoes, sunscreen a pair of shorts, a canvas bag and a sleeping bag." Carseat Drool looked frantically for his handkerchief, he had an awful feeling that he might suddenly retch. The wave of nausea passed and he continued,"Inside the bag were some receipts - some salsa, samba, and tango lessons. Also a used up tube of Grecian Formula, some quick bronzer and some teeth whitening strips. Any idea, Nanny?"
Nanny turned away from the window. "Yes, Dad. I do have an idea. Buenos Aires! Orbitz just had some great deals and we all know the Governor likes "exotic" places, right? The tent in the back seat was just a prop for when he told his wife that he was going off to 'write and reflect'. I imagine she'll give him plenty to reflect about when he gets back."
"Nanny, you're amazing. Well, as I suspect you've gathered, I've got a call to make. It won't be easy breaking this to the Governor's wife. Oh, well, someone's got to do it." A muscle twitched in Carseat Drool's manly jaw as he picked up the phone.
Nanny walked over and gave her mature yet still continent father a quick peck on his cheek. "Dad, isn't there ANOTHER call you should make? And sooner rather than later?"
Attorney Carseat Drool put down the phone and smoothed back the attractive grey wings of hair that framed his almost unwrinkled visage. He massaged the area where once brow lines existed, lost in thought. Then he looked up and smiled. "I know Nanny! Yes, I need to call the doctor that administered the sanity test! Darn, that's just one more loss the Republican bench can ill afford."
Nanny gazed adoringly yet still appropriately at her attorney father. "I can think of someone who might fill that gap, and he happens to be right in this very room!" She turned on her heel, gave her (fake)titian hair a toss, and sailed out the door towards the gleaming red roadster where yet another batch of silly tickets were bunched under the wipers.
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