Buying my 5-year-old her first gun

[crispini]

I would like to start out saying right up front before things get confused that this is an OPINION COLUMN WHICH I DID NOT WRITE. Thank you.

Trey Garrison: Buying my 5-year-old her first gun

04:22 PM CDT on Wednesday, October 1, 2008

My little girl is growing up. That very special change is coming in her life. She is about to blossom into a new stage of maturity. As a father, I have to face facts.

She's 5 now; it's time to buy her first gun.

I actually picked out her first rifle back when she was just 3. It's a Remington .22-caliber rifle, just like I had when I was her age.

Except hers is pink. And it has a Hello Kitty emblem inked on its pink butt. (Just like her mom.)

rest of the column is here....
http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/opinion/viewpoints/stories/DN-garrison_02edi.State.Edition1.5201c9f.html

:popcorn:

[ogneopasno]

1. After that gotcha lede,

I thought he sounded reasonable.

[wtmusic]

2. String of Claymore mines?

Tell me this is a joke.

[The Straight Story]

3. I agree with him:

" If she grew up ignorant about guns or worse, in awe of them like they were some forbidden fruit, the world would be a much more dangerous place for her. I think it's better she not only understand that they are just tools, but that she's trained to disarm a curious kid playing with a found one. And then even fieldstrip it on the spot, rendering it safe until an adult can be found.

In no other area of life does ignorance bestow safety. Why should this be any different? "

[MrCoffee]

7. Dude, that's exactly the section I cut and pasted.

Well played.

[MidwestTransplant]

11. I wonder if the parent feels that way about birth control and STDs and

Also I am ALL for the right to bear arms but putting a hello kitty on a gun makes it seem like a toy which it is not and should be what the parent is trying to teach.

[crispini]

13. Another very good point. Is he teaching his five year old about condoms?

After all, sex is prevalent everywhere, and ignorance there certainly won't protect you. ;)

[ogneopasno]

15. If this guy is truly describing how he teaches his kid about guns,

I think she'll understand it's not a toy.

[awoke_in_2003]

69. My father took me out

with a .22 and several watermelons. Exploding clouds of red really get the point across. I was given several thorough safety lessons before I could even touch it, then I could only handle it when he was around.

[MrCoffee]

17. It's satire, MOTO

Satire - 1. the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc.
2. a literary composition, in verse or prose, in which human folly and vice are held up to scorn, derision, or ridicule.
3. a literary genre comprising such compositions.

[wtmusic]

21. Read the comments

A lot of people in Dallas with mines in the front yard, apparently.

[MrCoffee]

24. Yeah, as if anonymous internet commentary is known for its rationality

90% of the comments in here are so far off the deep end that it makes me wish I owned stock in whoever makes halidol.

[deaniac21]

90. No Kidding?

Like Remington is going to produce pink rifles for little girls. That would be one huge market wouldn't it. It's my understanding that Remington is in the business to actually make money. The catalog is below. Please search for pink .22s. The only youth model .22 is the Model 5 Youth.

http://www.remington.com/products/firearms/rimfire_rifles/model_five.asp

[Fleshdancer]

22. I agree about the Hello Kitty thing. That cat is doesn't belong on a lot of things:

[tburnsten]

54. Gets people who might not want to shoot

for aesthetic reasons interested. No harm no foul. She will understand it is not a toy, lots of things can look pretty and not be made for happy fun fun time unsupervised after school. Even if she did regard it as toyish it wouldn't matter, how would she get into her parents' safe to retrieve it?

[derby378]

110. If my wife ever wanted an AK...

...she just might want one with Hello Kitty on the stock. We already have matching Kalashnikitty T-shirts as it is.

[madmom]

25. I agree whole-heartedly about the hello kitty pink guns I have seen them and they do

look like a toy gun very bad idea IMO that being said I agree with teaching kids the fundamentals of gun safety etc, I was taught, my kids were taught they know how to use them if need be and other than the boys liking to shoot targets every now and then, have no interest in them!

