Mission Like Totally Accomplished, Yo!

[JeffR]

Oh yeah! The fifth anniversary of the super-duper, mud-in-yer-eye, lump-in-yer-throat, bulge-in-your-pants, photo-opstravaganzalicious Big Kahuna of All-American American holidays. It's the most wonderful time of the year, with all due respect to Christmas, Easter and those other high holy days the godless commies want to have expunged from the calendars of this fine Christian nation.

Happy Codpiece Day!

Remember the thrill of it all? An aircraft carrier, a big-ass aircraft carrier just like in the movies, only real. A fighter jet "piloted" by the President, just like he used to do in Alabama, that great state still safe and unblemished by the Vietcong to this very day! And that big, bold, beautiful, bad-ass banner the Bush Administration has modestly spent the last 48 months disclaiming responsibility for, generously crediting the crew of the USS Abraham Lincoln, excessive sunspot activity, Bill Clinton, space aliens, whatever… anything to avoid the slightest hint of hubris or vainglory.

And, lest we forget, that package, that weaponry! Rama-lama-ding-dong, cock-a-doodle-dandy and ooh-la-la, lock up your daughters, soccer moms! Tie Chris Matthews down too, somebody…



Okay, we could beat that to death, but the Decider hates to be a hot dog, so please, let’s not embarrass him on this joyous day of celebration.

Think back now. See the picture coming into focus again?

"In the Battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed."

Dude! Major combat operations in Iraq are over! We put a boot up their ass, it’s the American way!

Our GIs tossing Hershey bars and Juicy Fruit to throngs of jubilant Iraqis in the streets of Baghdad! An amazing self-financing gosh-darn shootin’ war! Electricity flowing through the wires and oil through the pipelines! Schools actually rebuilding themselves, brick by miraculous brick! Iraqi kids, those swarthy little heathen scamps, knocking that Saddam statue down with their Air Jordans and generously building us a huge embassy with their bare little Mohammedan hands!

A free and democratic - uh, Republican Iraq! A beacon in the Middle East!

Remember?

No?

Come on, it was only four years ago! Anybody?

Popular wartime President, hmm? Permanent Republican majority, hmm? Remember? Who's with me here?

It’s Codpiece Day, for the love of Pete! Get with the spirit of the holiday.

May all your troubles be little ones! Rise, rise America! Shake your money-maker! Wave your sunny nobility for the cameras! Don't shrink from the excitement! Stand tall! Don't dick around, get hip to the freedom vibe! Have a cigar! Have a sausage!

Piss on those Islamofascists! Fuck Saddam, we took him out! Balls to the wall! Screw the naysaying America-haters!

Let’s roll! Johnson Wax up your waterboards! Nuts to the terrorists! Stiff upper lip, as they say in the Mother Country! You can't keep America down! Surge with pride! Release your inner patriot! Pump it up! Tie a yellow ribbon ‘round it! Ride, captain, ride! Do it, do it, do it till you’re satisfied! Supersize it! Have a swell time! Bust a move! Reach for the sky! Free Willy! And buy something, buy something big!

Victory! The Bush Doctrine! Five rugs for five bucks! It just don’t get better than this, y’all!

Have a big ol’ swingin' Codpiece Day!

No?

Nothing?

Hmm.

You know, the problem with you leftists is you just haven’t been paying attention.

[unhappycamper]

1. Codpiece Day?

Brilliant. Absolutelyfrigginbrilliant.

[Th1onein]

13. OooLaLa! Cock-a-doodle-dee!

It's Codpiece Day again! Bush sent a MANLY SURGE into Iraq!

[Contrary1]

28. For sure!

It was absolutely a break-out-the-4th-tube sock occasion! What a man. Damn, I needs me a shower.

Notice how the troops that flank the commander don't quite "stack up". Hehehe



Oh, I almost forgot... :patriot:

[ColbertWatcher]

2. Yeah Boy!

[Jennicut]

21. EWWW! That image is now ingrained in my mind once again.

Please make it go away. The last thing I want to see it Georgie's codpiece. McCain would be worse but Georgie's is pretty awful.

[ColbertWatcher]

3. I started this for you...

...Codpiece Day!

Make sure you add stuff to it.

ON EDIT:

I forgot to mention this is the satirical wiki, not the real one, so make sure you write it as if a Repug was writing it.

[JeffR]

23. Thanks. I'll try to add something on it.

:)

[tonkatoy57]

4. Beautiful, just beautiful

You should clean up the profanity, but leave in the snark and send it to your local newspaper.

Just a terrific rememberence for Codpiece Day.

[Demeter]

5. If There's a Reward for Humor Around Here, You Get MY Vote!

Positively what the doctor ordered, if you want to be terminally depressed....in a meaningful way.

The Problem Is: WE HAVE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION! That's what's got them all in a sweat. And we aren't going away any time soon. And we're getting more insistent, and the economy is crumbling, and it looks like he, W, can't take it with him, no matter what it is and where he goes. The horrible stink of failure will never wash away, nor will the threat of retributions.

It sucks to be a shrub.

[shain from kane]

6. Missed it. I was shopping.

[AlCzervik]

7. Love it! Ok who said this?

"You know, he's in his flight suit, he's striding across the deck, and he's wearing his parachute harness, you know -- and I've worn those because I parachute -- and it makes the best of his manly characteristic. You go run those -- run that stuff again of him walking across there with the parachute. He has just won every woman's vote in the United States of America. You know, all those women who say size doesn't count -- they're all liars."

hmm, who remembers this?

[ColbertWatcher]

8. Rove? n/t

[AlCzervik]

9. nope, i'll give you a hint, right after this was said i never wated that program again.

[ColbertWatcher]

10. Softballs? n/t

[AlCzervik]

11. correct! Matthews just needed some lotion and tissues to close the deal.

[glowing]

14. I was going to say.. he salivates all over men.. remember his obsession

with Thompson...

[Th1onein]

15. Are you SERIOUS?

Chris Matthews said THAT?

[AlCzervik]

20. yes he did, that was the dead he was dead to me. Wesely Clark imo had the best ever

quote about that whole scene.

'To me, patriotism is not dressing up in a flight suit and prancing around on the deck of an aircraft carrier,''

[TomInTib]

22. Nailed it, JeffR.

I hope you don't mind if I send this all over the planet.

And if you do mind, well....

too bad.
Tom

[JeffR]

24. Please feel free.

I posted this one year ago. Just changed "fourth" to "fifth" and voila! Another cheap ticket to the Greatest Page.;-)

[JohnnyLib2]

12. Five years and I'm still embarrassed as an American.

Wonder if he'll repeat that scene on Inauguration Day?

Thanks for the skewering.

[GreatCaesarsGhost]

16. Johnny should be marching home again. hooray! hooray!

anyday now.

[lpbk2713]

17. "An' I did it all by myself.*

[Left coast liberal]

18. I love starting my day with a chuckle. You hit it just right.

So very sad but so damn true.

[Ghost in the Machine]

19. !!!!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

25. Can you give yourself a DUzy?

Because this is certainly DUzy-worthy!

Well, at least you're on the Greatest Page!

But dammit, you should have a DUzy!

K&R, Jeff, K&R!

:rofl: :rofl:

:patriot:

[Faux pas]

26. Brilliant! Best read I've had all day. Thanks for the Laugh

JeffR. Nominate yourself for a DUzy Dood!
:woohoo:

[HCE SuiGeneris]

27. !

Big Dick and Lil Bush have lost their sheen. Thanks for adding some polish. Happy f'n Codpiece Day to you too, Jeff!

K & R

[Canuckistanian]

29. Is it Codpeice season already?

Where DOES the time go?