George Bush the Texan is 'scared of horses'

[T_i_B]

Source: Daily Telegraph

President Bush may like to be seen as a swaggering tough guy with a penchant for manly outdoor pursuits, but in a new book one of his closest allies has said he is afraid of horses.

Vicente Fox, the former president of Mexico, derided his political friend as a "windshield cowboy" – a cowboy who prefers to drive – and "the cockiest guy I have ever met in my life".

He recalled a meeting in Mexico shortly after both men had been elected when Mr Fox offered Mr Bush a ride on a "big palomino" horse. Mr Fox, who left office in December, recalled Mr Bush "backing away" from the animal. ''A horse lover can always tell when others don't share our passion," he said, according to the Washington Post.

Mr Bush has spoken of his fondness for shooting doves and cutting brush on his Crawford ranch in Texas, which he bought in 1999. The property reportedly has no horses and only five cattle.

Read more: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/09/21/wbush121.xml

[carpetbagger]

1. Yeah, too bad LBJ's not still around.

He'd make Bush ride 'em, just like he did to Hubert Humphrey.

[saigon68]

92. Texan ? I thought he was a Frat Boy from out East

He does however look like a Chimpanzee

[lligrd]

2. Perhaps He Would Fit In Better With The Asses! nt

[Submariner]

3. Scared of ponies?

Sort of fits his cheerleader AWOL pussy image. World class loser.

[Hulk]

4. He is also afraid of his own shadow.....

The guy is a class act...chickenhawk sack of horse shit!

[Journeyman]

5. Ever since "the incident," Mr Bush has shied away from the ponies. . .

It happened his first year as Governor. Concerned about the impression his non-riding would have with Texas voters, his Staff decided it'd be best if they staged a photo-op on a horse. They picked out the steed they thought best for the novice rider, and two of his aides helped him into the saddle. No sooner was he seated, though, when the horse bolted, took off with no warning whatsoever. Mr Bush clung bravely to the reins, and tried to wrap his legs tight around the haunches, but the speed of the horse, coupled with the wild motion of its galloping, threw Mr Bush from the saddle.

To the horror of all the witnesses, Mr Bush's foot became ensnared in the stirrup, and though he crashed hard to the ground, he was trapped and drug helplessly behind the charging steed. Some of the younger aides rushed after him to help, but it was hopeless -- the galloping beast rushed ahead, and Mr Bush bounced wildly behind, his arms flailing helplessly, his head and shoulders repeatedly smashed on the hard ground beneath the thundering hooves.

It seemed, for a moment, that all was lost and Mr Bush would be pounded to death before his horrified Staff. Shouts of anguish and despair arose from them all and the end seemed inevitable, but fortunately, all the hubbub alerted the WalMart manager, who stepped outside and pulled the plug.

And so, you can understand, ever since "the incident" Mr Bush has shied away from the ponies. . .

[Maccagirl]

6. ROFLMAO

Too excellent! You really had me till the bitter end. I have to clean the soda off my keyboard now...

[lligrd]

7. ROFL nt

[gateley]

9. Author! Author! Take a Bow! nt

[Richard Steele]

10. Oh, you magnificent bastard! You are -SO- getting a DUzy for that! *thumbsup*

[Judi Lynn]

18. Alrighty, now! Way to go! (shrill whistle!)

You got us all with that one. :woohoo:

[Solly Mack]

22. That was beautiful

Really and truly beautiful

[ClayZ]

23. Good one! K and R

[Vinca]

31. LOL - they should have kept him away from the G.I. Joes, too. nt

[bluerum]

38. damn the walmart manager,,,

[HughBeaumont]

44. Nom'd for DUzy of the YEAR.

It's so . . . believable.

Even the WalMart part.

:toast:

[brentspeak]

45. He! he! he!

:thumbsup:

[LibDemAlways]

50. That deserves its own thread. Well done.

[SammyWinstonJack]

53. ...

:spray:

[AnneD]

56. You had me....

racking my Texan brain trying to remember the incident....until the last line :rofl:

[Sequoia]

62. Same here.

I kept thinking, well, where did this Wal-Mart manger come from, was he riding near the store? Too funny!!

[SomeGuyInEagan]

64. Brilliant

Very nice writing, Journeyman.

[htuttle]

72. Bravo, Maestro! Bravo!

[BrklynLiberal]

75. I was rooting for the horse for the entire story.....thinking how grateful the nation would have

been if it has succeeded in its quest.

[ksilvas]

84. Priceless mental image. Thank You. n/t

[susanna]

85. LOL in a BIG way...

...that one had me as one of his usual propoganda puff pieces 'til the end.

