While Keith's away, read this brilliant send-up of "Casey at the Bat"--

WhirlyGirl

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Thu Apr-14-05 12:54 PM
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While Keith's away, read this brilliant send-up of "Casey at the Bat"--

. . . composed by "CelesteG" over in the QuickTopic forum. See if you don't agree this is *SO* on-target! --

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CelesteG Post# 5768
4-12-2005 10:01 PM ET (US)

In tribute to this sad occasion, a poem...

"Olby at the Desk"

The outlook wasn't brilliant for the Countdown fans that day,
For a sad and lengthy week their favorite man was on vacay.

And then when Alison tried her best, and Monica did glow,
A pall-like silence fell upon the viewers of the show.

A straggling few got up to turn it off in deep despair. The rest
Clung to that hope which springs eternal in the female breast.
They thought, "If only Olby could but bring his snark -- it�s best!
We'd put up even money now, with Olby at the desk."

But story after story, all the news seemed far more sad;
From Michael Jackson�s woo-hoo, to the Jennings news so bad.

So upon that stricken multitude, grim melancholy sat low;
And the fans could hardly wait for Olby back upon the show.

But then the happy day arrived, to the wonderment of all.
They all gathered before the tube, prepared to have a ball.

And when the dust had lifted, and they saw what had occurred,
They found that Olby made 'em laugh with almost every word.

From three hundred thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
it rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;

it pounded through on the mountain and past Colorado�s snow;
for Olby, mighty Olby, he was back upon the show!

There was ease in Olby's manner as he sat there in his place,
there was pride in Olby's bearing and a smile lit Olby's face.

And when, responding to the cheers, he gave that winning smirk,
no stranger in the crowd could doubt t'was Olby�s snark at work.

Three hundred thousand eyes on him as he let fly his snark,
With all the cunning of Wisconsin cats and teeming Florida sharks.

Then, while the delirious fans all tried to get a grip,
defiance flashed in Olby's eye, a sneer curled Olby's lip.

And now the balled-up paper sphere came hurtling through the air,
and Olby sat a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.

Close by the sturdy cameraman the ball unheeded sped--
"I�ll see you all on Monday," said Olby.

"WHAT?!?!?" the fans all said.

From the homes chock-full of people, there went up a muffled roar,
like the beating of the storm waves on a stern and distant shore.

Not again! I can�t take it!" shouted someone from an armchair,
and it's likely she'd have killed herself had not Olby still been there.

With a smile of Christian(?) charity, great Olby's visage shone,
he pitched another paper wad, for his fun would go on.

He signaled to the cameraman, and once more the white sphere flew,
but the fans all still ignored it, and they cried, �WHAT WILL WE DO?!?"

"No!" cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered "NOOOOOO!"
But one smiling look from Olby made them know that it was so.

Their faces all grew stern and cold, they felt their muscles strain,
and they knew that it would be six long days till they saw him again.

The smiles had fled from all their lips, their teeth were clenched in hate.
�Will we have to watch O�REILLY now?!?� They couldn�t believe their state!

For their dear pitcher held the wad, and then he let it go,
and more than just the camera lens was shattered by that blow.

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright.
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light.
And somewhere women are laughing, and little children play�

but there is no joy in Keithville --
mighty Olby�s on vacay.

-- http://www.quicktopic.com/29/H/CCZ5hH7RnZhQ
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