[tburnsten]

55. What something looks like in a photo

and what it looks/feels like in real life are totally different, there is no mistaking a heavy rifle for what it is, even if it does have an odd pink finish applied to it.

[madmom]

78. I have seen them, not a photo, they look like toys, a kid isn't gonna know something isn't a

toy because of the weight!It isn't an odd pink it's a bright barbie pink!

[NeedleCast]

46. I think that's a good point

I'm from Texas and being around guns as a child wasn't uncommon, especially on my grandparents ranch. I had shot small calibur (.22) rifles by age five. That being said, it was ALWAYS under very close adult supervision and I was never left around unattended guns which had ammunition in or near them. In fact, at the ranch, ammunition was locked in a safe in a high cabinet at all times when children were present.

That being said, all of my many cousins were taught from the begining that guns were dangerous and could be deadly and we all respected that. Making a gun seem like a toy by coloring it pink and putting Hello Kitty stickers on it seems like a bad idea.

[The Straight Story]

74. He may well be, but you make his point as well - teaching vs ignorance is good

:toast:

[Lyric]

23. Our gas range is a tool. The lawnmower is a tool.

I didn't let my five-year-old get anywhere near either of them.

There are some tools that are not appropriate for children to be using, even to "learn" about. You can teach a child gun safety without buying her a gun. My Dad managed it just fine. We didn't get firearms until we were at least twelve, but we knew how to clear them and we knew The Rules.

It's his choice, but I think it's irresponsible. YMMV.

[NeedleCast]

48. With respect, your argument here is just one of sementics

The line you've drawn is just a difference in what age you seem to think gun use/owenership is appropriate.

[tburnsten]

58. Just because it is "hers" doesn't mean

she will have control over it outside of supervised range time. For instance I will be buying my daughter a gun years before she will have access to it, probably years before she will even come to a range with me. Parenting isn't all about the kids you know ;-)

[reggie the dog]

100. Dad bought me my .38 the day I was born

he always kept it locked up with his guns and I was 8 or 9 before I fired it. Once I get a ranch out in the countryside I will be buying a birding shotgun and a hunting rifle, my daughter will learn to shoot before she is 18.

[pacalo]

28. Only in the home of a gun zealot would a gun be considered "forbidden fruit" for a 5-yr.-old girl.

I'm thinking of the "shoot 'em up cowboy" tv culture during which I was a child. Cap guns & holsters were among the popular toys, & I cringe just thinking about that fad making a revival because in today's world, real guns are the passion for the adults. And, referring to some of the freepers' comments about getting ready for the "revolution" after election that were posted on DU, I don't even want to think about what crude remarks are overheard by children in a gun zealot's home.

[TalkingDog]

45. We were taught to respect my grandfather's gun.

Of course it didn't involve us getting our own. Just a sharp swat on the ass.

In my teens, my mother let me shoot her handgun a few times. And when she died, I took her handgun and her Ted Williams 12 gauge, along with my .22 to a friends shooting range and had him show me everything I might need to know about shooting them and staying safe while doing so.

We've got coyotes and our instances of rabies in NC is severely underreported due to the county govt.s cooking the books so their numbers stay low.

So, while a handgun might only be useful for close range killing, a .22 is more than a basic necessity for people who live in areas with rabies or predators that attack your pets or livestock.

5 might be a bit young, but it's much like sex. It can be much more dangerous if you don't explain ANYTHING, than if you give them accurate, factual information.

[redqueen]

47. ...

:thumbsup:

[SidneyCarton]

73. Agreed, this man sounds surprisingly sane.

A little kooky, sure but nonetheless sane, at least in an insane world.

[jobycom]

92. Every gun death I encountered growing up was from someone raised to be responsible.

I grew up with guns, learned to shoot when I was about five, too, as did most of my friends. Always had several BB and pellet guns, including air pump .22 caliber pellet rifles that could easily kill a large animal, or human. I never killed anyone.

