Those like me not doing so well .

[blues90]

I read most of the posts here to try to feel connected and to past some time I have since I am jobless .

I am lucky to be with my wife for 26 years and have our four cats .

Things sure can happen in a hurry , I never thought I would loose my job and never thought finding another at 57 would be so very difficult and frightening .

Since 1987 I have had bouts with panic attacks and anxiety attacks but had them under control up until the last 4 months of my 8 month job search . The more I was not called back after interviews and with the slow death of the auto repair field where I live in southern CA I find I have to find something else to do for work . This has been even more difficult since the panic attacks drive me into a trembling stance .

I always felt that the mind could not subject one to this internal torture or that depression and anxiety was a mental form of illness but I have no control over this now .

Thirty two years at the same thing and I'm lost in a world of the youth and low pay jobs as well as required advanced computer skills .

Most of the time almost daily I wake up in a panic , the reality of being jobless rushes in before I fully wake and I look at my sweet girl next to me and feel like a failure . She has not been able to work for many years now .

We can do without much and try to get by with even less just to have a rented roof and food and power and heat .

I just hope there are not alot of people in the same situation , I fear there are , however this is not talked about much if at all on many forums or in the news .

I see only the outsourcing of jobs and the closing and down sizing and this gives me a strong idea of what is going on .

Perhaps this post does not even belong here . I just felt the need to reach out to others .

[NMDemDist2]

1. you are not alone my friend

too many of us are in the same boat.

:hug:

[brentspeak]

2. Prayers

[acmejack]

3. Illegitimus Non Carborundum!

Keep the Faith, Brother. I really relate to what you are saying.

[Rex]

4. It sucks that in order to survive in a 'civilized society' we must toil

our mortal coil to do another's bidding. Bills suck. Paying for things sucks. Existence sucks. I've been way down that rabbit hole. I'm fortunate to have a roof over my head. Many people don't.

[roody]

5. Sending you some positive energy!!

Don't give up. Breathe deeply. Go for a walk. Enjoy today. We may all be gone tomorrow.

[jeffrey_X]

54. Sending some positive energy as well!

Be well during this holiday season.

[sinkingfeeling]

6. I'm very sorry for your plight. I was 'down-sized' exactly 1 year before my retirement by

one of the largest companies in America, IBM. They did give me 6 months of salary and a 'bridge' to my 30 year mark, so I could then get my full retirement (kind of, as they had already changed the 'formulas' twice to cut about 30% of the amount). Two months after being cut loose, I began to panic...what was I going to do?

However, as my brother-in-law says, I'm the luckiest person in the world. I saw an ad in the Sunday paper for a system programmer's position at the local university. I fit the bill as a mainframe programmer and filled out the application. I was their only candidate with mainframe experience (about 35 years) and got the job. What makes me lucky is I was the first system programmer they had hired in over 25 years. The man who had the position retired and the slot just showed up.

Hopefully, something similar will happen for you. Surely, there must be some repair shop that needs an experienced person. You might have to take a reduced salary (my new one was about 60% of my old one), but once 'back in the saddle', your mental fears will resolve.

[MasonJar]

7. Hopefully the dems will turn this around.

[KT2000]

8. Wow - I know what you are saying

Just sold my house to a relative (reverse mortgage situation) to make it. In my case it is an illness caused by chemical exposure that is not recognized by the medical community or employers. (no medical care for it)

I guess where I am lucky is that the injury was to the brain (executive function) and most of time I am oblivious to my situation - just keep working on things I make at home to sell. But when I do wake up with the realization of my situation, I am practically blinded by panic! Horrible feeling.

You are not a failure! The company where my brother works has shipped all their jobs to China. The venture capitalist owners are making a bundle and the unemployment line grows. It is happening everywhere.

Just hang in there! Fasten you seatbelt and listen for the inspiration that will send you to a new line of work.
And as for the panic attacks - they pass and they are over with and will likely disappear when things look up for you.

:)

[The Straight Story]

9. Kicking for you - and I understand

Will reply more later when I get back to computer.

[Rosemary2205]

10. A hug and an idea.

HUGS, and realize you are not alone. I am in my mid 40's, only high school and now in a wheelchair. It took more than a full year before I could even get an interview and by some miracle got the job. My husband was injured in the same accident and could not go back to his assembly line work. Eventually someone saw fit to train him to drive a forklift.
So you are not alone.

Secondly I have a suggestion. You fix cars. You are good at fixing cars, I would assume, after 32 years of doing it. You are most likely a born fixit guy. I bet you can fix pretty much anything. Like snowblowers, mowers, go carts, old cars. Motorcycles. These do not have the electronics and computerization newer cars do. You could probably even fix big industrial machine with just a little training.