Damn, that was funny. Kudos! :-)

[goclark]

93. Can we get him on a pony ever again?

ROTFL

[OnyxCollie]

8. Is he afraid of pretzels, too? nt

[trusty elf]

11. not just unfit, counterfeit!

[Up2Late]

12. I can't help thinking about this Political ad Will Farell did for ACT a few years ago!

<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkqrI3IibYI>

"Will Ferrell as Bush"

Or just watch it here: <http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=385&topic_id=3496&mesg_id=3496>

[mark414]

25. Ferrell is a prophet!

[Arugula Latte]

55. I think Bush's fear of horses has been known for quite awhile.

I remember hearing that years ago ...

[SKKY]

13. Fake Veteran, fake Cowboy...

...is anything about this guy real?

[Hekate]

16. Fake compassion, fake humanity...

[AnneD]

66. You forgot....

Fake Texan. As A REAL TEXAN, that still pisses me off.

LBJ-Real Texan
GWB-Faux Texan

Bill Moyers-Real Texan
Karl Rove-Faux Texan

Dan Rather-Real (Texan) Newsman
Bill O'Rielly-Faux Newsman


Molly Ivins-Real (Texan) Political Writer
Ann Coulter-Faux Political Writer

Hope these example help you determine the Real Texan from the Faux.

[calimary]

76. He's a real ASSHOLE.

'Zat work?

[JohnnyRingo]

14. I always believed this to be true

Because a campaign manager would pay "Ranger money" to have a video of President Shithead striking a Reaganesque pose astride a stalwart steed.

So far, driving a brand new pick-up truck is the best they've had.
It's all stage

[TomInTib]

19. I have the best story, ever....

but I am far too drunk to type...

[Riktor]

15. What the fuck does George know about ranching???

He grew up in the 'burbs in Midland, Texas. He went to Philips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts. He went to college in Connecticut. He went to graduate school in Massachusetts. Should it comes as any surprise this guy doesn't know dick about being a rancher? Ten bucks says that stupid accident is fake.

[Judi Lynn]

24. Listening to Chris Matthews or Keith Olbermann's show earlier tonight,

without really focusing on what the latest Bush speech clip said, since I was in another room, I heard the host, probably Tweety, suddenly say "Where'd the accent go?"

Whoever was his guest snickered, and they both commented on the fact he has recently dropped using his Texas drawl!

Since most of us tune him out, from habit, when we hear his voice, it might be a good idea to see if this is a constant thing now. It would really hack off his ignorant right-wing voter base!

[Riktor]

26. Yeah, I kind of picked up on that....

His accent tends to recede when he is "serious".

It is funny you mention his voting block in relation to his accent. It might fascinate a number of people to know a northern Democrat hasn't occupied the Oval Office since 1945. Statistically, the odds are invariably stacked against a non-southern Democrat seeking the presidency. Even though I have a number of relative below the Mason-Dixon line, it is a part of the country I truly cannot understand at times.

[Maccagirl]

27. Not to nitpick, but aren't you forgetting someone...

A guy with a very thick Boston accent won in 1960, I believe.

[Riktor]

74. Whoops...

How could I forget THAT guy???



Well, you got me there. Of course, it has still been over forty years since he took office, and it could be argued his dad rigged the election anyway. But that's really beside the point, considering the Northern Democrats lost the South after LBJ passed the Civil Rights Amendment, which is really at the core of the "Backlash".

[Ecumenist]

28. Ummm, what about Kennedy? eom

:shrug:

[Thor_MN]

46. The stupid in his accent is 100% real, it's the Texas that's fake

[truthisfreedom]

17. All hat and five cattle.

[melody]

20. Bush is a faux-Texan

He speaks normally with a blue blood, New England preppie accent. He didn't start that noxious
stereotypical "Barney got aftera armadilla" crap until he ran for governor. Even then it wasn't
nearly as maple-thick as it is now.

[Orsino]

29. A cosplayer. n/t

[Cobalt-60]

21. A defenseless frog is one thing

A ton of horse is another.
The animals probably recognize him as a dirtbag, too.

[dweller]

30. "his fondness for shooting doves"

dp

[aquart]

32. "Shooting doves"????? Oh, that figures.

[onehandle]

33. That silver spoon Connecticut Yankee?

Make that: George Bush the "Texan" is 'scared of horses'

[deacon]

34. Considering the way he rides a bike, you can't blame him :)

[DrDan]

35. give the guy a break

he falls off bikes.

he falls off segways.

he apparently falls off the couch if attempting to munch a pretzel.

He knows his limitations . . . . and there are quite a few.

[deacon]

36. LOL!

[karynnj]

60. Yep, and the media declared him an outdoors man.

Think of how biased the media was on this - not important in real life, but important politically issue.

