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"Aug. 2005 Briefing Warned ~ Cheney Determined To Shoot Old Man In Face"

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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-22-06 08:54 PM
Original message
"Aug. 2005 Briefing Warned ~ Cheney Determined To Shoot Old Man In Face"
Edited on Wed Feb-22-06 09:01 PM by mzmolly
Satire courtesy of The Onion ~

White House Had Prior Knowledge of Cheney Threat

February 20, 2006 | Issue 42•08

WASHINGTON, DC—Government documents declassified today reveal that President Bush was briefed last summer of "a substantial risk" that Vice President Dick Cheney would shoot an elderly male in the face sometime in the next several months."

Reports indicate that the White House had this photo of Cheney hunting senior citizens as early as 2001. In a Presidential Daily Briefing given to Bush in August 2005, the CIA warned that the vice president was a potent threat to the senior population at large, and in particular "possessed the capabilities and intentions to spray a senior citizen with projectiles fired from a shotgun or other weapon." A second brief identified the population at risk as those "between 70 and 80 years of age," and warned that the vice president posed the greatest threat to "seniors in close proximity to the vice president when he is armed."

The brief, which urged the White House to take "the most thorough possible precautions to disable this threat to the faces, necks, and chests of the nation's elderly," was issued a full six months before the events of Feb. 11.

The emergence of the document is causing many to question whether Bush and his staff adequately understood or appreciated the the risk posed by Cheney.

Full "story" here -

http://click.theonion.com/c.html?s=6jy,ie5o,7kb,gbc,fquz,hvnc,ar26
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slor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-22-06 08:56 PM
Response to Original message
1. LOL...ty n/t
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tanyev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Feb-22-06 09:04 PM
Response to Original message
2. Oh, that's funny.
I'll bet nobody could have ever imagined that the Vice-President of the United States would shoot someone in the face.
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daleo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-23-06 12:12 AM
Response to Original message
3. That's priceless. n/t
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Independent_Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-23-06 12:38 AM
Response to Original message
4. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
:D
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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-23-06 12:47 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. I'm a fan of dark comedy, personally.
Of course this would be too dark had the man not been ok. ;)
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npincus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-23-06 12:51 PM
Response to Original message
6. LOL
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