It's easy to let your self esteem take a beating when your line of work changes on you and age has made life more difficult. Contact placement agents, the labor dept, the local community college - ask about retraining programs, ask about help writing your resume, ask about job coaching, ask about employement networks. Be brave and cold call every single fixit place within the distance you can travel. Remember your work ethic and experience cannot be replaced by a 20 yr old in a tech school class. You have a value those kids can't match and the trick is to be brave enough to stand up and sell it. (not too easy)

Yes, you will get rejected often, and yes when you get the job it will probably be for half salary and won't have any longevity to it. But this is the unfortunate world we now live in.

Also don't be ashamed to push for your disabled wife to get on social security disability - that usually takes awhile. She can make a claim under your social security. Also, check your current income. You may be eligible for food stamps or some other state aid - and possibly free job retraining. I know we all feel shame when we have to ask for help but this is what is there for. When people hit the hard times to help us back up on our feet.

More hugs

[faithnotgreed]

33. that is a beautiful post rosemary.

i am so glad for you and your husband. no doubt you have a special outlook that got you through.
and you give wonderful advice here. continued best wishes to you both and again thank you for posting such heartfelt and practical words

here are some hugs for you as well

[porphyrian]

11. Hang in there, man.

I've got anxiety problems myself. If you can get access to free or cheap meds, there are some good anxiety medications out there now that sort of turn down the volume on the attacks so you can function. I found one called Effexor to be particularly effective for me, but there are plenty of others and combinations of others that work. The catch 22 would be that, as you're unemployed, you probably don't have access to the medication that would help you get a job. You might want to check with free clinics in your area, or call a psychiatrist/psychologist/therapist that you trust and see if they know anyone who could take you on as a patient for free or at a reduced rate - that could get you therapy and meds.

At any rate, you are not alone, try to keep it together and enjoy the holidays. I have a feeling next year is going to better for most of us.

[skygazer]

12. I'm so sorry - it's a frightening situation

I feel fortunate to have my job but it requires a lot of physical effort and the older I get (I'm 46), the harder it is to do. I've had surgery on my neck and my knee and have to have another one on the knee. I often think how hard it would be to find something else that would pay me enough to live on.

I wish you well. :hug:

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

13. I was out of work for a year

during that time, I learned some basic online skills, and got a job as a temp. That segued into a bookkeeping job because I was willing to learn Quickbooks. Many small businesses use this software; its a good skill to have.

[Neecy]

14. Can I make a suggestion?

Yes, it's short term, but it might bring in enough cash to keep you afloat.

My sister bought a new car a couple of months ago and she didn't use her old car as a trade-in (she thought she could get more selling it herself). I put it on craigslist for her and while browsing the used car ads there I thought to myself, gee, if I knew how to fix cars I could make a lot of cash. Many of them were dirt cheap but had various mechanical problems - things that you could probably fix in a very short time and then turn the car around and sell it for a good profit. Yes, it's part of the "eBay" economy that the Cheneys of the world expect us to live in, but at least you'd be working for yourself and keeping all the profits.

Here's the link for craigsList Los Angeles if you're interested -

http://losangeles.craigslist.org/

On edit: just today there are two that probably wouldn't require a huge outlay of cash and that you could fix and make some money on it:

1986 Toyota Corolla 1986 Manual 5 speed.
Needs new radiator.

I'm selling as is. $200
---
1983 BMW 528e Auto + Free Auto Cool fanI bought this car when I first moved to Cali from the east coast after I had a mechanic look at it. I had a tune up, replaced the alternator belt, and the starter. The car ran good but now it needs a radiator, head gasket and an oil drain pan. My mechanic gave me a thousand dollar estimate to have everything done, however I am unwilling to do it. If you're willing to make the repairs yourself or get someone else to do it or even junk this car for parts then this car is a good investment for you. There's no AC or radio. I'm asking $100 OBO. The car needs to be towed.

[femrap]

24. That's a great idea!

I hope you can continue to use your skills in car repair....those are valuable.

Don't sell yourself short....you have skills! I wish I knew how to repair cars.

[kineneb]

15. been there, done that, had to bail out

I have posted our adventures here before...

Hubby losing job at WorldCom, age 55... the diagnosis of kidney disease several years before that... no IT jobs left in the US, and no one hiring older, less than healthy workers... selling the house in the Bay Area and heading for the hills... watching his health deteriorate until he was put on dialysis... fighting to get him proper medical care... me having another depressive episode...

Yup, been there, and we do so understand. Try not to blame yourself. You tried. PM me if you want info on dealing with depression from one who has been living with it since childhood.

[leftofthedial]

17. hang in there

LOTS of us in the same boat.

My advice to anyone over 40. Don't become unemployed.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

29. haven't managed that

Seems that getting close to fifty years of age is an unpardonable sin.

No matter your skills, education or experience. :cry:

For this I spent TWELVE YEARS in college???

[memerzatz]

16. Not doing well

I too am jobless and at 59 years of age I am almost constantly
in a panic state of mind. I am lucky to have a partner that is
putting up with me, having been diagnosed with type II
diabetes last month and a stent put in my heart a couple of
years ago I feel like I am on my way to the "elephants
graveyard"
  Its interesting to me that the above term is so interlocked
with the GOP symbol.
Just wanted to let you others know that this is a thing that
is happening everywhere. No more cable, and internet is next
to go, but we are getting by, It just feels like I am being
punished or something.
 Hopefully the new year will be an improvement

[Indiana_Dem]

18. Same thing happened to my husband @ 57....

He worked in 2 factories all of his life. Immediately out of Vietnam in 1971, he got a job in a factory and worked there for 23 years before it closed down and reopened non-union. The 2nd factory job lasted 10 years before IT closed down completely. That left him at 57 years old, no new world skills. They offered schooling but who wants to hire a new 60 year old or so grad without experience who is lamost ready to retire???? He went through quite the depression.

Through a friend, he worked as a sub-custodian for the local school system for $8/hr--half of what he was making in the last factory job--we also had 100% Blue Cross insurance coverage for which we never had to pay any premiums and a $2 prescription card! The contract covered us for a year and a half then we were done.

Then, just as the insurance was ready to run out, a full-time custodian position opened up at the school where he was working as the sub. He was passed over once which REALLY crushed him but then a second chance came up and saved us in the nick of time. Now he has a much more secure job than any factory has been to him, and we have insurance, although it will never be as good as we had it...those days are over.

He is now feeling much better after a year of employment at the schools. It's not what he had in mind and he does have to do quite a bit of heavy lifting unloading trucks for the cafeteria but he is thankful for the job at this late stage in the game. It pays a decent wage at $13/hr. (That's good for around here)

So you might think about looking for a position within a school system---bus driver, maintenance tech, custodian...there are many jobs in a school system you might not be aware of.

Good luck. Please don't feel alone. Something will come eventually.

[Jeffersons Ghost]

19. perhaps this post belongs higher up on the Greatest Page... sorry to hear of your troubles...

damn job-exporting traitors at Bushco... I hope our new leadership in Congress realizes that evil prevails when good people do nothing.

<on edit>

Oh yeah, I forgot, K&R!!!

[demobabe]

20. There are a lot of people in the exact same situation

Otherwise there wouldn't be so many commercials on TV for Ambien and those glowing green nuclear butterflies - Lunesta is it?

I've had my bouts these last five years - especially watching the web jobs that would pay $100k plus per year get shipped off to India where now frequently the same job in the US only brings $24k per year.

Somehow I've always managed to get through, although I can't tell you how many nights I'd wake up in the middle of the night in a panic.

And that's me, who is under 40, and has a good deal of skill that is fairly in demand.

The hardest thing is to keep positive and keep trying no matter what (and also ask for help when you need it - don't be afraid), and I believe that's the only way to make life better.

The more frightened and worried I become, the worse off things seem to go - sometimes I'd say "things can't get any worse" and then somehow they would find a way.

Makes you aware of how little is really in our control, but watching the generosity of the Democratic Underground helping each other out in times of need is encouraging.

I'm betting if you posted what kind of work you're looking for, a bunch of folks here would have some great ideas - regardless if any pan out or not, it can get your mind thinking in different directions than you would have come up with by yourself and help you with your own ideas.

But you make a good point. I know times are getting tougher for everyone, unless you're in the defense industry...

[Trajan]

21. I am currently recovering from such a situation ....

I dont want to detail it here, but after about 90 resume and application refusals in 9 months, I had to resort to extreme measures ....

I took a temp job in another state, and literally packed my bags and left my family at home for a decent job with NO benefits just to pay the bills .... Some 3 months later, after keeping my eyes wide open for other positions, I found the perfect opportunity that exactly fit my skillset ... It involved yet another move to yet another state, but it has paid off well for my children and I ....

I lived in So Cal for 38 years, and was laid off from a large aerospace corporation in an industry downturn that left me in much the same boat as you are now in : I was NOT going to find another job like I had for 24 years, and my options there were nil .... I HAD to leave to find work ... I had no choice ....

I dont have pathological anxiety issues, other than those induced by my worry about paying the bills and keeping a roof over my kids heads .... and that anxiety was quite real, but I am sure the issues you describe are far more difficult to manage, and I am very sorry for that ...

The bottom line is this: YOU are a valuable human being, and YOU can do good work, it is just a matter of connecting you to someone who needs your talents ... I know that sounds impossible now, but I swear you CAN make this happen for you .... It ISNT you that is defective, but the system that casts you aside .... You may have to accept lower pay and reduced benefits just to get started again .... and you may have to pay out for the medicine you need, even if it hurts ... If you have possessions that do nothing for you; SELL THEM, and buy medicine ....

You can always buy more 'things' when you get back on your feet .... Be prepared to go to where the work is .... trying to stay in a high rent area may damage your chances for success, and you will have to be more mobile than you had imagined in the past ....

Somewhere, someone NEEDS you and what you bring to the table .... You arent done yet .... You have to elevate your self image based on what you KNOW is right: You ARE worthwhile in your work, and you know it .... DONT LET the situation deceive you .... It ISNT you .....

I used http://www.aerotek.com and http://www.jobcentral.com in my search, and I know I saw mechanical positions open on these sites .... You may have to go somewhere you never considered in the past (I was looking at jobs in Florida, California, Missouri, Arizona, New England, Michigan, Illinois, Washington, etc, and I TOOK jobs in Missouri, Colorado, and wound up where I am now, Oregon ).... Be open minded and consider all the alternatives ....

I HAD to expand my horizons, because I would have not survived in So Cal if I had stayed .... I also found that such a search was exciting, as it opened up new vistas for my life, and allowed me to 'dream' of a new me with a new worldview ...

PLEASE do what you can to control your health issues by whatever means you can, and PLEASE look at those websites, and see if any jobs suit your skills ....

MOST of all: DONT give up ... This is a new chapter in your life, and your self image in critical to your success .... You HAVE to be able to let go of the negative feelings, and dream of a better future ....

That was more important than any other issue with me: discarding the awful feelings of dread and fear, and essentially constructing, out of thin air, an image of myself striving for, and finding, a successful outcome for my debacle ...

I KNOW you can do this .... PLEASE dont lose hope ....

[faithnotgreed]

32. thank you trajan for sharing your important story.

i am very happy your hard work paid off for you and your children.
your kind words of support and advice are a help to others in this situation. thank you for that and continued best wishes ...

[laylah]

22. ..

:hug:

Blessings blue...it WILL turn around, trust that.

Jenn

[man4allcats]

23. I've been there - recently.

Up until late October, I had been out of work for thirteen of the eighteen months preceding that time. I am 58 and had just about thrown in the towel in terms of getting back into the biotech field that I had been in for years. I too decided it was time to try something else. I found out that a good way to get bus driving training is to apply to any local school district as a bus driver. There is a high turnover among school bus drivers so districts are always hiring. They will hire folks and train them on the buses and then put them to work after they pass their state commercial driving tests. I actually drove for a week after passing my road test, and oddly enough at that very point when it looked like my new life's calling would be driving commercially whether school bus or otherwise, I got a phone call and an interview. I'm back in biotech now in a better slot than I was in for the last five years I was in that field.

My point is:

1.) Don't give up hope. It is harder when you're older, but it's not impossible.

2.) You might think about getting a commercial license. It occurred to me to give it a shot because whenever I read the Want Ads, I noticed that there are always lots of jobs for drivers, it's not hard work and the pay is at least livable. As I've said, bus driving training is easy to get, and you don't have to do long haul like the 18-wheeler guys. Your license is Class B rather than the Class A that the tractor trailer drivers have, but there are lots of jobs for Class B commercial drivers, and they're generally not concerned about your age. School bus driving is typically not full time, but it's a way to get your foot in the door (the training is free) and make a few bucks at the same time.

3.) I'm not really a religious person, but I can't close this without mentioning the, at the very least, quite odd sequence of events in my transition from school bus driver to "born again" research tech ("born again" at least in the sense of a new start, anyway). So much time had passed and I'd gotten so many rejections that in my mind and spirit I finally just resigned myself to the idea that I wasn't going to get back into research. My savings were gone. My unemployment compensation had run out. I had nothing left but my commercial license and a part time job as a school bus driver. And I mentally accepted all of that. I just decided that was the way it was and I needed to accept it and get on with my life. And oddly enough (or as my religious friends have told me, "maybe not so oddly"), at that very point when I gave up and decided to quit fighting and accept my fate, the door opened. Coincidence? Maybe. Or possibly not. Perhaps there really is a god who checks in on us every once in awhile at least. Maybe He or She or whatever It is just has a really twisted sense of humor and gets some kind of bang out of letting us jump through hoops for a time before finally cutting us some slack when it's clear we can go no further. I don't know. I'm no preacher. I just think it's a very odd coincidence.

Best wishes, best of luck, and Merry Christmas to you, your wife and your cats. It will get better if you remain strong and don't give up.

:thumbsup:

[badgerpup]

25. Sending you a hug and good wishes...

...and great respect for dealing so well with the panic attacks!
They can be paralyzing. :scared:

Some of the advice on the thread is excellent, about applying for SSI or even SSDI. Go for it.
You will most probably be turned down the first time; that's SOP, they do that to just about everyone.
Keep trying. Having a reliable monthly income, even a small one can make a difference in how you feel.

Here's a funny thing. If you are below a certain income level, then you are eligible for all kinds of assistance, like Medicaid, food stamps, energy assistance (they come out and insulate your house and you get help with your heating bill in the winter months. You might even be able to get a new furnace if your old one is about to croak).
These programs are there to help people like you; you won't be freeloading.
You've paid into them, you've supported them, now it's their turn to give YOU a hand.

I envy you your beloved sweet girl and your cats...you have fine companions.
That makes even more of a difference. :hug:

[blues90]

26. Thanks to all of you for your kind words and support

I very odd thing happened tonight . I listen to the Mike Malloy show every night , after I posted this topic I decided to email Mike Malloy , while listening to his show He read my email on the air and dedicated the first segment of the show to Sarge and to me .

This was really shocking , what are the chances of this happening of all nights . I must say this did pick up my spirits as well as all of your replies here .

I found an add on craigs list to do lamp repair and rewiring and decided to call . The fellow sounded nice and the shop is very close to where I live . He did'nt have much time to talk so I have to call back tomarrow . It pays $10 per hour to start , not even half of what I used to make but there is room to go up . I do not know if I will get the job but I may and it's not difficult work . He asked my age and he said not bad , he is 72 .

I really tried all the auto dealerships of all makes and models but since my experience was with ford all these years it seems they desire either younger people or specific make experience , don;t know really since I never got any answers form the dozens I applied for . Ford is not hiring and going down hill here .

I was a assistent service manager since I really can't work on the cars anymore due to continued wear on back and hands . I give up on the auto industry , too many hours now and you almost live there at 6:30 am to 7pm plus sat . That's what I was working before and it is worse now .

I also do woodworking but this is another job where age sort of rules you out if it's anything beside finish work and even this is now a rush job industry . My father was a carpenter so i know it all well , but things have changed since 1966 when I last worked with him .

[faithnotgreed]

31. hi blues - i am so glad you have a lead on some work. Good luck

and make sure to let us know how you are doing.

You are cared about and lots of people here are sending you positive thoughts and energy and some prayers too (keep whatever you like and pass on the rest!)

take good care and do let us know
sending a hug for you and your wife and your 4 little furry children

[lildreamer316]

35. blues..

I had read your original post and also this one.

First; I am sorry; so very sorry that you are having to go through this.
Second; glad some of us have helped to cheer you up; and it sounds like you may get somewhere soon!
Third; here's kind of a crazy; but maybe a good-to-keep-in-mind idea:
There is a huge, and growing market for classic cars. Just look on tv: Overhaulin'; Rides; Pimp my Ride/Truck; the Speed Channel and their coverage of all things classic as well as the Barrett-Jackson auction in Scottsdale every year; etc. etc.
SOMEwhere in all this should be a spot for an experienced Ford guy! In collector car circles; the older experienced people are revered and valued.
Keep your eyes peeled for opportunites in this vein. There is no shortage of rich playboys and etc who want to restore the next junker. Maybe check the restore shops in your area? I bet SoCal is crawling with this; if not; AZ is certainly closer to you than, for example; it is to me!
Maybe even in the growing NASCAR frenzy; there is something you can contribute?
Hopefully there is some young guy out there in love with the Mustangs and who needs a mentor.

Keep your eyes open; and don't completely abandon all that experience just yet. You never know.
:hug:

[Zhade]

27. Another reason I really, really hate that motherfucker in the White House.

Hey, I'm in SoCal, if you need a hand in any way just PM me. I'll help if I can.

[bobbolink]

28. All of that stress is so hard, but having your body react so painfully is the worst!

So many times I feel like my body is betraying me, because I just can't take so much of the pain.

My best wishes for you and your wife.

