THIS is why I like you. Please lend me your patience:

[ZeitGuy]

(On Edit: title, typos, and to note that, with the next long missive, I'll include another recipe)


It’s great when it’s other folks with the problem and not you, isn't it?

Here are some things you don't do:

You don't accidental drive up onto crowded sidewalks and kill shoppers at a farmers market. You don't keep seventy-five cats as pets, and you don't enjoy a high-fiber diet rich in your own toenails. Sure, you tried licking the business end of a 9-volt battery once, and then you did it again just because the first jolt didn't hurt all that much. You may might have put your baby sister up on top of the refrigerator and left her there for two hours while you went out and rode your bike with friends, and yep, you ate a little construction paper paste when you were six. But you've never once discharged both barrels of a 12-gage shotgun inside of your house at Thanksgiving and blown apart Grandma's 100-year-old-formerly-mint-condition Stickley chair, along with part of the left thigh of Grandma, who was sitting in it at the time.

Take a minute to enjoy your internal gloat. And enjoy the fact that I am totally not writing about you. Not a single one of you. I’m writing about them, people. So don’t reply indignantly to this OP and get all attitude-y and pout “Not ME! That's not how I am!” We already know this. Ain't it super? Indeed it is. Let’s take 10 seconds to pat ourselves on the back and feel really good about ourselves.

Okay, now let's move on to my point.

[Swamp Rat]

1. Welcome to DU!

:hi:

[ZeitGuy]

2. Thanks so much--I am a long-time admirer....

...of your work. You also post at C&L, don't you?

[Swamp Rat]

5. Nope, but I am a long-time CL lurker.

:)

[ZeitGuy]

8. I thought I recognized your name...

...it pops up in the Comments from time to time, n'est pas?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. My dear ZeitGuy...

Wow.

This is great.

I'm hoping you write for a living, yes, I do. For this is brilliant. You have a gift. And I thank you for sharing said gift with all of us here...

K&R

:patriot:

[MadHound]

4. Well, from a stylistic point of view

You really need to shorten your rants, tighten up the prose, and get to your point quicker. Granted, you telegraphed it way ahead of time, but still, you could have made your point in a much shorter piece.

As far as substance goes, I seriously doubt that very few, if anybody, gets deathbed regrets over whom they voted for five decades earlier. Most racists that I've known have little or no regrets about their racism. It would be nice to think that they did, but generally they don't.

[ZeitGuy]

7. Point taken. My wife has always told me...

...that I take 1,000 words to say what could be said in 100. So did my creative writing instructors back in college. Old habits, it would seem, die harder than Bruce Willis.

I guess that, regarding the notion of deathbed contrition, I'd like to think of myself as a cynical optimist. Meaning, I wish that it were the case...but if it ain't, I'm still up for partying.

[MadHound]

9. Not trying to be harsh

You've got a fine style and flow, just make it punchier.

As far as optimism, I'm personally optimistic, but when it comes to other people, politics, the public, I'm a horrible cynic.

I didn't see it before, but welcome to DU!

Oh, are you ready to have your Jayhawk ass handed to you again this year? M I Z Z O U!

;) :hi:

[ZeitGuy]

11. If Mizzou get us in football, it'll only make...

...the crushing and humiliating retribution dispensed during basketball season all the sweeter.

[MadHound]

12. Oh dude, I know, I know

MU's B Ball has gone downhill. Quinn Snyder ruined it, and it's going to take a few more years to get it back. But I think Anderson is on the right track, and you never know, we could sneak out a win here at home.

[ZeitGuy]

13. You guys should haul old Norm outtah retirement. (nt)

[bigtree]

6. and, another DU star is born

You hit it directly on the head, ZeitGuy. And, I had fun following your point down. I very much appreciate your sentiments and I thank you for expressing them here.

[ZeitGuy]

10. Your patience AND indulgence is appreciated.

...glad it was worth your time.:toast: