Have you ever cheated?

[mudesi]

This is the Internet, and the poll is anonymous even more so without screen names. So there is no reason to lie.

Have you ever cheated on someone, whether it be your wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, or otherwise someone with whom you had promised to stay committed?

To those willing to admit it, feel free to reply and explain your reasons, if there were any.

For the record, I have never cheated, but I understand why it happens and suffice to say I have had my share of close calls.

[NeedleCast]

1. Never

Not even on a girlfriend.

[Redstone]

2. Why are so many people asking that on DU? (Just a joke; I do know why.)

So, for the fiftieth time, no.

Redstone

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

3. Yes, I have on a boyfriend and my ex-husband. The consequence of the last time has had very sad

very far reaching affects on my family and on others. Although I still love the man (and he has since died), in hindsight, I would never have done it.

BTW..I wasn't running for President and under a microscope.

[krabigirl]

4. Yes, on a boyfriend. Shoot me. He was a jerk of epic proportions. But is kissing cheating?

[rucky]

6. Only if there was tounge. n/t

[supernova]

5. No I have not cheated

On the other hand, I can't say what I would do if presented with that situation, as the cheated on or the cheatee.

And no, I don't think it has any bearing on how well someone would perform their duties in office. If you insist that only perfect people run, then evetually even good enough and non-cheaters will not want to run because they, rightly IMO, don't want to deal with the misguided scrutiny.

edit: Back in January, I was offered the "opportunity" to be the third person in a triangle, even with the consent of the first partner. I declined.

[kwolf68]

7. No, but I was with women who were cheating

I also know I am not the type of person I want leading our nation and the Dem Party...I want men/persons better than me.

[bicentennial_baby]

8. Yep

I don't feel the need to explain my reasons...at least not to DU. :)

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

9. Yes. On my ex-wife. For the same reason everydody does.

Because I wanted to.

[Edweird]

10. No. That being said, I am married, but that relationship is dead.

We are still legally married until one of files for divorce. My wife has "green lighted" extramarital activities. No children and we now live over a 1000 miles apart.I don't think any reasonable person would consider that cheating.

I HAVE, however, been the man women have cheated on their significant others with (a lot). When I was younger and much more callous (and better looking) it was a game for me. I am apparently a great lay but a terrible boyfriend/husband.

[Warpy]

11. The results I see at this point

aren't far off what Kinsey found.

Men are slightly more likely than women to cheat, but this is likely a function of increased opportunity for males rather than the moral superiority of the female sex.

[Lisa0825]

12. No. If I want to play the field, I don't get into or stay in a commited relationship. nt

[AlCzervik]

13. No.

I never had the time, energy or inclination. Now that i'm at the advanced age of 41 (omg how did that happen?) i really don't have the energy.

Signed CRS your "Lift one corner to vent" queen.

[Lyric]

14. Yes. Explanation below.

My ex-husband was becoming more and more abusive. I wanted to leave, but had no resources to get away--he had spent all of our savings on illegal drugs without telling me (he had put himself in charge of the savings account, and I was too young and stupid to question it at the time.)

I met someone on the internet and fell in love, but never told anyone--not even the person that I had fallen in love with. I went for a "visit" at the end of June, 1999, and everything "clicked". I had sex while I was there. I came back home for two weeks--long enough to secretly pack my stuff and make arrangements to safely leave the abuser. Then I left and moved in with my current partner, and never looked back. We've been together for about nine years now.

I guess it was technically cheating, because the first sex occurred while I was still married to my ex. But I did have every intention of ending the relationship, and I did so as soon as I safely could once I returned. It's not easy to leave an abuser. To this day it amazes me that he even allowed me to go on that visit; I suppose he thought it was safe, because I was visiting a woman. It's a good thing he didn't realize that I was bisexual. Otherwise I might still be trapped there.

[Lisa0825]

15. I think a lot of people "use" cheating as a way out.

And that is far different that than people who just really don't care about hurting someone by straying. Your ex had already broken your commitment by being abusive to you. I'm glad that you got out and got your fresh start in life.

[Lyric]

19. Me too. And I have never lied or cheated on my current partner.

We have an agreement that, if either of us is "tempted", we'll talk about it and find a solution together. So long as there aren't any lies, and both of us agree, we're not totally closed to the idea of a playmate. It hasn't happened *yet*, but at least we're prepared in advance for it, if it ever *does* happen.

[Edweird]

16. I don't consider that cheating.

That's ending a relationship and moving on to a new one in my book.

[Lyric]

17. I agree with you, but I have seen a few DU'ers

claim that *any* sex while married to someone else is cheating, no matter the circumstances. I suppose I *could* have waited to have sex. But you know, he was hurting me on a daily basis by then. I guess I didn't feel like he deserved my fidelity at that point, and to be honest, I was starving for a touch that didn't hurt.

:hug:

[seabeyond]

21. i read your story and i didnt consider it "really" cheating either

you had already ended it in the head and followed thru immediately. your intent was clear. intent is more important than most anything. but ya.... i am sure their are those that will say cheating is cheating....

whatever

it is yours to be true to your heart

[MorningGlow]

18. I voted "yes" b/c I was "the other woman" once

Not proud of it by any stretch, but it happened, and I've come to terms with it (it was a LONG time ago). Why did I do it? Because I was sincerely in love with the guy. Dumb move, I know, but when he approached me about a relationship, any common sense I THOUGHT I had went right out the window.

My experience helps me be more forgiving of Edwards. I know first hand how endorphins or whatever brain chemicals kick in make you forget about anything and anyone else. It really is like being on drugs--you just kind of "go stupid", justify your actions, don't think how it will hurt yourself or other people (at least, not for very long--any responsible thoughts get shoved out of your brain immediately), and don't think about the future. I don't doubt for a second that Edwards truly believed he wouldn't get caught.

I can tell all of DU one thing: I guarantee that when he was with Reille, he WASN'T thinking about you or any other voters. He wasn't even capable of it.

[wellstone dem]

20. Only on a test, and then only once.

I was in middle school and a teacher accidentally held up the key to the test and I looked and checked my answers.

[CTyankee]

22. Well, during the 04 election I had a couple of interesting dreams about John Kerry.

I am happily married and in my 60s so I was a little surprised when I had two very obvious sexual dreams about me and John Kerry. It seems we met at a dinner party and began to talk and things got interesting. Later I had another dream that continued the first one. I didn't tell my husband cuz I thought he would think I'm crazy, but I wondered at the time why I had them. I'm not at all ashamed or upset about them. In fact, I think they were cool. I am the same age as Theresa so maybe that had something to do with it. Actually, in real life I don't find Kerry sexually attractive so it was odd...