And, you are definitely NOT a failure!

It's our society that is failing.

Be very good to yourself! :hi:

[moondust]

30. Two suggestions you can take or leave.

1. Keep yourself in the best physical condition possible. It matters to the mind as well.

2. Consider moving, if feasible, to someplace where housing takes a much smaller bite out of the finances and everyday living may be more down to earth/less exasperating than southern Cal.

Just my $.02. Good luck!

[Quantess]

34. Be strong. Depression is a big, nasty, downward current.

PM me if you'd like. I'm nice, and I know what it's like to have anxiety and depression at the same time. Anxiety and depression feed off each other.

[Skidmore]

36. I'm in a similar boat.

We were fortunately able to get out debt paid off earlier this year before I lost my job. But the truck needs a muffler and if the work car bites the dust, we are in a world of hurt. I've gone back to school to supplement my masters degree with a certification but I'm apprehensive about being able to find a job in my field. I've been ill this past year and get back on my feet has been laborious. The world of work is a very frightening place to try to reenter after years of being in a line of work. So much has changed and the older you are, the less they are interested in talking to you.

I posted something similar several months ago. Things are not so much changed, only that I've started working on the certification instead of just sending out resumes. Your post very much belongs here because it speaks to a real problem in this nation right now, and one that is glossed over or ignored. What do you do about an aging population when the infrastructure and family support networks that would have traditionally been available to help them are being dismantled by bad government policies?

Good luck, my friend.

[Le Taz Hot]

37. Please keep posting

and know you are not alone. Believe me, college degrees and knowledge of computers if one if over 40 (as is my husband) or worse, one is over 50 (as in myself) is NO advantage. Outsourcing and age discrimination abound.

And you are correct, we NEED to talk about it and the mods at DU need to quit locking/deleting threads like this wherein people reach out for compassion and understanding. You post whenever you need to.

[democrank]

38. Glad you reached out, blues90.

As you can see, you have a lot of support here. Try to keep your chin up.

[bonito]

39. One day at a time

I could offer you our story for these last nine years but I lived it once and don't care to bring it up to the present, and for tomorrow may always be full of fear, I surrender to the present and carry on, because it's here I'm winning in keeping my wife alive with her family. Peace

[Herman Munster]

40. take control of your life

#1 on your list: expand your job search outside of Southern California.

Look at areas with lower cost of living where you can stretch your savings even more, if you cannot find employment for years.

Think about making the move now while you still have resources or you may end up running out of money and homeless.

[Lost4words]

41. I'm 52 former IT professional, no work for 4 years, we moved from DC to NM

there have been nights that I have prayed to pass, but another morning comes and I am reminded that I am nothing.

As far as the folks who say chin up. They mean the best, but if you haven't been here you can never know what its like.

I have my up days and my down days but my life today is like walking on a frozen lake. At any moment the bottom will drop out, and it wont be death.

Never in my life did I ever think that while healthy I could not support my family!

No terrorists or foreign power has done more damage to my family than George W Bush.

Remember smiles are for children not discarded workers.

But I am truly bitter, against all odds I achieved the American Dream and then I witnessed its exportation.

Do you have any Idea how foolish I feel for my Buy America first policy?

I actually supported them and got a corporate shiv in my back.

Just keep trying, I dont know how I am saying this but its what I am doing, somehow.

[pitohui]

42. you're definitely not alone, i doubt i will be able to work again

don't know what to tell you, age discrimination is real, lack of opportunity in america is real, i do not know how people between the age of 50 and 65 are even supposed to get medical insurance, the route of going self-employed or starting your own business will actually cause you to spend/lose more money even faster because you won't be able to find affordable health care

i just have no clue what to do but i presume that if my husband's job goes then we will have no option but suicide or a life of crime, even with saving over 10 percent of our incomes a year (way above average) the amount we were able to save would be gone long before we could qualify for social security/medicare, it is just impossible for real people in real jobs to save up the kind of money needed if you are considered redundant and unemployable in your fifties because you would have to somehow make money come out of the air and support yourself for ten or fifteen years!

at least we paid off our house, but global warming and the storms may take away our ability to be able to afford insurance on it, so if another disaster comes (we've been through two in less than 5 years, including katrina) we would be screwed there too

i think many people don't talk about it because what is there to say, there seems to be no real alternative, if only a few people were being hurt there would be options but with millions in the same mess chasing the very few opportunities, then most of us are going to get left out in the cold no matter how hard we try

many here are getting even more in debt by getting (yet another) degree or certification then finding because of their age that they have wasted their time and money

i am at a loss and can only offer :hug:

[Nikia]

43. I think that employers discriminate against people with anxiety conditions

When they are noticeable during the interview. At least for me, an interview was a very anxiety triggering situation. I didn't take aprazalam (xanax), which I had for panic and severe anxiety situations because it seemed to slow me down mentally in general, also putting me at a disadvantage. It does have fewer side effects for many people though and is cheap in its generic form.
I think that often small businesses are more likely to be understanding about anxiety than larger companies that often have specific hiring criteria that automatically exclude or penalize anyone not appearing completely comfortable and confident at the interview.
I wish you luck in your job search and that your anxiety will lessen.

[Irishonly]

44. Payers

I am keeping you, your wife and four cats in my prayers. I have always believed prayer can move mountains even when it seems there is no hope left. I hope that even for just a little while every day you can have some peace in your mind and heart. During those times there will be some opportunities that you may not have even been aware they existed.

[nam78_two]

45. K&R.nt

[barbtries]

46. i am in So CA

and lost my job in August; it took 6 weeks to get another one and the pay rent or quit sign was on the door the same day i was finally hired. i have a 14-year-old son and the deal to keep the apartment we're in was essentially that all my earnings go to the rent. our electricity was cut off this week and that meant another $150 the landlord would not get but i am fortunate because i have been in the building for 10 years and they have some sympathy for a bereaved mother, as my daughter was murdered in 2001 ... it took 3 years to get back to work. we lived on the generosity of friends and family, disability, and the proceeds from the wrongful death lawsuit. when i quit the first of the 3 jobs i've held since going back to work , i curled up on the couch for about a month before getting a job. same thing after being fired in august this year.

visualize success. feign confidence at every interview: it will inspire confidence in the prospective employer and build up some real confidence in yourself. take advantage of the programs offered through the EDD and elsewhere. You can do this.

we all can and must do what must be done...to kowtow to despair and desperation gives the day to the wrong side. peace out

[Miss Chybil]

52. I just wanted to offer my condolences for the loss of your daughter.

It's easy for us to find ourselves in despair and so hard to get out. There is no easy answer. There is no advice that's going to "fix" it. The only way to find the way out is to keep putting one foot in front of the other, day after, sometimes terrible, day. You are proof of that and you are an inspiration.

I struggle with depression myself. My grandmother commited suicide and my father and sister are both on anti-depressants. I can get pretty down on myself, and life, sometimes. It's then I come across someone like you. Or, I see an Iraqi mother on t.v. tearing at her hair because half of her family has just been blown up, or a hear another soldier is not coming home. While I realize all pain is relative, I also realize my life is pretty damn good in comparison to the lives of the vast majority of the people on this planet.

To the OP, as humans living in this day and age we have been blessed with longer lives than any generation before and, perhaps, after us. We live twice as long as a good majority of people did in the 19th century. In effect, we have two lives. You, sir, are just beginning your second one. May you enjoy the challenges it will present you and may you grow to know your full potential, as I hope we all will. I have a gut feeling you will soon find your new life and you will very much like what you find.

[nashville_brook]

47. i'm in the same boat

got the panic attacks too. they started way before i was unemployed tho. then i got real sick with an infection in my spine. now i have chronic pain and fatigue and the lingering threat of recurrent infection.

i'm 40 and divorcing my husband/partner of 20 years. my skill set is in print design and creative direction and as a 40-year old, i have a VERY limited choice of jobs. but, once i actually GET a JOB, i have to be able to control the pain and fatigue in order to KEEP the job -- in a VERY competitive field.

i'm still looking, but i've pretty much figured out that i can't do the traditional full-time grind that i did in the past. it's all very disheartening.

keep your chin up, as i will mine. something will break soon... i'm sure. :hug:

[RestoreGore]

48. to fight your anxiety attacks...

As hard as it is, and I know because I suffered from them years ago as well, you must think positive thoughts. Surround yourself with things that make you feel good and comfortable. Stay close to your wife and love her. And most of all, do not blame yourself. Positive energy is a very strong force, and it will help you through this.

I know how hard a blow it can be to your self esteem to be unemployed. I was let go from my job at a large corporate bank years ago that has remained nameless to me since (for reasons I won't get into here) only a couple of months after my husband was laid off, and we had a baby to care for. We lost everything because of it, our credit rating, our savings, everything, because we had to liquidate it to live. It took him 21 months to find something else simply because even though he had twenty plus years experience in his line of work, he didn't finish college. Believe me, age isn't the only discriminating factor in the job market and we both learned the hard way that there are no guarantees in life... but we made it through and we did it together through thinking positive thoughts, loving each other, and never letting it get us down.

My prayers and good thoughts go out to you and your wife, and I know if you just keep at it and always maintain a positive outlook that you will conquer your panic attacks. The saying that that which does not kill you makes you stronger is so very true. The best of luck to you.

[Connonym]

49. Me too

Thank god for a doctor who is willing to prescribe Xanax. I'm still working part time my client list has dwindled. I need to find a new career but I don't know what yet. I'm currently in the process of selling my house and some of my stuff. I'll be moving in with my mother. How humiliating is that?

Unfortunately, you are not alone.

[earth mom]

50. Your post and others in this thread are simply heartbreaking.

Dh and I have been there, done that; living as the working poor for 8 cold and long years; knowing that the bottom of our house of cards could fall down around us at any time. What a living hell! A little over 2 years ago, at age 46, DH did manage to find a job that actually paid a decent wage and we have slowly but surely been pulling ourselves out of the mire of debt ever since-and I'm not talking credit card debt either! Getting that job was a fluke, a miracle, whatever you want to call it because when you're pushing 50, as many have stated on this thread, decent jobs are nowhere to be found whether you have a degree or not. IMO, what corporate america has been allowed to pull on the people of this country in the past 25 years with the blessing of the government is an out and out crime! :grr:

Regarding your situation...Have you tried non traditional car repair avenues such as local colleges and universities, UPS, USPS, Fedex or the like? Or do you have a hobby or a talent that you may be able to turn into an income? Perhaps you could explore what you LOVE to do as a way to earn a living. Here are some books that may inspire:

http://www.amazon.com/Your-Money-Life-Transforming-Relationship/dp/0140286780/sr=8-1/qid=1166823538/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8134305-0987958?ie=UTF8&s=books

http://www.amazon.com/What-Should-Do-My-Life/dp/0375507493/sr=1-1/qid=1166823684/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8134305-0987958?ie=UTF8&s=books

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1580087949/ref=pd_cp_b_title/104-8134305-0987958

http://www.amazon.com/Cool-Careers-Dummies-Marty-Nemko/dp/0764553453/sr=1-1/qid=1166824055/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-8134305-0987958?ie=UTF8&s=books

http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Know-What-Step-Step/dp/0142002488/ref=pd_sim_b_5/104-8134305-0987958

[Stardust]

51. A while back I PM'd you about a possible opportunity and you didn't respond...

Pehaps you didn't get the message. If, however, the idea simply didn't appeal to you, a "No thanks," would have been nice. Good luck.

[ninkasi]

53. We all know what a traitor is

Someone who betrays their country commits treason. They are considered traitors. What is it called when a government betrays it's own citizens? Somehow, in reading your story, and in many of the responses, where decent, hard-working, good people have worked hard, and paid taxes all of their lives, to be kicked to the curb when they are not considered profitable enough, seems to be a form of betrayal. Employees get older, and instead of valuing their experience, and years of service, the heartless corporations let them go before they can collect a pension, if their company still offers one. The insurance goes with the job.

Many, like you, are caught in the no-man's land, where it's difficult to impossible to find a job, but you're not yet eligible for Social Security. Often, foreign workers are brought in, only to be trained by the one whose job they are taking. Jobs are sent overseas, businesses incorporate in the Bahamas, and the government under Bush has done it's best to prevent the wealthy, and big businesses, to keep from paying taxes. We are asked to sacrifice our children in an unending war.

I am so angry, and sad, for all of you. You played by the rules, and did everything you could to have even a modest piece of the American Dream. That dream has now become a nightmare, and this government is BORROWING money, which our children and grand-children will have to repay, in order to fund the tax slashes for the upper class. Any expenses government under Bush has reduced, have been for social services, the safety net, which is supposed to keep us from hitting the ground.

I wish I had some practical advice for you. I firmly believe that we all should flood Congress with protests about job losses to other countries, for one thing. We need to get out of Iraq, and spend the money instead on people like you who have been ground down by Republican greed. Next, with the chasm growing even greater between wealth and poverty, we need to roll back every single tax break given to the wealthy. It is high time to get as angry, and fed up, as we have been about the carnage in Iraq, and let our politicians know that we elected them, and we expect certain things, and that if they don't deliver, we now know we have the power to elect ones which will.

I've seen a lot of good suggestions that others have given, and I hope and pray that one of those will bring you work. I wish the same for all the rest of you. You are the people who labored to make America what it is, and without you, America will become just another 3rd world country. We are expected to be patriotic, but our country should feel the same loyalty to us. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you who are experiencing so much difficulty. I'm sending good thoughts to you all.