A third-grader's biography of Dick Cheney

[kpete]

A third-grader's biography of Dick Cheney


Dick Cheney was the 43rd president of the United States. The second George Bush needed a ruining mate, and Dick Cheney chose himself. When terrorists hijacked planes on 9/11, Dick Cheney tried to shoot one down. Then he invaded Iraq because it was a bad country with lots of oil. He liked to hurt people and fish. One time he shot his friend in the face, and the friend said he was sorry for getting in the way.

Dick Cheney had four heart attacks and went to the inauguration of Barack Obama in a wheelchair. He was a great president because he kept America safe except for 9/11, and the soldiers killed in Iraq, and the friend he shot in the face.



The end.
http://michaelwolffe.blogspot.com/2009/05/third-graders-biography-of-dick-cheney.html

[RufusEarl]

1. Yup, that's about it........

Peace!

[NYC_SKP]

2. Perfect! LOL "Dick Cheney chose himself."

:rofl:

Recommended.

[Towlie]

3. Cheney was a capable "ruining mate", but did Bush really need his help to ruin the country?

[Frustratedlady]

4. Give that kid an A+

for reading between the lines and figuring out Cheney's real position. Appointed himself is right on.

[madmax]

5. I believe that Cheney went to President Obama's

Inauguration in a wheelchair because he didn't want to stand while a bi-racial President was being sworn. Ok, so I'm off the wall but, that's my opinion.

[donco6]

7. I think he wanted to look even more like Mr. Potter -

from "It's a Wonderful Life."

But the standing thing could be true, too.

[Politicalboi]

10. Yup I get that feeling too

I bet it's an inside joke to Cheney's Klan.

[tomp]

17. my suspicion also. nt

[laststeamtrain]

6. K & R. "Wherever children are, there is the golden age." --Novalis. n/t.

[troubledamerican]

8. Missing chapters.

Cheney changed the Continuity of Government order of succession prior to 9/11, in collaboration with Donald Rumsfeld.

Cheney created a Shadow Government comprised of entirely Republicans who would take over in the event that Congress was killed in one single act, such as a plane hitting the Capitol Dome during session.

Cheney and Rumsfeld changed the "Engagement Protocol" for NORAD scrambling F-16s so that a scramble was no longer "automatic" when a flight went off-course in U.S. airspace. The rule was changed to require Rumsfeld to personally be located so he could personally OK it. So that 8-minute intercepts by F-16s such as 1999's famous incident involving pro-golfer Payne Stewart's plane would never be repeated.

[Aviation Pro]

9. Spot the fuck on.....

...out of the mouths of babes.

[Usrename]

11. lol

the kid has a bright future as a historian

[truedelphi]

12. I guess this kid is a glass half full kinda kid.

LOL. That essay leaves me speechless. (Almost)

[Canuckistanian]

13. Wow, I don't think I could summarize Cheney with that few words.

Impressive!

:thumbsup:

[FSogol]

14. B+ Try to work his 4 Vietnam deferments into your article. n/t

[sam kane]

15. great reading, kpete.

thanks.

[Patchuli]

16. Out of the mouths of babes comes the Truth!

Nice summary,young'un!

[FlyingSquirrel]

18. Dick Cheney also liked his privacy...

so he removed himself from Google Earth, marked everything that he wrote or looked at as "Top Secret", and had a man-sized safe in his office. I'd tell you what he kept in the safe, but then he would have to kill me.

:D