But I knew a lot of people killed by guns. A couple were outright murders, some were suicides, but a lot were accidents. Almost every one of the shooters had been raised to be cautious with guns, to consider them tools, and all the cliches the articles used. In the end, if just for a moment, they couldn't resist treating the gun as a toy, or a talisman, or a superhero's cape, or a magic wand to win an argument that their spouse was just too stubborn to give up. Or whatever. Bang. One more accidental death, one more set of grieving parents (or in a couple of cases, children). Usually the shooter's life was just as screwed up as the victim's family. A couple of the shooters committed suicide, either on the spot, or within a couple of years.

I made sure my kids know how to shoot guns--rifles, anyway. I've made sure they are afraid of the goddamned things. And I make sure they can't get one at my house. I know from my own childhood that they could still die from their friends having guns. But at least if that happens, I'll have the very slight comfort that it wasn't a gun I got them. It wasn't my fault.

Anyway planning to get their kids a gun should watch a parent who has just lost a child to a gun that parent kept in the house. that should cure the romance.

[bukowskiforever]

93. I don't see guns as "tools"

I see them as awful, terrible, repulsive objects which serve only one purpose: to kill. Knives cut things besides human flesh, and you can't kill someone from a distance with a knife. The illusion that they make one safer in one's home is unfortunate. I would imagine that most people are surprised by intruders and don't have the time to grab a gun. And I just would feel very uncomfortable living under the same roof with a firearm!

[demodonkey]

113. I live on a farm. To me, yes, a gun is a tool.

Here's an example. A sick raccoon once came around our house and livestock. Staggering badly and it was out in broad daylight (healthy raccoons are nocturnal.) Very probably rabid.

I was very glad I had my .22 rifle to quickly put the poor suffering animal out of its misery with one shot -- while being able to protect my family and our domestic animals from a potential case of rabies.

On edit: the above said, I would never want a gun or tote one in someplace like Lower Manhattan (where I have also lived) or D.C. (where I went to grad school) anymore than I would want to carry a pitchfork around those cities.

[Taverner]

98. I agree with that

And I also agree with the NRA that gun safety should be taught at all elementary schools

I mean, guns DO exist. We have to live with them. NRA, despite all of their RW BS they do, does run a good Gun Safety program.

[tburnsten]

106. That's the NRA-ILA group

Affiliated, but not the same. NRA proper deals only with safety programs and competitions, that sort of thing. The NRA-ILA is the group that is political, and even so they base their support of candidates entirely on their voting record and statements regarding guns, nothing else. The only reason they appear to be highly right-wing is because over the last twenty or so years a very large portion of Democratic politicians have been caught up in the anti-gun zealots agendas, whether or not they truly understood what they were supporting. See Carolyn McCarthy's "shoulder thing that goes up" interview for a perfect example of that. She was asked repeatedly what a barrel shroud is and when she finally couldn't ignore the question any longer that is how she described them.



That is not a barrel shroud at all.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

112. .

[GreenPartyVoter]

116. I would consider letting my boys learn about gun safety in a couple of years. For now they

know enough to never handle a gun and to get away from another kid who is fooling around with one.

[Fleshdancer]

4. I'm all for early education

and after reading the entire op-ed, this parent seems to do a great job of educating his daughter on guns and gun safety. The one question I have for him is how he deals with (or plans to deal with) the friends of his daughter that come over to play.

Is gun education similar to sex education in the sense that educating your own child is viewed as the responsible thing to do but educating someone else's kid is a no-no?

[crispini]

12. That's a very good question.

I can see he may be in for some interesting conversations with other parents.

I think the guy actually DOES sound reasonable, but at the same time I think the column was written to shock and pique our interest (why I posted it :D ) and I also think it's kind of sad that guns are so prevalent in our society that it is necessary to teach gun safety to a five year old.

[tburnsten]

He is probably just excited to spend more time with his daughter

And get to bring her out and teach her the art of shooting, it is fun, challenging, and requires much discipline. I think his little bit about teaching her to be capable of rendering a gun safe should another child find one was just an excuse to go out and get his little girl a rifle so he can spend some time on the range with her.


Parenting isn't all about the kids.

[derby378]

111. In a purely urban setting, I see your point...

...but how do you feel about rural areas, especially remote or sparse areas like Loving County?

[madmom]

26. Hopefully the guns are not in the kids toy box!

[Fleshdancer]

29. well no, but if it's loaded and not locked up...

then there's a chance that other kids could get to it. On the flip side, if my daughter was at a house that kept a loaded gun anywhere accessible, I would want to know.

[madmom]

79. responsible ownership= the gun is in their/owners control, not just laying around loose. I really

can't see where a lot of people think gun owners just leave these things lying around like books or toys or what ever! EVERYONE I know has their guns well contained as in under lock and key!

[tburnsten]

52. Gun safety and sex ed are in no way similiar

Aside from the fact that some fringe people take vehement exception to the idea of their child being exposed in any way to it. I mean basic sex ed, nothing crazy that most parents would have an issue with.

I think that teaching a child that isn't yours about gun safety is acceptable to a point, it is something that you should let the parents know about ahead of time before you take them on a range trip, but there are no ethical or moral hangups against it otherwise.


For the record I am an expecting father, and my daughter will have a similiar downsized .22 to learn to shoot and physically practice the safety lessons she will learn ahead of time on, and I will probably have to get it in pink because her mom is going to demand it. And then probably claim it as her own.

[MrCoffee]

5. I agree with that article

"If she grew up ignorant about guns or worse, in awe of them like they were some forbidden fruit, the world would be a much more dangerous place for her. I think it's better she not only understand that they are just tools, but that she's trained to disarm a curious kid playing with a found one. And then even fieldstrip it on the spot, rendering it safe until an adult can be found.

In no other area of life does ignorance bestow safety. Why should this be any different?"


:thumbsup:

[The Straight Story]

6. Great minds think alike

:)

[MrCoffee]

9. Now you're just freaking me out.

[jobycom]

89. So lower the age for driving, drinking, sexual consent, and voting to 5?

I don't disagree with the article, but if he's going to make generalizations, be consistent. Otherwise the generalizations don't prove his points.

Funny article. There are times it's hard to tell when he's serious, satirical, or self-mocking. Well written.

[Tindalos]

8. Her mom has Hello Kitty on her butt??

Ummm . . . I think I'll refrain from further comment.

:hide:

[appal_jack]

53. certainly not a deal breaker in my book... (n/t)

:hide:

[awoke_in_2003]

71. That struck me funny, too...

shouldn't the tattoo be on the front? :)

[babylonsister]

10. I'm so relieved this wasn't a firsthand story from you!

:rofl: And :wtf:

[crispini]

14. Hee hee hee hee hee.

I confess I posted this mostly for the fun title. :evilgrin:

[aikoaiko]

16. Its a great idea to train children early on the responsibilities of gun ownership.

I thought about following the same plan. Get an real-look plastic pellet gun and have them treat it as a firearm. When I'm confident that my son knows how to safely handle and maintain a plastic pellet gun, then move on up to the .22lr rifle.

[ogneopasno]

18. While it's not exactly the same,

this is what we've done with our kids and bows-and-arrows. It makes a lot of sense.

[Hangingon]

36. We gave our grand kids guns.

With their parents' approval, each got a .22 bolt action on thier 10th birthday. They learned to use and care for the weapon and appreciate the need for gun safety. The guns are kept in the family gun safes when not in use and the kids do not keep ammunition. The grand kids have also learned to use power tool and they know how to cook a breakfast in the family kitchen. I don't know about birth control but they have heard from their parents about stds and sexual responsibility.

[Lorien]

19. Why not buy her her first vibrator while he's at it?

The man is fucking depraved. His child should know NOT TO TOUCH GUNS at that age. Geez-let her HAVE a childhood before scaring the shit out of her with tales of a dangerous world in which she has to protect herself with a firearm!

And check out the comments section. There are nuts actually agreeing with this bit of "satire" (if it even is satire).

[babylonsister]

20. No kidding. I'm 52 and my family never owned guns. Why is this

being praised? I'm dumbstruck by the mindset.

[nosillies]

33. Same here -- they weren't a part of our lifestyle.

Yet somehow, I still managed to learn that they were dangerous and were to be treated with respect and I learned how they should be properly handled. All without ever having one in my house.

You don't have to be exposed to something to learn about its dangers. I think we all know that AIDS is pretty deadly, but we didn't need to be infected with HIV and go a few rounds of anti-retroviral drugs to learn that lesson.

[MicaelS]

38. Texas is gun country

A kid getting his / her first rifle is a rite of passage in many families. And knowledge IS power, whether you like it or not.

[babylonsister]

43. At age 5? Gimme a break. Whatever 'trips your trigger', but I didn't

grow up with that mindset.

[NeedleCast]

50. Yes, at age five

Why not? I'm going to assume you grew up in an urban area but there's really no "mind set" to it. By the age of 4 or 5 (don't remember which) I could shoot cans with a pretty good degree of accuracy. Now, we're talking about shooting a small .22 rifle on a 300 acre ranch, not in a suburban backyard here. It had nothing to do with a mind set of fear or thinking we'd have to defend ourselves. It was just about shooting a green beans can...

[Lorien]

104. Darwinism at work.

I grew up in Ohio, a state which is chock full of gun loving Rednecks who love shooting crap for "sport". They often end up shooting each other, the neighbor (killed a woman hanging her laundry out to dry because they "mistook her for a deer" and got off scott free because the judge was an avid hunter), and their own kids- LOTS of kids in Ohio are injured or killed by firearms. My friend Andrew loved his guns and thought he had taught his kids gun safety. One evening his three year old son found his "safely stored" rifle and accidentally shoot himself with it, dying instantly. Andrew took his own life with a handgun a year later. If he weren't such a fan of firearms both tragedies never would have happened. The gun loving culture is sheer madness.

[tburnsten]

107. If he had excercised a moderate amount of responsibility

His three year old would not have been able to get ahold of a loaded rifle. I am not supporting suicide here, but any parent in that situation has got to give it some serious consideration, I just don't see how anyone healthy could not consider it after their child died as a direct result of their negligence as a parent.


Three year olds are not safecrackers, there are some good quality safes that cost very little out there.

[appal_jack]

31. City dweller?

I'm going to take a wild guess and state that Lorien and Babylonsister are city dwellers. Whether this guess of mine is right or not is not as relevant as the mistaken assumption that Lorien makes when she posits that the father is "scaring the shit out of her (i.e.- the 5-y-o) with tales of a dangerous world in which she has to protect herself with a firearm"

I was a city dweller as a kid myself, and only got to learn some gun safety and shooting skills on boy scout trips back then (and I am eternally grateful to those scout masters who volunteered their time and skills to us kids), but now I am happily an adult rural mountain dweller. And in my neck of the woods, there are plenty of reasons for children to learn proper firearm safety. As the author of the posted column notes, more than 60% of his neighbors' households are likely to have firearms in them, and not all of those neighbors may be properly storing their guns under lock & key. And while 5 is certainly too young to allow for unsupervised use of anything ballistic (pellet gun or firearm), it is a great time for all kids to learn the basics of safety, responsibility, and complex thought. The child of a carpenter should know about safe practices around hammers & saws: the child of a firearms owner should similarly know about safe practices around guns.

If I had a 5 year old child, I would do much the same: emphasize the core rules (all guns are always loaded, never point the barrel at anything that is not to be destroyed, finger off the trigger, check any firearm handed to you, no such thing as a "safety.") If a child demonstrates the ability to absorb and model those behaviors under supervision by 5 or 6; then by 7 or so they will be capable of using a pellet rifle for groundhog patrol in the vegetable patch, Then, by 10 or so, they can accompany dad or mom on a deer-hunting foray. Both of these activities can be an important part of rural food security, so please spare me any lectures about killing thumper & bambi too.

-app

[wtmusic]

37. You have mines in the front yard too?

Fast-access gun safes that may be stashed around the house, near all points of entry and common seating areas?

Gullible much?

[appal_jack]

44. mines are still on the 'to do' list

No mines in my yard yet, but with the ongoing bankrupting of America being accelerated by this thieving "Bailout," likely to create hordes of hungry and desperate bandits, I may have to get to them sooner rather than later.




