for sale: DU defcon insurance....

[mike_c]

Yep, that's right. Reading all about the financial crisis made me realize what a chump I've been, living within my means and all that.

So here's the deal. I'm offering DU DEFCON insurance to insure your DU experience tonight during the Obama/McLame debate. I'm offering four levels of insurance, to cover everyone's risk. Here's how it works:

Level 1. $100 per policy. If DU goes to DEFCON 1 during the debate I'll pay all Level 1 policy holders ONE MILLION DOLLARS! Yepper, that's $1,000,000.00 greenback pics of George Washington. How patriotic is that?

Level 2. The risk of impacting your DU experience is greater at DEFCON 2, so the price for covering that risk is higher. Level 2 policies are $200. So if DU goes to DEFCON 2 during the debate I'll pay Level 2 policy holders TWO MILLION DOLLARS! Yay! Money for nothing!

Level 3. Increased risk, increased price AND payoff. Level three policies cost $300 each. If DU goes to DEFCON 3 during the debate I'll pay THREE MILLION DOLLARS to all Level 3 policy owners.

Level MAXIMUM ELITE YEAH BABEEEE! This is the big one. Policies are $500 each, but if DU crashes during the debate I'll pay all elite level policy holders TEN MILLION DOLLARS A MONTH FOR LIFE! Bring. It. On!

I'm going to use the policy orders as collateral to secure a bank credit line for ONE BILLION YANQUE GREENBACKS to cover any potential payouts, so buy 'em now before the price goes up closer to debate time!

If it all goes balls-up, Congress will bail us out! YIPPEEEE! I'M GONNA BE RICH!

[NMDemDist2]

1. ....

:spank:

:rofl:

[lonestarnot]

2. Glad you took care of him!

:rofl:

[clear eye]

3. ROFL

Who says ordinary folk can't do things like the big guys?

[mike_c]

6. who you callin' "ordinary folk?"

Donald Trump just called to ask whether I can drop by the wrap party after the debate!

[Kaufman_Lib]

4. Dats funny right there!

n/t

[rateyes]

5. I want the MAXIMUM ELITE YEAH BABEEEE policy. Here's my $500:

And, one of the $100 policies, too. There's an extra hundred there.

[mike_c]

7. it's all about the Benjamins!

:bounce:

[rateyes]

8. I want my signed contract. Not gonna let you rip me off.

:evilgrin: