I can't stop laughing. Hey, Sen. Stevens, I got your "tubes" right here. Hanging.

[Redstone]

(As they say in Brooklyn.)

Redstone

[Tangerine LaBamba]

1. Shhhhhhhhhh

When you laugh out loud like that, the echoes off the tubes make it hard for the Internets to work.

[Redstone]

2. Oh, jeez, I'm sorry; I forgot about the resonant-cavity effect in those Internet tubes. And hey,

I'm not sure we've "met" before (but remember, I'm the guy with the four concussions, so we may very well have); if we haven't, I'm pleased to meet you.

Redstone

[Tangerine LaBamba]

3. Let me refresh your recollection

"Life begins when the kids leave for college and the dog dies."

I'm amazed that I remember that, but, you know, Redstone, you're memorable.

Now, I must continue polishing my Internets tubes with Blue Coral Car Wax, which, I have discovered, not only makes the reception clearer, especially when The Lawrence Welk Show is on, but affords me a lovely surface on which to practice my cha-cha.

[Redstone]

4. Ah, God damn, how could I have forgotten THAT! (Did I mention the

four concussions?) I'm really sorry; I feel like I've insulted you, expecially given how much I liked that phrase (yes, I do remember it now that you repeated it).

(THAT will teach you to try to maintain a rational correspondence with an old guy who hit his head a lot when he was young.)

Redstone

[Tangerine LaBamba]

5. Uh-huh

Did you say something? I got Blue Coral in my ears.

Where were we?

Four concussions? That's impressive. When did you figure out that using your head to open heavy doors probably wasn't a good idea? And you would never insult me, Redstone. Anyone who appreciates that line, that joke, has my eternal vote.

Speaing of old, "What?"

[Redstone]

6. One playing football; one in a cliff-climbing fall; one in a car before I got

smart enough to understand that you NEVER unbuckle your seatbelt unless you're a complete imbecile (It was in the speed stage of a night rally, and unbuckled to scratch an itch (don't ask) just when I was shooting across a double-crowned road intersection and found out to my chagrin that the Volvo I was driving had a steel brace RIGHT above my head); and the other, well, we don't discuss that. We just don't.

Redstone