DUs Book of Nonsense (Limericks)

[zeemike]

The Book of nonsense is where the limerick got it’s popularity a long time ago and I have always liked this art form (although some would not agree that it is art) because most people can write one.
So if you like please make one and add it to this thread and make it preferably about DU or current events Perhaps is we have enough we could have our own Book of Nonsense.
I will start it out with this;



The history of DU is unwritten
But Limericks can tell it if smitten
Just write five lines
With two different rhymes
And don’t ever think of quit’n.

There is a board named DU
Why he made it we have only a clue
But his nick name is Skinner
And he did it at dinner
When he saw a bush in his stew.

And another known as Elad
That doesn’t sound so bad
He was supping with Skinner
On that fateful dinner
And the smell of bush made him mad

Now three heads are better than one
And when it was finally done
They stayed up all night
To join in the fight
For Al Gore had actually won.

So deep underground did they go
With there Democratic underground show
And they invited us here
And thought it not queer
To let our safety valve blow

[libodem]

1. Very clever

[zeemike]

2. Add one if you like

It is fun to do.

[Glorfindel]

3. Clever indeed...may I be allowed a humble offering?

Hurrah for the Underground Democratic,
For opposing a state theocratic!
We’re great folks from all parts,
Well versed in the arts,
But none dare call us pragmatic.


:hi: :dem:

[zeemike]

4. I love it n/t

[tkmorris]

9. That's quite good

:toast:

[zeemike]

5. One more just for kicks

Here the topics are serious and witty
But that is not such a pity
All the freepers are mad
At the successes of Skinner and Elad
That there outlook is obviously quite shitty

[zeemike]

6. And I forgot this one

I almost forgot EarlG
I know he was one of the three
Who started it all
Who’s contribution was not small
But my memory was just failing me

[TheDoorbellRang]

7. To Skinner, EarlG, and Elad

My favorite site is DU
With members decidely "Blue"
There are millions of posts
Thanks to genial hosts
Who proudly preside o'er the zoo.

[zeemike]

11. That was great!!!! n/t

[tkmorris]

8. Ok, I'll take a shot

There is this new thread at DU
The poster is flinging some poo
He's hatin' on Clinton
Of her supporters he's hintin'
Edwards and Obama own you

[zeemike]

13. Loved it

:rofl:

[TheDoorbellRang]

17. On the level of discussion as to who's the best candidate

Oh there's Clinton, Kucinich, Obama,
And Biden and Dodd -- what a drama!
Throw in Edwards and Gore
And Gravel...Any more?
Our debate oft descends to "Yo Mama!"

[tkmorris]

28. Brilliant

:toast:

[TheDoorbellRang]

10. Here's another: Reading DU

I start out my day on the Greatest
And then, if there's time, read the Latest
Some threads get an R
and others, an "Arrgh"
Then I'll go to the Lounge -- the sedatest.

[catnhatnh]

12. 'Kay....try this

My country has gone down the tubes,
Ruined by Neocon rubes,
The election is comin'
They'd better start runin'
We'll rip out republicon "pubes"....

See:Any good Limerick will make references to someones "naughty bits"...

[zeemike]

15. you are right about that...they tend to be bawdy n/t

[TheDoorbellRang]

18. You forgot Nantucket...

:rofl:

That was great!

[EarlG]

14. I'll have a go...

Said Dick, "Now then George, as you may know
You're needed down in San Diego."
Said George, "That's too far."
Said Dick, "There's a bar."
Said George, "Well why didn't you say so?"

-----

Alberto Gonzales's claim
Was that somebody else was to blame
"That rat got me booted -
And now prosecuted!
I wish I remembered his name."

-----

Iraq is the whole enchilada
For Condi it couldn't be harder
So many have died
But she just can't decide
If her shoes should be Gucci or Prada.

[zeemike]

16. Earl you are a natural borne limerick poet

Those were great
:woohoo:

[TheDoorbellRang]

19. Awesome!

:applause:

[Rowdyboy]

20. I was tempted to try my hand until I read those three jewels.....

I stand in awe.....

[zeemike]

21. Don't let that stop ya

There is no such thing as a bad Limerick as long as you get the format right.

[DCKit]

22. Classic form:

There once was a President named Gore
Some said he was wooden, a bore
But now he's got Nobel
His cause has gone global
and the Resident is screaming "NO MORE!"

Is Darth Cheney looking for an out?
Unsure of his political clout?
With Alberto gone
His time is not long
Only he knows what this war was about

Ann Coulter is a Republican honey
Hugh Hefner would make her a Bunny
But her crowd likes boys
And despite all the noise
From them he can make no money

Hillary Clinton went up to the Hill
Stuck to her guns and her Husband, Bill
She scares some to death
It may be her breath
But President? Maybe she will

[Kurovski]

23. K&R.

:D !

[DCKit]

24. Run-on Themes

The Freepers are out on the prowl
Hunting Dems they think are so foul
They know they're in danger
Weren't born in a manger
And DU, well that makes them howl

Though Jesus is coming this year
Republics have nothing to fear
The Rapture won't take 'em
But yet they can bake some
'Cause it's clear global warming is here

The icecaps in Greenland are flowing
The facts Al Gore has been showing
In denial are scoffers
Who've emptied our coffers
No talking could stop them it blowing

Our treasure belongs to China
The hawks believe that is minor
When the bill comes due
With interest accrued
They'll reside in a country that's kinder

[Jim Lane]

25. Chiming in on behalf of my candidate

Some DUers are backing Kucinich.
We know that he'll fight to the finish!
If Pelosi and Reid
Won't do what we need
Perhaps they should both eat some spinach.

[proud patriot]

26. I love it

:loveya:

[Patsy Stone]

27. Otay!

I'm having trouble finding a rhyme
to express the amount of time
I spend during the day
refreshing away
DU on the company's dime.