For Halloween we'll be waterboarding for apples!

[Philosoraptor]

I've set up a Halloween display, but with a "Haunted Gitmo" theme, entertaining the little trick or treaters while teaching them a valuable lesson about terrorism and the tools we need to fight the war on terror. Terror and Halloween go hand in hand after all.

Kids can be tied to a board and repeatedly dipped into a vat of water just brimming with fresh Washington state apples!

Then we can simulate interrogation techniques with black hoods, (or panties), scary dogs and mild electrical shocks!

Suspicious looking goblins will be profiled and separated from their parents and not allowed to see them indefinitely, whereupon they will be fed only candy and water and made to stay up for several days!

Then they have to walk a spooky gauntlet while my kids dressed like Osama and his number two man Saddam leap out at them wearing dynamite around their waists ululating loudly!

Then as they leave we put ashes and rocks in their candy bags to remind them of the twin towers and how they will be attacked again if their moms and dads vote Democratic and not for president bush, who all kids know keeps us safe at night while we slumber.

[AnneD]

1. I vote

to give the kiddies some C4 from Al QuaQua and let them have their own fun making IED's. And maybe a copy of My Pet Goat and a Selective Service Registration Form since we don't want to leave a child behind. Remember...nothing says love'n like something from the coven....

[Philosoraptor]

3. No witches, devils, wizards, fairies, or demonic costumes allowed

children must be dressed ONLY as biblical figures, except the wicked ones.

[lapfog_1]

2. And when they are old enough... they get to go next door

to the secular agenda pro-abortion house of horrors! In between, perverts of every stripe will text message "want some candy little girl/boy" at them.

[Philosoraptor]

4. boo!