Six easy tips to better gas mileage

[JohnnyRingo]

We can't start too soon:
http://www.thespeciousreport.com/2006/06060426gasmileage.html








...Sorry, I went to the local tonight and I'm feelin' good..

[Floogeldy]

1. Here are a few more . . . .

Walk. Jog. Hitch a ride. Crawl. Bicycle. Tricycle. Unicycle. Moped. Scooter. Take the bus.

[Fountain79]

2. Ummm.... are they serious?

This is a joke right?

[MADem]

11. Cut their throats?? I should hope so!!

The last one is pretty hilarious, in a sick way....

"Instead of rewarding them with ...bonuses...we should be murdering them in their sleep."

:rofl:

[warrens]

17. I would say "always drive downhill" is specious advice, yes...nt

[gkdmaths]

3. I like to pretend that

there is a cuddly little kitten between my foot and the accellerator.

I like the nascar drafting techinque, It seems like someone is always doing that to me, though.

[Viva_La_Revolution]

4. dude! Obviously you are tanked!

(so am I, but that's beside the point)

#2 Tailgating...! :wtf: ! ARE YOU INSANE?
This is why I don't drive anymore... 50% of the morons behind the wheel are, well... MORANS!!

Save 16% on gas.... lose your LIFE.

#1 is the only tip worth remembering... the rest are crap. "always drive downhill" :rofl:

[ComerPerro]

5. its satire

[Viva_La_Revolution]

7. I get that...

so was mine... lame as it was.

Well, maybe 'satire' is not the right word.

:rofl:

[IChing]

10. It's Satrie

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
Jean-Paul Sartre


One is still what one is going to cease to be and already what one is going to become. One lives one's death, one dies one's life.
Jean-Paul Sartre

Only the guy who isn't rowing has time to rock the boat.
Jean-Paul Sartre

Just throwing some existialist irony on the humor.

funny link, i do like the downhill joke.

[Wonk]

12. That's why folks put big tires on the back of their musclecars, y'know

so they're always driving downhill ;-)

[Turbineguy]

8. We drafted

a truck for about 400 miles. Got 50+ mpg.

We were in college then. Amazing thing, survival.

[JohnnyRingo]

15. "The Specious Report"

Is "specious" to say the least.

It's OK though, I think the humor is even more subtle in cheek than "The Onion"

On edit:
I see now that you understood. Joke's on me now

[ComerPerro]

6. there are a lot of desperate people out there who will

take this seriously.

"Yes, yes, that's it. I'll put a brick in my gastank, then run up to 125mph so I can coast downhill while tailgateing someone!"

[fishwax]

9. well, there are a lot of people who don't know much about cars

the suggestions get more obviously satirical as they go down the list, but I've known people (indeed there was a thread on DU a week or so ago by someone) who didn't know to change/check the oil in their car.

[MercutioATC]

13. Only #1 is real, obviously.

(I thought that was a given until I saw the "Are they serious?" post)

Although I have used a couple of the other suggestions with some success...

[deaniac21]

14. In vino veratas...

[Jed Dilligan]

16. Driving downhill is a good suggestion

provided your car is also a submarine, since any consistently downhill route will eventually lead to water.

Once submerged the car can sink with its engine off, thereby increasing the distance traveled without using more gas.