Note: the above sentence is :sarcasm: , but there are days when I wonder whether the sentiment should in fact be serious.


Anyway, I assume that the writer is hyping-up his collection and stashing methods a bit, but the fact remains that many Americans own guns, and those who do have an obligation to teach their children EXACTLY those safety rules that the author outlines.

So no, I'm not feeling too gullible here. But thanks for asking. :hi:

-app

[awoke_in_2003]

77. There is a faction

of people here that are rabidly anti-guns. Don't waste your time bring up good points, you will only spin them into a bigger frenzy.

[appal_jack]

82. I love annoying this 'faction'

The gun issue is the #1 reason why many of my neighbors will not vote Democratic, despite it otherwise being very much in their interest to do so. I feel it important that we pro-RKBA Dem's make our (pro-Constitution, pro-America, and pro-Democratic) opinions known loudly and proudly here at DU.

And if that spins the 'grabbers' into a frenzy, well... there are worse hobbies I suppose...

}(

-app

[crispini]

83. Considering the subject line of the OP...

this thread is surprisingly flame-free, for the moment. Hee.

[tburnsten]

86. For the most part it has been very civil

Which is great! I have only read a few replies that are insulting or intentionally offensive to others, unsurprisingly though they are all posted by people who seem to have a personal problem with gun ownership.

[awoke_in_2003]

103. I don't try to annoy them...

I have tried to bring up points before to no avail. I will say one thing- if they want to have nothing to do with firearms, I have absolutely no problem with that whatsoever. I just wish that some wouldn't go to the extreme of "oh, you own guns, you must have land mines in the front yard". Just because one owns a gun does not make them a paranoid whack job. Great thing about this country, we can still make some choices.

[crispini]

39. I'm reasonably sure that the columnist is also a city dweller

since the column is running in the Dallas Morning News.

I confess, I can't make up my mind about this column. There is certainly a lot of responsibility there (good for the dad) but something about it just creeps me out. :shrug:

[tburnsten]

66. Are you unfamiliar with firearms?

That would probably be the cause of your creeping sensation, and it would probably go away with a fairly small amount of exposure to guns and recreational shooting. If you grew up with no guns in the house and only ever saw them on police officers or in the hands of people doing bad things on the news, than you will likely have that feeling about anything gun related until you get some first hand experience with them.

Just a thought, it is a pretty common phenomenon, a little bit of time on the range would probably eliminate most or all of your unease, and the "what-if" statements about the guy would probably seem a little silly. Guns are valuable and potentially dangerous, people have a strong tendency to keep them under lock and key.

[crispini]

84. You might be right.

But, dude, she's FIVE. Maybe I'm just idealistic but can't our little ones be kept with Disney and suchlike until they're at least, I dunno, 10?

[tburnsten]

85. More time spent outdoors with dad

Sounds like exactly the right thing to me, again this might just be a symptom of unfamiliarity but shooting sports and even the most unstructured recreational shooting involves a lot of time outdoors, building discipline and self control. Unless you are one of the myriad idiot thugs and mall ninjas who just has to post videos of dangerous and stupid behavior with a gun you managed to buy. Those fools ruin the perception of gun owners and shooters held by non owners and non shooters in the worst way.

Plus it isn't like she'll have unrestricted access to it. Did you ever have anything as a kid that was *yours* even if you weren't allowed to use it all the time?

[EFerrari]

91. Doesn't photography do the same thing without the potential

for shooting off your face?

lol

My dad taught me to shoot -- when I was 40. I loved it. But, seriously, there are a lot of things to do outdoors with your dad when you're a kid.

[tburnsten]

95. Not sticking it under your chin

also eliminates the potential for shooting off your face. There are more than one or two ways to enjoy the outdoors, shooting happens to be one of them. You don't have to participate or own a gun, but please don't be bigoted against people who do. Almost all of us are fine members of our communities and families.

