What does New Orleans really think?

[3days]

I have an entry in the huffington posts contagious festival and it is deathpool interviews with the recently deceased. My first interview is with New Orleans.

Here's a bit:

The Death Pool is the nether region where we get to speak to the recently deceased in an interview setting. We have access to these entities through special NSA approved communication devices to the three final resting-places known to man as Heaven, Hell and Purgatory.

New Orleans
Today at The Death Pool we are fortunate enough to have the city of New Orleans. We realize that New Orleans is not dead however it was on life support for a few weeks and it was at this time that we conducted this interview. I am trying to be proactive and shit.

TDP: New Orleans, it is great to see you. To tell you the truth we here at The Death Pool thought you were an absolute goner.

NO: Well thanks darlin, now be a dear and hand me some of that absinthe.

TDP: That's what I'm talkin bout, if anyone deserves a drink right now it has to be you. Here you go and iksnay on the absinth........ehhhh oppellayyyy on the bsinthineeeeeeeee oooookkeeeeenoopppyyynoowww on the ohhh screw it I never understood that pig-latin shit.

NO: No problem sweetie and I won't say a word. GLUG GLUG GLUG...............Sweeet Mary's Ghost... Awwwwooooo.

TDP: So take us through it. What happened?

NO: It all started very innocently. I was laying out by the pool and Mother Nature comes over.....

TDP: Mother Nature?

MN: Hello, baby.

TDP: Hey Mother.

NO: So we were hanging out and Mother decides she's going to go down on me.

TDP: Now that's what I'm talkin bout. Give me some of that chick on chick action.

NO: Contain yourself Mr. Pool. Anyway, Mother tells me she wants to try out something new and starts gently blowing on my.....

TDP: OH hold on, I heard about this. Only thing is that I heard if you blow up a chicks cha cha that she'll die.

MN: First off, a "cha cha"? I make something that exquisite and you call it a cha cha?

TDP: How about a noo noo or a po po?

MN: We heard that you weren't that bright Mr. Pool but please try and follow along.

TDP: Sorry.

NO: That's all right baby, even dumb guys get laid. How else do you think Bush got reelected?

TDP: Thievery?



You can check out the rest here:
http://tdp.cf.huffingtonpost.com/