Kerry rides his bike in 100+ mile races for charity, coming in with excellent times - for any age, in his late 50s and 60s, Bush routinely falls off his mountain bike.

Kerry is an expert horseman.

Kerry is an expert skier and a very competent ice hockey player.

Kerry can windsurf ....

So, the media plays it as Kerry is funny looking when he windsurfs, a sport Bush would be better off not trying. What does the liberal media do - say that it was stupid for Kerry to windsurf - that he should be cleaning brush.

[jimshoes]

37. Didn't Pickles once say George the stupid

once tried to milk a horse, a male horse at that?

[Up2Late]

70. Yes, it was at the 2005 (I think) White House Correspondent's dinner...

...but the May 2 and May 3, 2005 Daily Shows that reported on it were WAY better than the real thing!

Unfortunately, YouTube deleted it, so if you want to see it, you probably need to figure out how the BitTorrent thing works, here's a few links to get you started:

<http://www.torrentz.com/search?q=daily+show>

http://www.utorrent.com/download.php

This file might have it, I'm not sure: <http://www.torrentz.com/5b3056ef5a53bf4654667fa32e2b9142ba663967>

[Tab]

39. As cocky as he is, I doubt he's "afraid of horses" in general...

but as a former horse owner (probably owned about 5 or 6) I can tell you that you need to have a healthy respect for horses. Some are really nice, and you can commune with them all you want, but you can tell when a horse is in a nasty (or unwelcoming) mood (usually by the ears, which will be laid back). In those cases, you should steer real clear of the horse. Dogs can be mean, and bite, but they don't weigh close to a thousand pounds.

I'm no defender of George-y boy, but there's nothing wrong with being afraid of a horse. They're big-ass animals and smart, and can do a lot of damage.

In this case, perhaps the horse was smart enough to recognize an ass was in front of him instead of a man, and astute enough to be suspicious.

[soothsayer]

49. No, alot of Cancerian men are afeared of horsies (but generally good with animals)

[TX-RAT]

54. you should steer real clear of the horse.

That's no joke. i've seen horses cause some pretty devastating injuries. One of the boys that comes out to my place had the whole top of his head bit of when he was about 14. A big mare bit him just above the eyebrow all the way back to behind his right ear. They were able to sew the scalp back on, but unable to save the ear. About 8 years ago we were working some cows on a neighbors place when one of the boys came across a big stud horse with a covey of girls. The big stud attacked his horse and in the process, bit him so bad he lost his left leg. We had to fly him out on a helicopter or he would have bleed to death right there.

[Orsino]

40. Can't everyone see that he's frightened of *everything*?

Isn't it obvious that he's ten pounds of insecurity in a five-pound bag, held together by the duct tape of Daddy's Money?

[rodeodance]

41. oh those Brits! love it

[rodeodance]

42. George W Bush saddles up,but where is the horse? (photo on website)

[C_U_L8R]

43. Bush's ranch is just an "agricultural exemption"

Put a cow and a few chickens in the backyard
of your McMansion and bingo... tax-free ranch.

George Bush is a cheat as well as a liar.

[Felix Mala]

47. Horses are smarter. Of course W. doesn't like them... He dislikes all "elites..."

[soothsayer]

48. Bet he's handy with a stump broke mule

[merh]

51. I think when they made him pose for this photo it scared him

and scarred him for life.





Stuffed ponies can be frightening, you know. :silly:






fake cowboy, fake leader, fake human :argh:

[Javaman]

52. first let's make one thing clear, moron* is not from Texas.

he's from Connecticut. And he* fear of horses is the result of a failed equis/relationship.

[Roland99]

57. Check out this Will Ferrell video for ACT from a few years ago!!!!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x1868308

:rofl:

[westcor]

58. damn

this is the first thing I have in common with the guy. I do not like horses, they look like the have no souls. Look in their eyes, there is a meaningless wondering feel to them. Beautiful animals other than that.

[antigone382]

69. I've looked in lots of horse's eyes

I've always found them to be very expressive and generally warm. Of course, I've owned mostly Arabs which have a lot of personality, but still...I've never seen a horse I thought looked soulless.

[Boudica the Lyoness]

59. I've owned horses for 37 years

The thing about horses is you can't make them do what you want by bullying them. They don't respond well to loud mouth dick heads jerking them around.

[Sequoia]

61. Horses are afraid of Bush...they know who the evil humans are.

[0007]

63. It has been that junior can't even ride Laura!

[3waygeek]

79. Of course Laura has to be on top...

We all know that Dubya only knows how to fuck up :evilgrin:

[Doctor_J]

65. Phony cowboy, phony "business man", phony "Christian"

A pathetic loser who'd be living in a box if he weren't rich.