[EFerrari]

97. Bigoted? I asked a question,

[tburnsten]

109. Yes you did

And it displayed a very common bigotry in it, the anti-gun owner bigotry.

[Bill McBlueState]

72. If guns are really necessary for people to be safe,

I'd expect people in the cities to be more likely to own guns than people in the country, since crime rates are higher in cities.

The fact that gun enthusiasts say "city dweller" when they mean "people who don't use guns" is a sign that gun ownership is more of a cultural phenomenon than a rational reaction to high crime rates.

[NeedleCast]

49. I used rifles at that age

I shot at empty vegetable and beer cans out at my grandfathers ranch (under adult supervision of course). It had nothing to do with being fearful of the outside world. Just an enjoyable activity.

Many "nuts" right here on DU seem to agree that it's fine as well.

[fascisthunter]

56. I Grew Up in a City that Was Pretty Rough

and never felt the need to own a gun... I guess I learned how not to be afraid and how to deal with people. All those I grew up with also never needed a gun.... only thugs did. Seems all these gun nuts want us to live in their fear based reality, so we too should own guns like they do.... yeah, that's the ticket. I'm still waiting for the gun nuts to defend themselves from this government....

[tburnsten]

61. Way to overreact

Did you even read the article?


:+

[bread_and_roses]

27. The depth of ignorance about child development displayed by anyone giving a five year old a gun

is almost beyond comprehension. It is unconscionable. I would not have believed that anyone outside some lunatic fringe would advocate or support such dangerous idiocy. I guess there are areas in which I am still naive.

When I read the "mines in the yard" line I was sure the writer was spoofing - but the rest doesn't read like a spoof? Or is it a very subtle spoof only obvious to the cognoscenti? Are are the all in favor of guns-for-kindergartners here spoofing? Someone help me here?

[appal_jack]

34. a "gift" does not mean "posession"

Many of my neighbors have "given" their young children pellet rifles and .22's. But that does not mean that the rifles are stored in the childrens' room next to the Lego's. The guns are 'theirs,' but locked in the safe with all the other firearms, and taken out and used only under adult supervision.

-app

[wtmusic]

35. The subtelty of the satire is er...backfiring nt

[crispini]

41. I think the "mines in the yard" is a joke.

Maybe.

[GDAEx2]

30. IT"S SATIRE!!! n/t

[crispini]

40. Honey, no it's not. Did you read the whole thing?

This ran in a TEXAS newspaper. I'd bet you a hundred dollars it's not satire.

[SmokingJacket]

32. I agree that knowledge is better than ignorance.

That's why I told my kids exactly what happened to my best friend's brother, when we were 9 and he was fourteen. He was goofing around with a gun and blew his head off.

And I also told them how another friend succumbed to a suicidal impulse and used his hunting rifle.

My kids have no interest in guns, and I have no interest in giving them one.

That said, I do know that some kids are fascinated with guns, to an almost unhealthy degree. If I had a kid like that, I probably would let him have one, and have him take safety lessons and join a target shooting club or something.

[9thkvius]

42. It sure looks like satire to me

and yeah, the bit about the claymores in the yard seemed to be a dead giveaway in that regard.

Still, the sad truth is that I know a lot of people who would not have any problem handing a 5 year old child a firearm.

[LanternWaste]

51. Oh well-- it *is* Dallas....

Oh well-- it *is* Dallas (although I didn't really really need any more reasons to travel east of 360, this is a fine one...)

[jmondine]

57. This is the guy with a son named Mike Teevee, right?

"Not till you're twelve, son." ;)

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

59. Is he going to get her a supply of Red Man and Jack Danials to complete her education?

Just what the country needs another "real Man" like Sarah Palin.

[flvegan]

60. When she's 6, she gets a pit bull and a pack of smokes.

Come on people! This one is screaming to be an epic flamewar.

:popcorn:

[demmiblue]

63. WTF?

A pit bull is far more dangerous than a Hello Kitty rifle. Get with the program, dumb ass!

:rofl:

:popcorn:

[flvegan]

68. Aha!

But what if the pit bull is wearing a Hello Kitty sweater?

NOW we're getting somewhere.