[tiptoe]

71. ... phony "president"

... "President Fraud"

[damntexdem]

67. But he's not afraid at all of brush.

And he even gets along OK with bicycles and Segways, even though they sometimes try to hurt him.

;-)

[KamaAina]

68. Actually he's only scared of horses' front ends

they block his view :evilgrin:

[loves_dulcinea]

73. i grew up around horses

somewhere inland of corpus christi. those bastards scare the shit out of me too. fuggin things'll run just fine then the next thing you know the bastards get the bit in their teeth and theres no keepin them out of the cactus. not fun. never mind that the bastards'll bite(, or stomp or kick) the shit out of you for no reason that you can figure.

as a senior in high school i weighed a whole 98 lbs, sopping sweaty wet. my father wanted me to be a jockey. he felt the jockeys he was paying were holding his horses back on the track, said they were dirty. i told him "hell no". haven't looked back once with regret either. those dumbass boys were breaking their bones on gates, getting trampled and all kinds of other crazy shit. to hell with horses and

fuck bush.

[ryanmuegge]

77. The word Texan should be in quotations.

He's no more a fucking Texan than I am (here in rural Illinois).

[3waygeek]

78. Reminds me of one of Freud's patients...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Hans">Little Hans.

[Skittles]

80. bush is as phony a cowboy as he is a Texan and a president

the only thing real about him is he is a real fucking asshole

[judaspriestess]

81. Bush is NOT a Texan

[baldguy]

89. Bush is a Texan like the stage set at Crawford is a ranch.

[goforit]

82. Animals rule!!!.... Anyone who is scared of animals has mental issues.

[juno jones]

83. Horses aren't stupid

He's probably had bad experiences because horses can tell he's a dick and mess with him. He probably thinks he is supposed to sit and steer, just like a car, and you really have to have a certain level of cooperation with the animal. Bush doesn't cooperate with anyone.

My ex FIL always used to say someone was "20 years a cowboy and ain't never stepped in cowshit." Now I know what he meant.

[LeftishBrit]

86. Maybe because he gets them confused with donkeys?

[bklyncowgirl]

87. Horses are living bullshit detectors. Cocky George probably learned that the hard way.

Horses have an innate ability to sense hesitation, fear, aggression and all the other bad vibes that humans are so good at hiding from other humans.

I worked through college and high school at a riding stable leading trails and teaching riding so I know a bit about this.

I've seen old hack horses size up cocky, arrogant guys in seconds--you know--the kind who would tell us that they were great riders and would demand our fastest horse. Fortunately for those guys, we never let new customers near any horses that would actually hurt anyone. We had quite a few horses that while well broke and capable of giving experienced riders a decent trip, and given names to thrill the heart of any would be cowboy (Twister, Widowmaker, etc), could be counted on to simply ignore the idiots and do what horses prefer to do, following the other horses, grazing or maybe taking time out for a refreshing roll in the mud. We had one who knew the location of every low hanging branch along the trail but he only used that option on the most obnoxious and persistent.

This equine passive resistance always led to the guy loudly blaming the horse (old nag) or horses in general (dumber than turtles) or the barn (I should report you to the SPCA for running this beat up old thing). At that point I'd usually have a little fun with them. I'd get on the horse yourself or better yet get some little cowgirl wannabe to hop on the animal and take him through his paces. There's nothing that says "You're an asshole, Pal." like having a guy watch a horse that he'd declared ready for the glue factory fly over a line of jumps or run the barrels under the control of an 80 pound kid. It was even more fun if his girlfriend was with him.

If George had his first equine experience at a reputable riding stable he probably would have been given one of these old schoolmasters and been taken down a peg but not seriously hurt. If he was at someone's private stable--visiting someone's ranch or something--they might have easily over mounted a big, loudmouthed guy like Dubya--especially one who affected cowboy boots and a Texas accent. Hell, if he was as much an asshole then as he is now, I might have done it on purpose if I wasn't afraid of lawsuits.

Horses weigh ten times more than a human. Faced with an arrogant but ignorant and deep down frightened human a sensitive horse will bolt and an aggressive horse will fight and neither is a pretty picture. A horse is one of the few animals you're likely to come in contact with that is perfectly capable of killing you.

George probably did learn that the hard way.

[moondust]

88. The Marlboro Boy? Scared?

He ain't scared of no doves by golly. He kills 'em before they git him!

[LeftishBrit]

90. And he's not scared of poodles

He has a magic way of getting them to obey him!

[Seabiscuit]

91. Bill Maher's take: Bush isn't exactly afraid of horses, he just had a bad experience with one...

when he was in college he lost a debate to a horse.