:popcorn:

[demmiblue]

76. Hmmm....

I am of two positions on this:

a) What kind of pit bull would be wearing a Hello Kitty Sweater?

b) What kind of pit bull wouldn't be wearing a Hello Kitty sweater?

Screw it... they are both far more lethal than a Hello Kitty rifle.

I mean, really, a Hello Kitty rifle is so cute! How could it hurt anybody?

[msanthrope]

81. Is she still being breastfed??? In the Olive Garden???

[Dr. Strange]

87. Good idea.

The smoking will calm her during the female genital circumcision.

:popcorn: x 2

[appal_jack]

94. only if...

The pit bull has to get a tattoo of Hello Kitty on its butt too!

That way, we can have flame wars about:
pitbulls
the cruelty of tattooing animals
not to mention 'tutching the but'

And if the Hello Kitty tat has really convincing artwork, then the pitbull might just spend its life chasing its own hind end.

-app

[Critters2]

62. Geez. How have I managed to live for 50 years without once touching a gun? nt

[galileoreloaded]

64. I wonder if some of you would freak out walking into the home of a LEO???

There are certainly guns about, and they often have children. Would you let your children go over to play there??? Realistically, the safest possible environment on earth, the home of a sworn American officer.

99% of gun owners, anecdotal evidence of course, that I meet are safety fanatics.

Morgan Spurlock did a great "30 days" on this and the results were interesting.

An interesting quote comes to mind, "Those that beat their arms into plowshares, end up being ruled by those that don't." Something like that anyway.

[RamboLiberal]

88. While I'd bet most LEOs with kids store their guns safely

Sadly I've read a number of stories over the years of a kid accidentally killing or shooting themselves or someone else with the LEO parents gun.

And I've also read of a number of LEOs who did not practice gun safety and killed/wounded themselves or others with their gun or had an negligent discharge.

So I wouldn't assume they are all safe households with guns.

And no I'm not anti-gun. In fact I own several handguns and have a CCW.

[Lucian]

65. That guy is fucking insane.

Why the hell would anyone buy a five year old a fucking gun?

Jesus Christ. She's going to grow up and end up like Sarah Palin.

[tuckessee]

67. I had a Sears Ted Williams 22LR single shot by about age 6.

It was my own personal rifle though my dad kept in an unlocked closet in his bedroom until I got to be about 10-12.

My family taught us well how to shoot and how to be responsible with firearms. No one has ever had an accident. We are not hunters, either.

[Better Today]

70. The only thing that bothers me is the color and kitty emblem; make it seems like a toy.

[defendandprotect]

75. Right.....fastest gun wins ---

too bad, grandma -- ya just too slow ---

[msanthrope]

80. It's satire. Claymores in the front yard??? Sure, it's Texas, but

come on.....

[MicaelS]

96. The part about claymores is satire

But I think the rest of the column is quiye serious. See his website. http://www.treygarrison.com/ He rails against the stupidity of MADD, which I agree with.

[LisaL]

114. If the author was going for satire, I don't think he did a good job of it.

Satire has a point. What would be a point of this? I don't think it's satire.

[reggie the dog]

99. my father started my on pistols at age five

he had a .22 six shooter for me. We spent rainly weekends putting primers in used bullet cases, then weighing and loading the powder, then putting on the tips, sometimes hollow pointed, in a manual machine in our house. Ah fond memories of childhood.

[seemslikeadream]

101. THE CROW ON THE CRADLE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Py5I8Z-aM0

[Guaranteed]

102. Too young.

Seven is the age of reason and you should wait a few years beyond that anyway.

It's important children are exposed to guns and understand their power, but there is such thing as exposing them too early.

[OakCliffDem]

105. Kick

[marions ghost]

108. Our neighborhood was terrorized

for a few years while a gun-totin kid "grew up." Nobody knew when he would decide to rip off a few shots with his high-powered rifle. It was always random. By the time the cops got there he was gone and his folks played dumb. Nobody could do anything about it.

Welcome to Murka.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

115. if Palin gets in people will need their right to bear arms